Speaker #0Have you ever kept a promise to yourself about your creativity? If so, what made it stick? Today I'm going to tell you about a promise that I made to myself that I actually kept. The three rules to make a creative promise stick and a challenge to you to help you unleash your inner creative in November. Welcome to Unleash Your Inner Creative. My name is Lauren LaGrasso. I'm your host. I'm an award-winning podcast host and producer, singer-songwriter, public speaker, and creative coach. And this show is meant to give you tools to claim your birthright to creativity and love, trust, and know yourself enough to go after whatever it is that's on your heart. Today, I am talking about a creative promise that I made to myself in October and that I kept. And that promise is, if you've been listening, maybe it won't be a surprise, but I started my sub stack right in the nick of time. I did it last week. I think it was on October 30th. that I launched it, but I did it. I said I was going to start it in October. After three years of waiting, I did it. And honestly, it felt great. I wrote about something you've heard me discuss on the show a lot, which is the art of being bad at something. Basically, it's a way of thinking and being when you start something new as an adult that I believe we all must engage with. And it's a super important topic for any creative because If you can't remember this, it's really hard to start a new creative project, like writing a sub stack. And so it was as much advice to me as it was to you in my writing. Before I go any deeper into that, I do want to go through why I think this promise worked, because I was thinking about it. And you know, I've made a lot of commitments on the show. I've said I was going to do things that I didn't end up doing in my creative career. Like I remember at one point I was like, I'm going to start posting more cover songs of me singing. And I didn't end up doing it. And so I was thinking about why was it that this one finally stuck and I was able to make good on. And I came to three different things that I think worked better with this than other commitments I've either made on the show or even to myself or to a friend. And they are as follows. The number one reason why this creative project worked and happened out in the world is because it was timeframe specific. So instead of being like, I really want to start. doing X. I said, in the month of October, I am going to launch my sub stack. That level of specificity with what I wanted to do and also when I wanted to do it made it so that I was kind of like writing a contract with myself, with you and with the universe that I was going to do this thing. When you make a promise that's more nebulous, it's much harder to achieve because starting could mean doing it anytime. It could mean any number of things. So knowing exactly what you want to promise yourself and in what timeframe is really important. Number two, it was a public declaration. So saying it on the podcast, giving you the timeframe, you kind of held me accountable, you the listener, and it made it a lot more likely to happen because I'm like, if I don't do this, everyone's going to know. And while yes, like a lot of people wouldn't care or might not notice, I would have just felt awkward coming back week after week. not having done the thing, the exact thing that I said I was going to do. Number three, and I think this is the most important part. It was a promise, not a commitment. On the show, I've committed to a lot of things. Now, I believe when it comes to words and things we're doing, connotation matters as much as denotation. In other words, the energy and the feeling behind something matters a lot. A commitment has a very different emotion to it than a promise. To me, a commitment is an obligation. It's something that you have to do. A promise is a vow. It's a devotion. It's much more soulful and spiritual. And the word resonates with me. So I think even in the word you use around whatever thing it is that you're intending to do, That energy matters because for me, commitment made me feel like, Ooh, like I don't like my commitments, my commitments promise felt expansive, like creativity felt. So again, those three things that I think made this work was I was timeframe specific and also very specific with what my creative promise was to, it was a public declaration and three, it was a promise, not a commitment. And that word holds. a more expansive connotation and energy for me. So those are the three things that made it work. Like I mentioned, the article is all about the art of being bad at something. And it is something I speak about in my keynote, something I've talked about a lot in the podcast, but something that's also very difficult to remember because when you start something new, like anything, you want to be good at it right away. And if you're not, it can feel really bad. But it's about remembering that that's exactly where you're supposed to be. And I take you through my own journey, how I came to remember it. how it helped me finally write this sub stack after three years of putting it off, and how you can use it in your own journey and commit to yourself. So I'm asking you again, it's now the month of November, what is it that you would like to commit to yourself this month when it comes to your creative life? What I want you to do is come up with that thing and make it very specific. So as specific as I am going to start my sub stack. Then, Make it timeframe specific. So for you, whatever the thing is, I'm going to blank in the month of November. Then the second part is making a public declaration. Now this public declaration does not need to be on the level of like going out to your podcast listeners. It can just be to a group of friends or to your family, but it should be with a group of people that can hold you accountable. And where if you don't do it, like they're going to know, you're going to know, and eventually you're going to have to confront it. And the third part is Use a word that makes sense to you. If promise doesn't feel expansive to you like it does to me, find a different word. Maybe it's a vow. Maybe it's an agreement. Whatever it is, find a word that resonates, that doesn't feel like it's holding you down. For me, commitment felt like constrictive. So promise was much more expansive to me. So you find a word that aligns with the energy you want to bring to this thing. And I wanted to share something with you. For my Substack, I'm not just writing, I'm also doing an audio version of each article, at least for now. So what you're about to hear is the audio version of my new Substack article, Beginner's Mindset, Embrace the Art of Being Bad at Something. If you like what you hear, go ahead and go to my Substack. I'm gonna put a link in the show notes. Also, if you'd rather just type it in, it's just substack.com slash at Lauren LaGrasso. And you can find everything there. You can subscribe, you can follow, you can leave a comment. That means so much and really helps. You can repost it or they call it restacking it and share it with a friend like anything else. I really think the best communities are built person to person and it would mean so much to me if you would take a moment to read it, share it with a friend who you think it might help and spread the word. And by the time you listen to this, there should be a new article up there too. So you'll have another one to go check out. right after you listen to this. Thank you so much for supporting me. I support you too. I can't wait to see what you create this November. What kind of a vow you will make to yourself. I promise you it will be worth it. I feel so proud of myself right now. And I know you're going to feel so proud of yourself when you do that. I love you. And I believe in you. Now here's my Substack article. Beginner's Mindset. Embrace the art of being bad at something. Why starting messy might be the most creative thing you can do, by Lauren LaGrasso. We must embrace the art of being bad at something. This means, when trying something new, it's important to surrender to the mess, the newness, and all the not knowing that comes along with it. Once you can surrender to being bad, and only then, can you begin your path to greatness. This process is the natural way of things. just as babies crawl before they walk. walk before they run, and fall a lot along the way, we must too, both in creativity and in life. I know that this is true with every fiber of my being. This is the advice I give all the time on my podcast, Unleash Your Inner Creative, and in every keynote speech I do. I've seen it play out in my own career and the creativity and careers of everyone I coach and produce, yet it's something I still struggle with and have a hard time remembering every time I level up or try something new. Why? I believe we teach what we most need to learn. I mean, who better to teach it than somebody who has won each lesson through their own gory trials? We don't need prodigies teaching things like just do it when whatever it is comes naturally to them. What advice could they truly give when their understanding is mostly innate? Still, it does feel bad, LOL, to continue to have to learn that lesson. But rather than shame myself for it, I would like to share my journey. My human design says that the best way for me to teach is through sharing my own mistakes and learnings. So here we go, my babes. This idea of the art of being bad at something first came to me when I was learning guitar at 22 years old. A friend of mine told me, you're going to love playing, just commit to being bad for a year. Of course, when I heard that, I immediately rejected the idea. Me? Bad? No, no, no. I was going to be the next Jimi Hendrix, clearly. I, Lauren LaGrasso, was immune to this ridiculous advice. However, her. At that moment, I started looking back on my history with guitar. I had already attempted to play guitar three separate times over the course of my high school and college years. Each time I gave up. Why? Because I just couldn't get it. I sucked and it hurt. I was muting the strings, having a hard time transitioning from chord to chord, and I couldn't possibly begin to play a full song. Frustrated, each time I gave up. And remembering this, it dawned on me that maybe he was right. So when I picked up the guitar again later that year, I kept it in mind that starting out is supposed to feel bad and that the only way to get better is to keep practicing. Guitar is a particularly interesting and helpful example of this because in order to become a great guitar player, you literally have to build up calluses. You can't do that if you, with your smooth little inexperienced fingers, expect to be Prince on day one. So I committed to try. through the pain of being bad. And guess what happened? I stayed. I played. And eventually, about a year and a half in, I got better. By year two, I was so good I could play on stage. By year three, I felt confident enough to accompany myself all alone. And now, I fully consider myself a guitar player. I always accompany myself on stage, have played guitar on all my recent music releases, and I've even been paid to teach guitar to kids. But here's a rub. None of that would have happened if I had given up because it hurts so deeply to have such a wide distance between my abilities and desire for greatness when I first began. Even though we know the normal progression of gaining skills and talents, it is so easy to forget the art of being bad at something as an adult. This happens for two reasons. Number one, we have really good taste in the new thing we're starting. So for me with guitar, I knew what good guitar playing sounded like. And the distance between the sounds I wanted and the sounds I was creating was kind of unbearable. And number two, we're highly skilled at the things we already do well. So unlike when you're a child and trying, and let's be honest, sucking at new things every day, but not realizing it because you're kind of equally bad at everything, by the time we're adults and try something new, we know what it is like to be amazing at something. So again, The distance between our other skill sets and the lack of skill in our new endeavor feels horrible and even disgraceful, even though it's exactly as it should be. So I know all of this is true. And I've had real life experience many times over, and it's still hard to remember as I level up. I once heard Jensen Charo, author of You Are a Badass, say, new level, new devil. And I really believe that's true. We get endless opportunities to learn our greatest lessons in bigger ways throughout the course of our journey. So here I am again with a beginner's mind, relearning the art of being bad at something through this, through writing like this. I'm out of practice with this type of writing. I did it a lot as a kid. And when I was in my early twenties, I even had a short lived blog called the wobbly times that chronicled being a woman in her twenties, living alone in a new city, Los Angeles, pursuing a life of art. and creativity. I absolutely loved that type of writing and it was a real outlet for me. But when my music career started picking up and I discovered songwriting, I left this type of writing behind. It wasn't that I didn't love it. It was just that I had never anticipated that I could actually be a songwriter. So when my first song flew out of me at 23, I followed that path hard. However, ever since then, I have felt a void for this type of free flow writing. I always say creativity begets creativity. And as I'm thinking about it, writing my old blog led me to creating one of my very first and favorite songs I've ever written called Lonely City. The song was based on a blog I've written about the loneliness of living in LA. Wow. Just realizing that as I write here. Anyway, I did find this kind of writing that I'm doing now easier when I was young. Maybe it's because I was in the practice of it. Maybe it's because there was less shit pulling my attention back then. Maybe it's because my Sanders weren't as high. Or maybe it was just because my brain wasn't fully developed, LOL. Oh, to be 22 again. I really don't know. But whatever the reason, I'm attempting through this endeavor to get back to that creative flow and beginner's mindset. Here's the truth. I don't feel like I know what I'm doing. I'm not sure if I'm still good at this. I know for sure I'm far from perfect, but I also know that I've been feeling called to write in this way for a while now and ignoring that call because perfectionism had me in a chokehold. Case in point, back in 2022, I wrote a post here that said, substack coming soon. I guess soon is relative. I mean, in the history of all life on this planet, three years is but a blip, but I definitely don't think that waiting three years is what I meant when I wrote that. I really felt like if I didn't have the perfect idea, the perfect style, the brand message of whatever the sub stack will be, that I didn't have a right to start. Today, I'm throwing those thoughts away and embracing the art of being bad at something. Why? Well, number one, because I promised my podcast listeners I'd finally publish my first article this October, and I believe in keeping my promises. And two, I'm taking my own advice on how to effectively start a creative project. To start before it's perfect. Start when you feel called. I don't know what this is supposed to be. I only know I feel called to write and share my learnings with you. I wish that we could all remember that we don't have to have an idea fully cooked before we share it, especially if our goal in that moment is just to share and help a little. For God's sake, it's not like I'm some fancy startup that raised a hundred million dollars and now needs to have a perfect launch to appease investors. I am my investor. I give myself permission to try to be imperfect. to be bad even, and to keep getting better, evolving, and iterating until I reach what this is for both you and me. And then after that, I give myself permission to complete the same process of growth again and again and again. So here's my question to you. What do you need to do this for in your creative career or path? What have you been feeling called to do but waiting to try until you or the idea or both were quote unquote perfect? Can you drop the chains of needing to be perfect or brilliant and embrace being authentic, excited, and trying? Today I'm doing that. So what is my commitment to you? To show up here imperfectly. I don't know what this is going to be yet. Probably one part personal blog, one part advice on creativity and life, and one part just sharing things I find beautiful or important out in the world. Or maybe it won't be any of those things. I am giving myself permission to show up here and figure out what it is along the way. Because the truth is this, sometimes we have to answer the creative call before we know where it is leading us, to follow the spark and to share the process. When we do, it helps us and others remember that you don't have to have everything figured out to start. Passion, persistence, and raw talent are enough to try. So here I am. Thanks for following the journey. Join me in embracing the art of being bad at something today. Write what you're going to try in the comments. I love you and I believe in you. Love, Lauren. And here's my little footnote. Human design is a system of self-knowledge that blends astrology, the I Ching, the Kabbalah, and modern physics to provide a unique blueprint for how an individual operates. It offers insights into a person's natural talents, how they make decisions, their energy type, and purpose in life.
