Transcription

• Speaker #0

  I had to navigate the world by myself without anyone to talk to, without anyone really understanding what I was going through.

• Speaker #1

  Welcome to Neurodivergent Spot. I'm your host, Sam Marion. My pronouns are he, him, and I am a multiply neurodivergent therapist, speaker, and creator. My work focuses on all things neurodiversity, but my particular interests are in autism, ADHD, learning differences, and learning disabilities. My guest today is Eric Patterson. Eric, would you please introduce yourself to the listeners?

• Speaker #0

  Absolutely. Thank you, Sam. My name is Eric. I am a brain aneurysm survivor, as well as I endured years of childhood bullying, and I am dyslexic. So now I have empowered myself. I've taken the shame that I live with for so much of my life. And I help others to release shame and other low vibration emotions through 12 pillars in my coaching system.

• Speaker #1

  Before we continue, I've got a quick disclaimer. This podcast is for information purposes only and should not be seen as a replacement for therapy, health care, or legal advice. Awesome. Right here at the front, would you mind just sort of defining for us a little bit maybe or just tell us a little bit more about brain aneurysm for those who may not know even like what an aneurysm is?

• Speaker #0

  Right, right. Well, an aneurysm, an avian malformation is what I had. That is basically the blood vessels in my brain got all tangled up. So if you think about like, I don't know how many thousands of miles the blood vessels are in your brain, but all those blood vessels are getting tangled up like a hose and having a tiny, tiny leak. And so what happened is I had a tiny, tiny leak somewhere in my blood vessels. in my brain that the doctors had to unravel and uh yeah close up uh close up that uh that leak all right uh i really appreciate you uh explaining that because i know that um i have a tendency uh

• Speaker #1

  and i've done some previous episodes where i get towards the end realize i should have had my guest explain uh what that is uh you know what is the experience and uh and in my first episode With dyslexia, actually. We were probably 15 minutes in, and the listeners will know this, that it was towards the end. I was like, wait, we should explain what dyslexia is, I guess. So I checked that box this time, got that one up front. Yeah. But, Eric, let's dive in with the questions. Question number one, and, you know, I told you the question, you know, the time will pop up on the screen for you as we get started here. So question number one, what has your journey? what neurodivergence looked like?

• Speaker #0

  Well, my journey, number one, was growing up in the 80s when all this stuff, neurodivergency wasn't even a word back then. And all these dyslexia and all that, they were treated like, oh, it's all in your head. You're just making it up. You're just lazy, whatever. And so for me, I grew up feeling very alone. feeling like nobody really understood what I was going through. Unfortunately, my parents sent me to see a child psychologist like a few times. But other than that, you know, I had to navigate the world by myself, without anyone to talk to, without anyone really understanding what I was going through. So that was very difficult. So yeah, it was just, it was a very lonely childhood. But in the end, you know what? it uh

• Speaker #1

  it made me stronger it's made me who i am today uh i i appreciate you sharing that yeah uh i i also grew up in the 80s where we just rub a little dirt on it right and then move on exactly just so eric i i'm i'm curious with this um do you define your your experience with an aneurysm as being part of neurodivergence

• Speaker #0

  I do. I do because the cerebellum, I believe. I don't have any proof of this. I've never gone to a doctor to check this out. But I believe because my memory is somehow affected. Especially with lists. You can give me five things to do and I'll go do them. But two minutes later, I'll come back and I'll be like, wait, what am I supposed to do after the first one? So, and I believe that's related to the cerebellum. So, yeah, yeah, it's affecting me in that way. So does that answer your question?

• Speaker #1

  Yeah. And you know, what I, what I find is neurodivergence, right. Is one of these things that people do define a little bit differently and there's certain things that people feel comfortable. I know some people that will describe certain aspects of kind of their experience as being neurodivergent, some not. And, and I think there is space for, for somebody to better define for themselves in that. And so that's a yeah.

• Speaker #0

  Yeah, I think it's like, you know, there's the neurodivergency where it's more of classically defined or it's defined, you know, it's something that's more or less common and that like this set of people has it. But then there's, I think, a neurodivergency where because of my aneurysm, it's affecting my cerebellum. So that's, you know, another kind of like not necessarily a norm. you know, but it's like neurodivergency that's happened because of, you know, a traumatic event.

• Speaker #1

  Yeah. I've used the language before of acquired neurodivergence, traumatic experiences, you know, psychological trauma that changes the brain operated one way. And now it's a little bit different. Maybe became hypervigilant, traumatic brain injury, you know, the experience with aneurysm where it's delicate as more of an acquired experience where there's, there's, I used to be a trauma therapist primarily, and I still do that some. But one way I would always define sort of psychological trauma was, or if an event was traumatic, there's a clear before and after way that we operated in the world. Right. And so that's, you know.

• Speaker #0

  Exactly.

• Speaker #1

  I appreciate you sharing about that. So let's keep going there. Question number two, you have spoken about the impact of childhood bullying and how it contributed to a shame identity. What advice do you have for others struggling with deep-seated shame from past trauma?

• Speaker #0

  I would say, rewrite your story. Know that you're not just a trauma survivor. You are a trauma overcomer. And, you know, you think about it like this. You think about like any champion, any boxing champion, whatever. They've endured the hits. They've endured the punches. They've endured the knockdowns, the knockouts, all that stuff. but They get back up. They get back up and they keep going. They don't allow their knockouts and that to define them. They decide that I'm the victor. I'm going to get the victory. So I think it's rewiring your mind to not let your past define you, to not say this is, you know, I'm something I'm ashamed of. I went through this. But to see yourself as the victor, to say, I'm going to get back up. I'm going to get back in the fight. And I'm going to get the victory because I am the victor.

• Speaker #1

  Love it. Any tips on how somebody can go from saying that to believing it?

• Speaker #0

  Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I would really focus on rewiring the subconscious mind and doing the subtle things. And that number one is I'm a fan of binaural beats. I have a YouTube page and I have, you know, all sorts of binaural beats, hundreds, thousands of binaural beats on there that people can look at. Also, positive affirmations. I'm a huge fan of positive affirmations. But again, in order for the positive affirmations to work, you have to believe them, you know? So I think, though, you know, that's where it comes in. just rewriting your story is when you put yourself, when you set yourself as the victor and not the victim in your story and the positive affirmations. And there's a bunch of different things that, that you can do, but those are, I'd say that those three are the top three that, that I've found the most useful.

• Speaker #1

  Got it. Awesome. I'm gonna keep going. Question number three. And I think this may tie into where we just were. You focused on helping trauma survivors release low vibration emotions. Can you...

• Speaker #0

  first share what that means and then also what that process looks like and why it's so important right right so first of all when i say low vibration emotions um it's what most people would call negative emotions i don't use the word negative because our emotions are part of us so when we call our emotions negative we're internalizing that and we're subconsciously calling ourselves negative in that all emotions... they have value. And so we need to see the value in those emotions. Our low vibration emotions just have different values. So what I do basically, and I'm sorry, could you ask what was the second part of the question quickly?

• Speaker #1

  Just explain some of that, more of that process of how we go about releasing these low vibration emotions.

• Speaker #0

  Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm sorry. There's the memory thing I was talking about.

• Speaker #1

  No problem.

• Speaker #0

  As far as releasing the low vibration emotions, you know, as I said, it's just doing that process of the binaural beats, really tapping into the subconscious mind, the binaural beats, the positive affirmations, even keeping a journal. our journaling, like about our emotions. If we have dreams journaling or keeping a dream journal, setting the, you know, the core values and all that.

• Speaker #1

  This may be an obvious question, but I find myself wondering this. If there are low vibration emotions, are there high vibration emotions? And how do we feel those differently?

• Speaker #0

  Right. But yeah, I think the high vibration emotions would be, you know, the love, the authenticity, emotions like that, that make us, when we're in flow, when we're in our way of being, and that when we feel empowered and all of that, like I can do anything, you know. And, you know, it's, yeah, yeah. Just like when you feel on top of the world, I think that's really like those would be. what I would call the high vibration emotions and how you get into those is you really have to release the low vibration emotions first. You can feel the high vibration emotions, maybe like temporarily, like while you have a low vibration emotions, if you're like in the right environment, you know, like at a conference or something like that. But once you leave the conference, I've been to, you know, conferences where I feel great afterwards. But then if I carry the low vibration emotions after I'm out of that environment, they'll come back to me, you know?

• Speaker #1

  You know, I'm also finding myself sitting here thinking about things like energy healing and things like that. Yeah. Where it is hard to find some concrete science to tie or connect to it.

• Speaker #0

  Right.

• Speaker #1

  But most people I know can feel some stuff around it. Uh, you know, so that's, I'm always sort of fascinated because I, I, I can't reach out and touch it, but I can feel it. Exactly. So, all right. I mean, I'm going to keep rolling forward here. Last question here. Um, what's one small, but powerful practice you recommend that you recommend for someone beginning their journey toward emotional healing and self-acceptance?

• Speaker #0

  Absolutely. I would say, and this is pillar one of my 12. pillar process. So I'm giving you guys anyone a head start. I would say write down your core values. Write down, I recommend 10 core values, love, authenticity, and that, and let those define you. And don't just write them down. You know, I have my core, I'm looking at my core values right now, and that put them somewhere. either in your bedroom, your office, wherever your workspace, wherever, where you can see them on a regular basis. And even you can go a step further and put them on a note app on your phone. And just like, you know, sometime during the day, scroll through and tell those core values. They become your way of being. And those low vibration emotions begin to like you begin to release them. You begin, they no longer define you or, you know. So, yeah, I would say core values.

• Speaker #1

  Eric, do you have a method for helping people figure out what their 10 core values are?

• Speaker #0

  That's something that's a lot of, you know, as I said, that's the first pillar of my 12-pillar coaching program. Just really, really talking to them. And I think, really, there are questions that a person can ask themselves as far as, like, when something happens to them or they see something happen. Like, for example, how does, you know, how does someone feel when they see a homeless person? You know, how do they feel? Do they feel like, oh my gosh? That's my responsibility. I need to give that person, I need to help that person out somehow. Then one of your core values might be compassion, you know, or helping other people. So I think it's really awareness of when you see something like, you know, how does that make you feel? And do you feel responsible for something? then, you know, responsibility, whatever. Like, I am a responsible person in that. So just different things like that, I think, being aware.

• Speaker #1

  I find myself, so I'm a therapist in private practice, amongst other things that I do. And I work with a lot of parents. I get calls from people that want me to help kind of work with a kid. And I'm like, well, let me start with you, parents, because, you know, if you bring your kid to my office for an hour a week, But they go back in the environment where they may not feel very supportive. But them right now, sometimes the diagnosis sort of dictates that a little bit. But that's some of what I talk about is sort of what are the family values, your core family values as a whole. And then we set boundaries for our kids around that, even things like safety. We don't hit each other. Yeah. It's a good, it's a good family value to have, you know, but, but other things of like, I can just think a lot of examples of how important is it that your family eats dinner together at the table? Or is it more important that you'll have family time together every day that you enjoy? Like that's a poor family value. Like which one is it? Is it, you know, and maybe, and for some families, those are the same thing. They enjoy dinner at the table. And that's the, like being honest, I think too of like what do you want and what actually works and and how do you feel most aligned and again i do this a lot with with parents and families uh but i i certainly see that space where as an individual how do you do that for your family if you don't have your own values right lined up yeah such a big starting point um i'm just sitting here meshing it like when i'm with the parents i'm trying to two people's values together why we start with the parents because sometimes they're not always prepared to to have the same same values right um we should have gone a little bit deep with each of these questions but i'm curious is there one of these questions we talked about or or any topic we've talked about so far that you may want to go back to uh for a little bit more kind of depth or or is there something that you'd want to share with the audience that we haven't that hadn't come out yet today um

• Speaker #0

  yeah i i think just uh you know really because i've talked about like these these 12 pillars. Um, but you know, I, I feel like maybe defining, defining those more would help people to understand, you know, a little bit more about, uh, you know, what I do and how I can help them in that.

• Speaker #1

  Go for it.

• Speaker #0

  Okay. Um, so, so yeah, as, as I said, uh, there are 12 pillars to, uh, to my coaching process and that, um, so, uh, each, each pillar kind of leads into the next pillar. And the next pillar builds on to the last pillar. So it's really about, you know, I think most coaches, in my experience anyways, most coaches, what they do is they help a person like maybe set goals, you know, of what they want to do, what they want to accomplish. and that whereas I'm really more focused on helping you release the low vibration emotions, helping you rewire your mind. And I prefer the word converge, to converge with your authentic self. And that because we don't become our authentic selves because, you know, our authentic selves are part of us. So we converge with our authentic self and that by releasing those low vibration emotions. And then from there, we can step into our purpose. So, you know, as I said, I do a lot of what I call in spiritual terms kind of, it's called shadow work. And that, so it can be like, you know, meditation. It can be different things. And that just to help a person kind of, you know, get in touch with their subconscious mind. like Like, what am I really feeling? So, yeah, people can look specifically at what my 12 pillars are and define them or how they're defined on my website, on the My Blueprint page. So, DivineSoulSanctum.com, My Blueprint. So, yeah.

• Speaker #1

  I've been a fan in the past. of the idea of like 12-step programs. Right. I used to work in the substance abuse recovery space some too. And what I always said was part of the beauty in it is The steps are so manageable. I mean, they're big, but also they're manageable. If I wrote them, it'd be like five steps, but how separated out. And so I do wonder as I'm listening to this, how much where you're describing the connection from pillar to pillar, how beneficial that actually is because it's, they're not standalone and broken down. I just wonder how much more manageable of a process that is as someone that sounds like very fluid goes through that. That really jumped out to me. So, yeah, I appreciate you sharing that.

• Speaker #0

  Absolutely.

• Speaker #1

  As we wrap up here, trying to mindful a little bit of time here. I'm not always the best at that, but I'm on it today. For folks that are hearing you, they're like, wait, I do want to learn more. I do want to connect more. How can people find you?

• Speaker #0

  Well, my website, again, is DivineSoulSanctum.com. So you can go there and you can see my website and you can email me at eric at divine soul sanctum dot com. But Eric is E-R-I-C-K. So don't forget that. So, yeah. And then I'm on I'm on social media, you know, on X on Facebook, on LinkedIn as Divine Soul Sanctum on Instagram as Divine Soul. Soul Sanctum. So I'm not that difficult to find. And yeah, just reach out.

• Speaker #1

  And certainly all those will be linked in the show notes. So people better track you down. It's by checking there. So, but Eric, I really appreciate you being here and sharing with us. Yeah, just willing us to. So thank you.

• Speaker #0

  Yeah, thank you, Sam. I really appreciate it. Thank you for giving me the space. I do.

• Speaker #1

  And for everybody, thanks for listening to Nerd Average Spot. I am Sam Marion. If you enjoyed today's episode, I hope that you'll give a like or subscribe. If you know somebody who could benefit from hearing Eric share, may benefit from connecting, please share the episode with them directly. That may go a long way. You can find me online on Instagram at Nerd Average Spot. You can find me anywhere else directly from there. So thanks for being here.