Speaker #0the psychology behind Galene Maxwell, the ultimate pick me, respectfully. Let's talk about it. So when I was doing my research for this episode, I had to take a really, really, really deep dive because something my clients were asking me and I myself was like, what would lead someone to do this? What would make someone feel so deprived of love? or to stem from that space, that they need to have somebody else do a job in order to be accepted by somebody. And when we think of that, we think of the dynamic of power, grooming, trauma bonds, and why she stayed. This is a behavior that has been reinforced from her beginning. And when you do your research on Galen, you will see that... it makes perfect sense why she would become a pick me. And for those of you that don't know what a pick me is, it's one of those people that's just so desperate, respectfully, for attention, longing, belonging, that they will do things that maybe they don't feel comfortable with, but they know that it's gonna help keep that person and keep that bond with that person that they want to have a bond with. It's kind of like when you hear someone say that they were the other person, but you know, you don't understand what they were going through. And while there are times that that can be true, if that person really wanted to be divorced or had left, they would have done it. And if they were truly loved and wanted to just be with one person. then they needed to be themselves wholeheartedly and maybe not do things that they felt the need to then have to escape from because they didn't feel comfortable in their own nervous system. In my last episode, I talked about cognitive dissonance and you have to be in a state of cognitive dissonance to do this. And like I mentioned, this programming starts from a very young age. And what we know about Dylan is that her dad was Robert Maxwell, the Robert Maxwell. Robert Maxwell was a Ukrainian-born man who then became an English aristocrat. He was the social and publishing tycoon of that time. He is also someone who had to morph into the identity that he was in present day. And because of how he where he came from, he then held a certain dynamic in his home, which then led to Galen doing another thing. And much like how I'm explaining that, that's how all of us attain what we call programming. So it's kind of what we know to the world, what we know to be like, and how we register. This is how dynamics work. So for example, In the context of Gillen, her dad was someone who survived the Holocaust and lost a lot of his family members in it. He became a global media tycoon. And he didn't do this by being nice. He did it by being incredibly intelligent. He knew nine languages and at one point even fought for the British Army. That was a part of it. And that is how he was able to grow through the mark and end up meeting Gillen's mom. Her mom, much like Dylan, was the heiress and socialite. And Robert was able to social climb through his wife. Do we see the parallels between mom and daughter? And this replicates in a lot of our dynamics. Not to this extent, but just think of that as an example. How sometimes we become our parent, consciously or not. So, Robert... starts going through the ranks, becomes very financially powerful, and has nine children. He is also notoriously known for publicly cheating on his wife. He's known for being very charismatic, but also very domineering. People in his industry feared him and feared having any sort of confrontation with him. This is important. because it also leads to how image obsessed he was. Everything in their life had to be perfect. And when Galen came around as child number nine, she was kind of forgotten about. And even her mom in her own autobiography wrote that at one point Galen at four years old was like, mom, I'm here. She didn't feel seen. To also add to this timeline, her brother, who was the oldest and pretty much the golden child. had a car accident when around the time Gillen was a baby and ended up being in a coma for many years and passed away. So there was always this, in my opinion, and how I would see it through a trauma lens is I need to be good enough and I need to be this gold person, the golden child now, because my brother isn't here. And I know for sure I will then get attention because my other siblings get attention and I don't. And now as a parent, her parents were probably really tired, or at least her mom was. They had such a crazy amount of wealth also at that age, also in her youth. She lived in a 56 or 57 room mansion in England, which is insane. She was very well educated, also went up through the ranks of being a socialite in her own right, and graduated from Oxford, where she had a friend. named Prince Andrew. Dad also had ties with the British family and were very much involved with being in all their parties and being very, you know, friendly in that regard. The important thing of highlighting all of that is that Ghislaine at a very young age learned that love is not only conditional, but that It really is tied to status because without that, you have nothing and you will do things to keep it there. So like the Gen Zers say, the lore, the Maxwell family lore is that Robert Maxwell was not really good with his finances. He lived way above his needs. But what have you done for me lately is kind of like the. the exchange that he seemed to have. Again, another parallel. There's a power dynamic there. I'm able to give you access to these people. I'm able to do this. And outside of the shady business stuff that he would do. So with regard to dad and the dynamic of him and how his family got him to where he is, I want you to take note of stuff. So upon this happening, and it's important that I give you this context because it's going to explain some of the parallels that we're seeing replay in dynamics. And I want you to take a pause. Think of how that applies to you. It's kind of like when you date the same type of person and you're like, I don't know why I keep dating these type of guys or these type of girls or these type of people. It's like, well, there's a pattern there. And there's something that your nervous system feels safe with because it's all it's known. And. This dynamic of feeling like you need to have your love be earned and tied to your social standing because your image has to be immaculate and perfect, lends for predatory-like interactions. Because secrets and cognitive dissonance, we know that's amongst there. Especially if we don't want to lose our social standing. Something that Galen's dad was known for. was not only praising her for the body that she had and how eloquent she was, but she was effectively his arm candy. They went out together more than him and his wife. So there was that element also of having to be the person on the shoulder and the prettiest woman in the room. And that insecurity that if somebody else is there, how does that play out? Her dad was also known for being very flirtatious with her. friends of hers and friends of other people and as i've mentioned before also known for being a cheater because he could be he was the man of the house and that was just the dynamic that they had there how does that interplay or parallel the situation that she found herself in after her dad passed so what happened dad goes out on his yacht the lady galen super massive yacht by the the way he is broke he is beyond broke he has stolen over 30 000 employees retirement funds So imagine working all of your life loyal, loyal to a company, putting money in and you're told, yeah, just kidding. We didn't invest. There's actually nothing there. That was such an unprecedented thing that occurred there that they had to pass a law so that it could never happen again. Another parallel, a gross injustice to multiple victims. and being with someone of that caliber. Maybe Freud was right. He announced something. Another thing we know about Galen is that she grew up in an environment where her dad was described as tyrannical. Another thing we know about Galen is that she was raised in an environment where her dad was very possessive and in control, very alpha. He was known for having the kids. wait to eat until he got home and he would ask them about their day and if he didn't like what they what they did or didn't feel like they were productive he would effectively roast them and like make them feel awful about themselves and not only that he would then make them apologize to him with a written letter so imagine thinking and how much that kind of silences you right like if you know that if you make a mistake i have to be perfect that's an EMDR negative cognition. If you think of that, like that's a trauma response, I have to be perfect. That means that you were taught that. So that type of environment fosters what we call an insecure attachment or a disorganized attachment, which means you could then be very susceptible to what happened to her because you think that you and your worth is based off of your productivity and what you can produce. and that you are only worthy of that if you produce something to them. And that is why this is terrifying, because on a much minor level, how many of us know somebody like that or have been that person where you feel or were made to feel like your productivity was what made you worthy of love and belonging, our fundamental human right? I don't feel worthy. So then you're going to do things like that. And I called Gillen a pick me and I still stand by it because she is the ultimate pick me. That is now in our realm of possibility of picking. And if you've ever been one and you're not that anymore, we have to hold space for someone like that and just understand that this was something that they. developed and learned through and they still made active choices for years that respectfully given what i have read i could totally see in my professional opinion completely fragmenting someone to their very essence and no one has that right no one does i don't care what you've gone gone through, respectively. So explaining it, I want to make sure I say this, does not excuse it. But that's important to me. And while one could argue that she too was a survivor of this, she likely was. We tend to repeat patterns that we see. And we also know that not only was she arm candy, but there were many documented sleepovers that took place. So I'm sure that that was done to her as well. I would say that that is a strong hypothesis that I hold, given my research. And what the data does show. That we tend to repeat the same things unless they're broken down. So what happens is that her dad steals all this money and goes out on a boat and then is found. Very mysterious. No one knows anything. And all of a sudden, every single tabloid and news thing over in London, where they were living, has pretty much disseminated this name. So what does she do? She goes and she leaves to New York. And a few weeks or months into being in New York, she meets Jeffrey, a young, charming, handsome guy that... She thinks, man, this guy has money. He can help protect me because. He is larger than life, much like her dad. He is very alluring and enigmatic, much like her dad. He very much domineers and takes control, much like her dad. We tend to date a lot of the qualities that we pick in a partner, depending if it's healthy or unhealthy, we'll find one of our parents in them. And that's data across the board. So this is important. Because what she saw in Jeffrey was something that her nervous system recognized and she felt was safe. And that's why people tend to make this sort of mistake over and over again, because it's literally all we've known. It's kind of like when you're finally doing the healing and you almost want to not have the other shoe drop. That's how I liken it. So because we don't want the other shoe to drop, we may self-sabotage. We may, you know, not find it normal because having a regulated nervous system is not normal for us. We've never known that, especially if we always have to be perfect. We always have to be image obsessed or how we present obsessed and status. And now more than ever, this is someone who's always been rich. She is lucky that the Internet did not exist at that time. She was able to social climb through all her connections because she was a very eloquent and educated and connected woman. And she was able to social climb. And the news of what happened over there probably didn't make it here for a bit. And after a while, it was already probably months had already passed or time had passed and people were, you know, 15 minutes and then it's gone. And then we forget that it's by design. Her and Jeffrey get together. And once this occurs, within a few years, they have their first documented clients or victims and survivors. And seeing their story and how brave they were was one of those moments of every time I hear it, I think of the time when they did that and how women were just not respected. And that's such a thing to say now in 2026. But there was a time where I remembered that as a child. And they did that. They went and they told their story. They own their truth. And they didn't care that this person was Jeffrey Epstein. He did something to me. He violated me. And nothing was done for a bit. As this continues to happen. We then have Virginia Buffray, who unfortunately was another survivor that championed and owned her story and went out and said stuff. She was smart enough to bring a disposable camera and take a picture with Prince Andrew as evidence. She knew she was going to escape. And so she did that to have some sort of collateral to be like, this did happen. I was this age at this time. And thank God she was able to do that. Because at the end of this, I think no matter what party line you're in, we protect kids. That's a baseline. And we do not want anybody doing anything to a child, to a vulnerable mind. We don't want that. I don't care what party line you're in. I think we can both agree on that. So now that we know how Ghislaine began and what possibly influenced her into engaging in the behaviors and actions that they did. So I want to take a moment and check in. Something that I got to thinking about as I was doing this research for the episode was something I call ghost rules. And ghost rules are systematic or social rules that we have around us. And one of the things that I think is important to highlight in this is that when we are shaped by our by significant programming that took place in our childhood, we need to ask ourselves, how does that make us the person we are today? Because if you think about it, our parents were growing up with us, right? Like we were not independent of that, but and they likely did do the best they could, given what they did know. And you still feel how you feel. and it may have still impacted you in some way. And that is okay, number one, to acknowledge and to own. But one of the things that I thought about was how do ghost rules apply in this sort of ecosystem that Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell created? And if you are programmed to want to have high status, you are likely going to allow more. You are likely going to have rules of what is forbidden. Kind of like we don't talk about Bruno. in a much more intense way. What was ignored? What was normalized? Every family and community has those rules. Rules that everybody kind of has to follow. And one of the things that I think about with this and I actually wrote down was we don't question powerful people. We protect our own. We do not embarrass the family. And we don't talk about that. And those rules shape our morality and how we show up. So when anything threatens that, we are going to try to protect it. And your brain is going to try to do that. So it's going to tell you, hey, this is almost done. And that's something that you'll see a lot of the survivors say, like, all right, if I could just, you know, just kind of like zone out and not think. When they're saying that, they're saying, I'm going to go dissociate. And they're having what we call an outer body. experience because what's going on in the present is too much for the nervous system to want to register and when we have that there is a trauma truth that we all hold and the brain hides information from itself to survive because if not it's going to stop us and we're going to engage and fight right freeze or fawn and our amygdala is going off But when we don't talk about it, the body remembers because it's stored in our hippocampus. And as this occurs, even though we may not emotionally attune to it all the time, it will remember when something familiar, a smell, an action, a phrase. And it's just a felt sense that if you know what I'm talking about and have actually been mindful with it. It's scary. Nobody wants to think about that. But if you have so much on the line and there's so much even fear of this person and what they could do to you and the fact that they may or may not have blackmail on you because you've likely trusted them and told them things because we as humans are meaning makers and want to connect. And this is where that coercion begins. I want to ask you a question. What was a ghost rule in your family? I'll go first. And this is a little controversial, but I'm going to say it. And it's something that I thankfully do not subscribe to. But growing up, I am Cuban Puerto Rican. And as you can tell, I am brown, meaning I somewhere in me have African. And I do because I'm Cuban and Puerto Rican. And if you know anything about those histories, I most definitely have African in me in some capacity. And according to 23andMe, it's like 33%. So it's valid. But something that I was told growing up was, Tenemos que adelantar la raza. Which means, no, we have to progress. Like you have to be with someone white. You can't be with someone like us or darker. So what does that lead me to think? well there's clearly something wrong with me because we have to lighten me up and that's something that was a ghost rule that was if i brought someone that was darker than me it was a problem and respectfully with my dad not so much my mom that was social programming that he had with his belief and that's a truth of having to own that and thankfully Now, I have not only a brown child, but a white child. And they're both perfect and beautiful in the skin that they're in. And I love that about them. I also love that now there are, you know, toys and dolls that are representative of us. And that look like me and my kids. And I think that's really important to talk about. I want you to ask yourself what was never allowed around you. or if you were allowed to even be friends with people from certain places. or and I mean even like certain schools because there was you know whatever belief about that school and if you have felt any discomfort with any of the questions I just asked I want you to take pause and just get curious to that and see if there is truth to that because when we ground ourselves in truth we just know how to operate and to do better And in my case, I love that I now have two children that look very different. One of them, respectfully, I even look like their nanny. But it's a joke that we have, but it's rooted in reality. My son is white with green eyes. And my other son looks just like me. Literally, he is my mini-me. And I love that I have two kids that look like that. And I love them. in how they are and i love my friends kids and i love that we all now have things that are representative of ours so if we have that information and that did happen with us what are we doing now differently than what we knew because that's the point of us right doing better than the people from before and stopping the deep or deprogramming ourselves is with clocking the cycle noticing I don't like what that felt sense was. I don't ever want to be labeled as X, that I never want to be associated with that. I'm a good person going back to a value-driven life. But that's how we can begin deprogramming. And that's going to be a video in and of itself. So watch out for that in the next few weeks. One of the things that stood out to me the most while I was doing this research as well was what... would lead someone to do this and why and when I got to thinking about it I was like okay well we have the foundation of not feeling good enough having everything to do with how we appear socially and status and money and power and control especially when we feel like we don't have control and this was a Thank you. in my opinion, display of a cycle continuing out of fear of losing Jeffrey. Something that I found really interesting was at one point, Jeffrey and Ghislaine were a boyfriend and girlfriend, and she moved into the Palm Beach house, and there was a lady of the house per people that worked there. One of the things I found really interesting was that once they broke up, and they were quote-unquote best friends, She's still engaged in all the things. And respectfully, I want you to take, this is where I'm going to come in with some loving big sister advice. Let this be a masterclass in what we don't do ever for anybody. Anybody that we are with that takes us out of our own personal values or ethics is not worth it. I don't care how. lonely you are. I promise you. I don't make promises that I can't keep, but being with someone like that can make you that. I've seen it with my own eyes. As I was doing this research, I thought about someone that used to be in my life and I feel so sorry for her. And it's still a choice at this point, but we've all have warned her. And in her case, her abuse is more financial versus this that escalated to what it is that we know it to be today. And we never want to compromise ourselves. We are all we've got. And love and belonging is all of our birthrights. And someone that loves you won't make you do that ever or abuse you. or make you feel less than and take advantage of that weakness and that stuff that all of us have right like i know i have felt like i wasn't good enough to be with someone i know i've compromised myself and it's not my proudest moment but i never repeated that cycle again because i also didn't like what that felt and i also learned to respect myself galen did not respect herself galen ended of getting In this... crazy last will that jeffrey uh like completed two days before his passing um and left his current girlfriend a whole dynasty and left galen with like 10 million dollars would you imagine doing everything you did for a guy to be left for someone younger respectfully prettier sorry and you did all that and now you're in prison that's what being a pick me is they will never pick you pick somebody that picks you respectfully so that is my analysis holy shit um it was i'm not gonna lie very triggering uh doing this research i had to take a lot of of measures to help myself ground myself. As I mentioned, I'm a survivor of abuse and, um, a lot of these recounts brought back even my own kind of trauma, back to the surface. And I've done a lot of therapy. So I'm going to remind you that this kind of content, you kind of need to dose and see how it's impacting you. Because I'll give you an example. I was talking to somebody and all they were doing was like, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday, Sunday. And I was just like, dude, this is so, it's nonstop. Like it's literally all I'm talking about in sessions. Like my clients are bringing it up because it's just so crazy. And I want to remind you that you are allowed to like take it in supplements. Like you don't have to have it all there or consume it all. You can pace yourself, ground yourself, and practice ways of remembering not only that you're present, in your body and in your space today and safe, but that you're calling your energy back. Because that's the thing. This type of story is going to siphon a lot of your personal energy. And you need to be mindful of that and what you're intaking of it. So I hope you're practicing some self-care and any sort of information that is coming up for you. I know it's a little easier said than done, but please have some curiosity and empathy with yourself. you probably did the best that you could with the programming that you had and what you were taught. And let us all always remember that minors can never consent. Let's just please be grounded in that, in our basic humanity. I'm Coral Cycle, and this is The Road Leads Back to Me. And thank you for having this very difficult and blunt conversation with me. I'll see you next time. Take care.
