❤️‍🩹My Wake Up Call: How to Calm Your Nervous System, Release Stress & Embrace Change | Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

Description

Have you ever realized… you might be the one making everything harder than it needs to be? In this episode, the tables are turned. I’m the one being interviewed by nervous system expert and returning guest Nahid de Belgeonne and what came out of this conversation was very refreshing, so I wanted to share it with you!

We talk about stress, burnout, codependency, and the moment I realized I was taking on everyone else’s “emergencies” as my own. I share what happened when my body forced me to slow down (in a very real way), and how I’ve started to finally calm my nervous system instead of living in overwhelm.

We also get into:

Why high achievers struggle to metabolize stress
The “second arrow of suffering” and how we make things worse than they are
How to stop absorbing other people’s energy and emotions
My new morning routine for regulating my nervous system
Pregnancy, ambition, and learning to actually take care of myself
What it really looks like to step into a new chapter of your life (for me entrepreneurship and Motherhood)

This conversation is honest, grounding, and deeply human. If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or like life has been heavier than it needs to be… this one is for you.

You can connect with Nahid and learn more about her work: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/

Check out her retreat in Greece: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/thesootheweekinlefkadagreece

Check out my Substack: https://substack.com/@laurenlograsso

🎙️ Connect & Work with Me:
If you love this episode and want personalized support to break through creative blocks, build confidence, and finally share your work with the world, I’d love to help. As a creative coach, I work with artists, entrepreneurs, and multi-passionate creatives to unleash their inner voice and build a thriving creative life from a place of self-love.

✨ Want to work together? Email me at Lauren.LoGrasso@gmail.com or visit https://www.laurenlograsso.com/contact/ to book a free 15-minute discovery call.

Remember to subscribe/follow the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or wherever you get your pods. Please leave us a rating and review- it helps SO much in getting the show out there. And tell a friend about the show- podcasts are very personal and tend to be spread person to person. If this show helped you or made you smile, share the love :)

Follow the show: @unleashyourinnercreative

Follow me: @LaurenLoGrasso

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Transcription

Speaker #0
Hello, my sweet creative cutie. I hope you're doing well today. I have a special treat for you on today's show. I'm doing something a little different than I normally do. So last week, I had the pleasure of sitting down with friend of the show and past Unleash Your Inner Creative guest, Nahid De Beljon. And Nahid is an expert in nervous system soothing. She wrote an incredible book called Soothe. You should definitely go back and check out our episode together. But this past week... I had her interview me. The tables were turned. And it was such a beautiful, heartfelt, insightful conversation that after we wrapped, I felt compelled to reach out to her and say, hey, would you be okay with me sharing that with my listeners? It was just really honest, a lot of good takeaways. It was a breath of fresh air, honestly. Like, it's wonderful to be able to just drop in with someone and talk heart to heart, and especially about difficult things and... creative things and things revolving around self-development and career and all of that. So I am going to share that with you today. So this is from the Substack Live we did last Thursday, a week ago today, and I think you're going to love it. We get into my career, what I am trying to do in the next phase of my life, going into entrepreneurship, how I'm feeling about motherhood, how I'm now looking at stress and rest, and And... It's really just a great chat. She's delightful. Just listening to her voice makes me feel calmer. And I know that it will do the same for you. Yeah. I just think it brings out like me being with her brought out really interesting textures and my personality and great things that I know you're going to get a lot out of. So I'm excited for you to listen to it. Also, if you feel like you also get a sense of calm just from listening to Nahid, just imagine working with her. She is so incredible and she's doing this retreat I wanted to tell you about. She's got three spaces left on her June 27th through July 4th retreat. It's in Greece. So if you're looking for a little European getaway and to learn how to soothe your nervous system, what could be better? Literally, what could be better? Go ahead and check that out. I'm going to put the link in the show notes. So go soothe yourself with Nahid. But before you do that, listen to this incredible conversation. And have a great rest of your week.
Speaker #1
Welcome to this chat with me today. Thanks for joining me all the way from LA.
Speaker #0
Oh, thank you for having me. Happy to be here. From anywhere.
Speaker #1
So let me just go through all the things that you've done. You're a podcasting, You're a world's traveler across podcasting, creative coaching. And you have an... Webby award-winning podcast Unleash Your Inner Creative, which you were very kind to invite me to. Tell us a little bit about how we find you today. What's on your mind?
Speaker #0
Well, that's a great question. I have a lot of things on my mind all the time at once, but I would say the biggest takeaway from this week is I have realized the past couple weeks, I have not been metabolizing stress very well. And so the past two and a half days, I've changed my approach and it has worked.
Speaker #1
And what were you doing before and what are you doing now?
Speaker #0
Before I was just letting every stressor just take me on a journey and not really being thoughtful about it or realizing like, you know, I've heard someone say recently emergencies usually have ambulances. And I was letting other people's... perceived emergencies become my own and just go on the whole journey and taking too much responsibility for other people's mistakes. Or even if you're in a leadership role, like I do think you have to obviously be accountable if the team isn't working as well as you want. But taking what is your part and leaving the rest on the table, I think is important to de-stressing and living well.
Speaker #1
So important. And it's something I often talk to my clients about. They're often really responsible and... With that responsibility also comes this idea that everyone else is an idiot and they can't do things as well as them. So they don't let go of things. And whenever they do ask other people to do things, they want it done to their standards. I'm like, it doesn't matter. Let it go. You know, that's kind of setting yourself up to fail and to be overwhelmed with responsibility for the world. You just can't possibly hold it all. So let people do it. things their way and don't be so fussed about it. You know, don't worry so much about the outcome because it's going to be okay. You know, you don't have to be responsible for everyone.
Speaker #0
Yeah. And you can't be, and honestly, frankly, you shouldn't be like, you know, people need to make their own mistakes and live their own lives. And yeah, I would say I've definitely struggled with codependency over the course of my life. And over the past couple of weeks, I've had, I've fallen back into some of my own ways, old ways. And I had a wake up call cause you know, I'm pregnant. And on Wednesday, I woke up, you know, after a stressful night and I, or it's Tuesday. And I was spotting and it was like, I don't think it was attached, but it was an important wake up call literally from my body, from my baby being like, Hey, it's not that deep. Take a breath, take care of yourself, take care of me. And thankfully by the end of the night, I did end up going to the hospital by the end of the night, it had gone away. The baby was fine. The heartbeat was strong, all that stuff. But it was like, I, unfortunately I needed that wake up call for me to realize, Oh, I have been making things way bigger and harder than they need to be. Like if you need to deal with something that's difficult, deal with it, but you don't have to add all the meaning to it. And that's what I've been doing these past couple of weeks. So I've been trying to subtract the meaning from difficulties and also to give myself a stronger morning practice so I don't end up going on that unbelievable journey.
Speaker #1
Brilliant. There's a really lovely Buddhist parable that I repeat often and it's the two arrows of suffering. Do you know it?
Speaker #0
No, I don't.
Speaker #1
Oh, it's so great. So the first arrow of suffering is the event itself. It's bad enough. But then the second arrow of suffering is all the stories that you create around it.
Speaker #0
Yes.
Speaker #1
Yes. So it's like we don't need that second arrow of suffering. So tell me about your new morning routine and then we'll get into who you are, what you do and all the rest of it. But I set up this series really because I just think generally I love chatting. I love women. I love chatting I love finding out people's stories But also I think in turbulent times, I want to kind of reach out with people that I feel I connect with and who is doing good things because it just gives us all solidarity and makes us understand there's other people who feel like we do all around the world. So I just think it's such a nice way to connect. But I'm really interested in what you have changed then. What's your new morning routine?
Speaker #0
Yeah. So I was doing this manifestation meditation every morning when I woke up. And it's great. And I love it. It's been wonderful. It's been very good to me. But it was like, clearly, that's not the priority in this moment. You need to learn to relax. So I've shifted to doing ones that are about relaxing, reconnecting with the body. I do a lot of guided meditations. And then one on self-love, because I really recognize, oh, the self-love and self-compassion piece has really been missing. I've been really ramping up my negative self-talk and being hard on myself. And that's not helping anything. So I do that. Then I was raised Catholic and I still love a lot of the Catholic practices of spirituality. So I say this beautiful prayer. It's a novena called the Sacred Heart of Jesus. And then I say this incredible prayer that is about abundance, but like more from a spiritual perspective and a holistic perspective called the Prayer of Jabez. And then I get up, I make my coffee and I journal and I do three pages of journaling. It's taken from the practice. of Julia Cameron's The Morning Pages, but I don't do it exactly the way she said. Don't tell her.
Speaker #1
It's always nice to make things your own ritual, isn't it?
Speaker #0
Yeah, yeah, exactly. I prefer to meditate first and get my bearings and reconnect myself before I do the writing. But I do that. And then I dive into my day. But I've created this container where the day isn't consuming me. I can stand on a platform of self-love and then approach the day. And again, it's been two days. Like I do usually do a variation of this, but I've been more disciplined about not looking at my phone, not engaging with email. So really making sure that that container of space when I first wake up is mine versus letting the other world dictate who I am and what I care about.
Speaker #1
Lovely. Great. What a great practice. Really super important, isn't it? To just be reflective in that really rich space of waking up after having slept.
Speaker #0
and then you're waking and it's kind of not to let too many things intrude into that so you can be really intentional for your day yeah yeah exactly and not let the other world set up your standard or let the other world yeah basically there are two worlds it's like your internal world yeah yeah yeah like not let the other world set up your standards for your day and who you're gonna be and show up as that day um because i think that has been a big part of the stress I've incurred over the last two and a half weeks is just like... going on the ride instead of being in the driver's seat.
Speaker #1
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I was talking to somebody about this this morning in that the world that we all live in. really favours exteroception, which is about the outer body. And the work that I do and the work that I think you're talking about is interoception, which is about listening to the space in the body. And we kind of need a little bit of both. And we've just geared too much towards external body and external kind of cues of who we are and what gives us satisfaction. And I think that actually is... the problem. I think that was a big problem of not having this internal kind of reference points, not really understanding truly who you are and who you want to be and how you want to move through the world intentionally.
Speaker #0
Yeah, that's my greatest lesson in life is learning to love myself for who I am, not what I do. Being internally motivated versus externally motivated. I've learned it, but I continue to learn it every single day. Of course.
Speaker #1
It's ongoing learning, isn't it? It's ongoing learning and different times in your life, you'll kind of need to lean more heavily into ritual. So who are you? What do you do? How did you get here?
Speaker #0
I moved to LA when I was 22, started out interning on the Ellen show and my path has taken so much twists and turns. But I started out as an actress here in LA. And from that, I started really auditioning a lot and it was just breaking my heart, honestly. Like I Bye. again, I had such a drive to be externally motivated that when I wasn't doing well in my acting career, I felt like I wasn't doing well as a human being. So from that heartbreak, I started writing music. I always say acting broke my heart. Music healed it. Started driving to all these gigs, playing out. I had really good success as a live musician in LA. And while I was driving to those gigs, I started listening to Sirius XM radio and just saying like, I want to be on the radio someday. I want to work at Sirius XM. I ended up getting an opportunity to do just that. I got to be an associate producer and on-air talent. Within six months, I was moved up to producer. Did that for two and a half years. Then moved on to podcasting. Started my own show, Unleash Your Inner Creative, which as you mentioned is a three-time Webby Award winner and has featured you. We have a lovely episode together. And I've produced over 30 shows, executive produced over 30 shows. Some of the biggest shows that our world has known, things that have shifted the culture, which has been amazing. Through that process of creating other people's shows and creating my own and also releasing music, I started doing creative coaching because I believe creativity is our birthright. And that when we can really access our creativity, we get to also access our full humanity. Plus, it's the antidote to AI. So it's important from multiple perspectives.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
And also doing podcast consulting. So helping indie podcasters and brands take their podcast idea or like take their existing podcasts and make it better. or take their podcast idea and bring it to full fruition. And my latest thing is also speaking. So I've been speaking out on creativity, self-development and healing. And so it's, it's really a hodgepodge of things, but all of them kind of make sense. I feel like the speaking is the greatest evolution of everything because it kind of combines everything I love into one.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Great. So I'm interested. I'm really curious because there's so many podcasts around. What makes, what makes... interesting podcast or is it the same as a successful podcast?
Speaker #0
Well, there's so much luck. So I do want to say that because that is just a truth of business, a truth of entertainment. It's a truth of like, you know, timing plays a factor into it. But I will say like there won't be a successful podcast without a very good specific idea. So when I work with people, What I do is... try to get to the bottom of what is like, who are you and what is your idea? And how do we combine those two things to differentiate this idea in the market? So I, what I call like the podcast thesis statement, which for most people, at least people, um, and brands really, it tends to be at the center of your greatest pain and your greatest joy. And so I help people figure out through their story and the story they want to tell in the show. What is that midpoint? so that they can bring something to the world that is truly their own, that is specific, and that is of service every week, both for the listener and for them.
Speaker #1
Great, great description. What about, do you think that podcast should have an end date? Because there's lots of people that have podcasts and it goes on and on and on. And then it seems like they lose their mission and then they'll just have anyone on because it's good for clickbait, because someone's really controversial. And that seems to happen quite a lot. of late because there's so much stuff going on and I think they're really good ones. are still very authentic and they're still looking for really great guests and good conversations. But I wonder if there is some sort of, and you know how TV series will have like seasons and then it's over and you kind of think sometimes, oh, I'm really glad it's over because I loved it so much and it would have just run its steam.
Speaker #0
I think that any creative project can have or should have an end date when it stops feeling exciting and fresh to the person creating it. If you're doing something just to do it, do it. Now, I'm not talking about people who are like, they need to make their living that way. But even if you do, still, I would say try to find a way to make it vital and fresh to you. Because podcasts are hard. I mean, it's an hour, but it takes so much more work to create that one hour, especially now that we're doing video podcasts, a lot of people at least. So I would say it warrants either a pause or an end date if it has become stale to you. And you have to find a way to like look at it, maybe rebranding, maybe working with someone like me and looking at like, okay, I don't feel passionate about this anymore. This doesn't feel vital to me anymore. How can I still stay true to the original promise of the show, but put something in that makes me excited? Because what I really believe is the energy behind something is just as important, if not more important than the show or the project itself. And if the energy behind something is stale or negative or resentful, I've seen huge shows go from being like top of the zeitgeist, getting millions of downloads to really losing a lot of steam and a lot of momentum and a lot of downloads because the energy behind it was no longer. Either there was a problem with the team, there was a problem with the host, both. So people can feel that. I don't think that people who are creating understand that people, they don't know what they're feeling, but they're feeling the intention and the foundation that that thing is built upon. which is why when I coach someone or produce someone, I'm not just talking about the ideas. I'm also talking about like the health of the team, the health of the host. Like it's way bigger than just what the ideas and what is actually produced each week. It's also how you do it.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Interesting. And have you, are you normally called in at the beginning of something or do you come in to change things around or do you, are you called in any part of that process?
Speaker #0
Any part of the process? It's really fun to do it from the beginning because you get to see basically from a seed, a planting seed to the full plant grows and the garden starts growing. So that's really fun. But one of my most recent clients, she already has a podcast and she wanted to bring me in to refine it, to get her team together, to help her budget get a little bit more allocated in a way that's going to make more sense. So I can come in at all different angles and all different times. But it is really fun to go from the beginning because you get to build something together.
Speaker #1
And how do you split up your time between all the things that you do? Because your own podcast must take up quite a lot of time.
Speaker #0
It does. I would say it takes up a lot less time now than it used to just because I've gotten so good at running it. And I really know what it takes from running all these other shows. But I don't have a specific methodology that I use week after week. I kind of more flow through and just make sure I get everything done that I need to. I do teach course and also like a workshop on how to balance as a multi-passionate creative and I do have a way of doing that in times when I need to be more disciplined I will engage with that which again it's kind of woo-woo but basically you list everything you want to do or everything you're doing and then you feel into it and just ask yourself what percentage of time should I be spending on each and write it down next to each item and it's wild it always comes out to 100% total. And then you enact it and decide how you want to enact it. it. So is it like everything happens each day of the week? Do you focus on certain things, certain days or certain times? And so when I am in a more packed schedule time, I will do that. But right now I'm kind of just flowing through and that's working for me.
Speaker #1
Great. I mean, it doesn't sound woo-woo at all because my work is all about listening to the signals from your body and really attuning yourself, being in much better relationship with yourself and it will pull you towards the things that you want to do and want to spend your time doing and pull you away from the things that you kind of need to eventually get rid of so your nervous system will completely respond to environments you feel really comfortable with and environments you don't and once you listen in you'll be really you become really attuned to that and so you can build a really lovely life for yourself based on how you sense things so actually I don't think it's we were at all, I think there's quite a lot of science behind it.
Speaker #0
Yay. I love being tired. I mean, I'm just following my gut out here. So it's nice when somebody confirms that the gut was correct.
Speaker #1
The gut generally is correct. What does feeling like yourself in your body feel like? Which might be an odd question. Now you're pregnant. How has it changed for you?
Speaker #0
Yeah, well, I've got a buddy now.
Speaker #1
How do you know you're steady with this new environment you created?
Speaker #0
It's crazy. I mean, almost every day I'm like, I can't believe I'm pregnant. Like, I can't think about the fact that there is a being inside of me too much or else I get freaked out. I don't think people talk about that enough.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
but I think it's it's acknowledging it from at least in this moment it's like okay I know I'm sharing my body right now which by the way all mothers you are so kind to share your body like I had no idea until I went through this how kind we all are and how amazing women are we are the creators of the earth um but it really I think it's like for me just listening right now because I did have that incident that happened earlier this week and it was because I was pushing, pushing, pushing. I cannot push the way I used to. And maybe this is the way I was always supposed to be, honestly, because I've pushed myself and not listened and pushed down a lot in order to achieve over the course of my life. And I've gotten better, but I think old habits die hard and they keep coming up during times of stress. So one thing I've noticed is like, since I've been pregnant, I can't just like catapult myself out of bed and speed through my morning, I have to take it easy. I have to, you know, okay, like. the energy can't all be up here. It has to come down. I have to walk a little bit more slowly. If I'm feeling exhausted, I have to lay down. I've never been a napper. My mom told me even when I was a little kid, I never napped. But I'm not napping, but I will allow myself now to lay down in the middle of the day because my body told me to. So having this life growing inside of me has caused me to actually know I need to take better care of myself than I've been doing. and I want to continue that journey postpartum, like once the baby's out of the womb, because I don't think you can be a good mom or a good leader or, you know, show up fully as yourself if you're not tending to yourself. And I think that is what I'm realizing in this moment in my body is how much tending I need. And like, that's okay.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Yeah. Lovely. And also everybody in environment. will respond to you being well regulated and tending to yourself, including your baby when he or she comes, you know, whatever your, you create the environment for them to really thrive in and you're already creating it now and they're picking up on things. So for many, many reasons, it's super important to listen in.
Speaker #0
Yeah. It's pretty cool. Like I, it is a little boy and I talk to him sometimes, like I'll put my hand on my... stomach and I'll be like we're gonna do this together and I'm gonna take you on the road when I do speeches they're like and he starts kicking and I get chills on my legs so it's pretty amazing like the communication that's already happening and that you know you can feel when you're in flow with it yeah
Speaker #1
oh how lovely um so in terms what does your day look like these days then now that you're how far gone are you so far gone
Speaker #0
I am 21 weeks. So I think that's four and a half months, almost five. My days are, like I said, I start out with my morning practice. Then I am producing a show right now. So I go into production mode. I tell my team like what their day's worth of tasks are, taking meetings throughout the day. I mean, I mostly work from home. Once in a while, I'll go into the studio, but it's mostly from home. So I'm blessed in that way. Where in LA do you live,
Speaker #1
Lauren?
Speaker #0
Toluca Lake, which is near Studio City, Burbank area. And I love going on walks in my neighborhood. Like sometimes I allow myself to do that in the middle of the day, especially when I've been like on the screen too much. Taking my coaching clients and my consulting clients and then doing speeches. I have one coming up in May. So it just depends on the day of the week. But flowing through work and like... trying to listen to myself when I need to take a break and do that.
Speaker #1
And are you strict about having weekends off?
Speaker #0
No, not strict about it. Although I will say this past weekend, I really realized, again, I needed to take that mental break and it made a huge difference. The hard thing for me has been over the course of really the last five years, I've been building a business while I've been working a full-time job. So it can kind of lead to this feeling of If I don't do stuff on the weekends, then I'm going to get behind during the week, which can be true. But also, I do think you need to turn off your brain sometimes and rest is part of the creative process. So when I feel myself into that burnout, I'll take time off. I'm really excited to see how my life and career shifts after I'm no longer like toggling between worlds, which will be interesting.
Speaker #1
And when did you stop working full time?
Speaker #0
When did I start? I have been working full time for 11 years and like it's various capacities of various companies. So I've been doing that at this company for eight years. And so at the end of April, I'm going full time into the unknown, doing Lauren LaGrasso productions.
Speaker #1
And I'm really excited about it. Yes, it's so exciting. So exciting. When you are coaching your clients, I'm really interested in your creative coaching. I find that really inspiring because I think at times of just such chaos in the world, creativity can really help to ground you and root you and anchor you. So tell me a little bit about how you got started in that. What's your advice for creatives who aren't feeling very creative right now?
Speaker #0
Yeah. Well, I got started because of my podcast and because I do believe repressed creativity causes a lot of the world suffering. I think I know because of the data says so. We are all born creative. But then life, fear, trauma, all these things can knock it out of us. And so I started the show in part because I knew AI was coming. because you know I knew that with AI that I heard a statistic saying like in 50 years, 85% of all jobs will require creativity. So it's a very vital life and business skill. And also I believe it is every human being's birthright and an innate and heart of the human experience. So when I've seen people repress their creativity or push it aside, I've seen them get depressed. I've seen them get sick. I've seen them gray out. You know, when somebody goes from colorful, bubbly person to just kind of everything is muted. And so I started creative coaching just because I think people deserve to be creative, to be expressed in the world, to get back to what their younger self knew. And so my approach to that is really three-tiered. So it starts out with healing. And what I believe is that when we can get back to the younger self and heal creative wounds, which is like a lowercase t trauma that happened maybe when you were in school. school and the teacher shamed you because you didn't read a sentence well, or you went to sing and you were a little bit off and you were made to feel like you were bad. So we go back to moments like that and heal them because people don't realize they're like subconsciously playing them out in their lives. We also go back to the joy and to the play and start reintegrating some of those things that people loved as kids or young adults into their current life. So the first part is really reclaiming the younger creative. healing that part of themselves and getting integrated in that way. The second part is, again, the thesis statement. I'm very much into like mission statements for your creativity or for your shows. So we find out what their creative mission statement is and then list out their passions. And from there, if they don't know, we find out what their top project is going to be. So we take the passions, put them through the filter of the thesis statement, figure out a project. And then from there, the last part is very tactical. So helping them figure out what do they need to do from A to Z to launch this project out into the world. So that's the methodology. It starts out with healing. It goes into like healing meets practical. And then it goes into extremely practical.
Speaker #1
And what sort of people are coming to you for that?
Speaker #0
All sorts. writers. I had a person who just like was she called herself a generalist. She did all kinds of different things and she wanted to figure out what was her main project. She had supported a lot of other people in her life. So what was the thing that she wanted to do? I would say that's a through line with everyone that comes to me for creative coaching is they've either kind of been scattered or they've poured into other people and it's finally time for them to start pouring into themselves the same way. and figuring out how they want to show up and like how they can show up in the world in a way that feels integrated, less scary, and just really right. So it's people often who also are in the middle of a big career transition and are looking to do things differently this time. But yeah, all kinds of beautiful people come my way.
Speaker #1
Sounds great. And how long is the process?
Speaker #0
It depends on what the project is, but I do say like a minimum of three months because it's really hard to get anything done in less time than that. But I really recommend six if you can or longer.
Speaker #1
Great. And so going back to identity, we were talking about that earlier. My work is very involved in identity. I actually think your nervous system. is your identity because it's formed by experience so far to date. So tell me something that you have stopped identifying with.
Speaker #0
and how that shifted for you
Speaker #1
I think for me it's always a journey I'm I'm not like completely unidentified with these things because again like when you are wound up a certain way it's hard to fully undo it forever like set in stone you know like I always think in my mind I'm like one day I'll be healed and I'm like that's not how it works it's just a send like so
Speaker #0
We are all in process.
Speaker #1
Yes, we're all in process. So just wanted to caveat it with that. But I think the biggest thing really is that external validation that like achievement can save me, that I will get this thing and then I will be saved. So I no longer believe that. I now know it is an inside job and I can be highly ambitious. But at the end of the day, my ambition is just what takes me on the journey. It's all about how I feel on the inside. as I'm pursuing those things. And whether or not I ever get there is meaningless as long as I don't say no to myself.
Speaker #0
Lovely. And what do you think we've normalized in the world that actually isn't working?
Speaker #1
Oh, where to begin, Nahid?
Speaker #0
Thought that might be rich.
Speaker #1
Yeah, I mean, living in the United States, it's pretty, you and I connected because I've been speaking up and I really appreciate the support you've been giving. our country and the people that have been speaking up here um uh cruelty i think one number one that's a big one right now um in the united states especially being pregnant i'm thinking a lot about how much we just leave people to fend for themselves like we're supposed to be the richest country but we don't have healthcare and
Speaker #0
you don't have maternity leave it's when When I found that out, I was just like, I'm sorry, what? Because. I cannot believe that we have lauded the U.S. for so long and you do not have basic health care and you do not have maternity leave for women who give, you know, they give life. Yeah. It's crazy.
Speaker #1
It is so wild. So I would just say in this country right now, what is at the top of my mind is cruelty. Like somehow many of the people in power have convinced the citizens. that they don't deserve these, that these are luxuries and that it's a handout when every other major country, every other westernized country has this. And even ones that aren't rich have this. I mean, it is absolutely wild. So I would definitely say that is top of mind, just cruelty in general, but then how it manifests as well.
Speaker #0
And how are you finding hope at times like this?
Speaker #1
People. Because people are good. And I think when we have corrupt leadership and we have people making decisions that feel so deeply cruel and are actually adversely affecting our lives in a way that we feel, it can be easy to then cast out all of humanity. But it's really not true. The vast majority of people are good. The vast majority of people want good things. The vast majority of people lead with love. And so... I try to look for those people, look up to those people, emulate them and connect with them because people are good despite all the cruelty in the world.
Speaker #0
You know what? You are so right. And something that I always say to everyone as well, I've traveled a little bit by myself in different places. And, you know, I'd heard about, I've been to New York quite a few times. I'd heard about LA, had an idea about LA and I got there and the people were just darling. I had the most Loveliest conversations with people on the street. I was just there staying on my own. People were really kind, really connected with lots of different, you know, even people just doing their own thing on the streets. It was so lovely. And that was just a real reminder, because LA sometimes can be kind of the excesses of the world, can't it? But it was just such a lovely reminder that the people are not their governments. And there's ordinary people just wanting to have, you know, joy and creativity and... to live a life full of humanity and to really, yeah, just to kind of live well. It's just such a reassuring thing to see wherever you go in the world. And actually is the thing that also gives me a lot of hope.
Speaker #1
Yeah. I always say too, like LA natives, people who were born and raised here are so kind. I grew up in a region of the United States called the Midwest and it's known for being really nice. Like we talk like this because we smile all our words. So, um... I find people who are born and raised here, especially in the Valley, which is the area I live, are kind of like the people I grew up with. It's people who move here and then feel like they have to put on airs and be LA in order to fit in. that ruin it and give it that bad name. But the natives to LA are just like the most beautiful, kindest people. And I do think that the entertainment industry does kind of color the city and can make things feel transactional. But again, it's about looking for the people who want to build community, who want to help, who also are dreamers and want to lift up your dreams and have you lift up theirs. So I don't know. I think when we cast these major judgments over an entire place, it feels like it's like a self-protective thing or like a way we can stay in victim mode it's like well i don't have this because this place is that way or these people are but it's like that can't be true everywhere and i don't know i always say because like people complain about dating in la too and i always say what people who complained about dating in la dated each other like maybe they'd find they're part of the problem did you did you meet your husband in la i did I did. I met him, you know, through two of my best friends from childhood. I was very lucky. We just happened to be at their apartment the same night and kind of locked in on each other and became friends over the course of four months. And he's my favorite person.
Speaker #0
So I always think, I always think relationships where your friends first, and you kind of have some time to get to know each other are much more successful. Like I've never dated on a dating app. because I've been with my partner for quite a long time. And I can't imagine it because I don't really want, I don't want to be judged in such a small pace of time because, you know, yeah, it's just hideous. I don't like the set.
Speaker #1
I tried. I did the dating app. Did you? It wasn't even that people look different. Like when, you know, from the pictures they posted, it was their energy was different. Yeah. They presented as one way online. But then when you were in person, it was this completely different. kind of detached person and I just think you can't get an energetic read like people complain about the pictures but I think what they're actually feeling and it's the energy behind it oh right yeah you don't think someone is yeah you're so so right I think you're absolutely right because also stills don't
Speaker #0
really give you a flavor of anything you know it's just kind of like that that sort of frozen thing where they're trying to do their best face But I once, you've just reminded me of a funny story. I had a girlfriend of mine who was having a bit of an affair with this man. And he really liked writing to her. So she asked me to write on her behalf. Oh, my God, I'm still ashamed to this day. So I started writing. And then I really enjoyed what he was sending back. And then we really got into it. She knew that it was happening. She'd be like, yeah. And all along the way, I was just like, this is awful. We are, it's catfishing now. But we didn't have a term for it. But I just remember thinking, this is awful because this is not true. And he's going to find out. It's just going to be really bad. And I'm setting you up for something that will never deliver. And the whole thing, I actually had to just stop and kind of run away from the whole situation. And he used to say to her when they met, he used to say, you're so different.
Speaker #1
It's like, oh, weird. So straight. Wait, you need to write about that. Like, that's a novel.
Speaker #0
That's funny. Well, I do. I do. So as you know, I wrote the book and everyone keeps saying, what about the next book? And I don't have a second book right now on wellness. I just think the world is such a mess. I'm not sure it needs another wellness book from me right now. And also my work is practical. So I'm putting lots of my attention into actually making little tools that people can listen to and do something with. So lots of somatic meditations and somatic lessons. But I do have a novel because I've been involved in the wellness world for quite a bit. And I've worked across four different industries. But I've met so many people whose actions and their words do not align. I think they're such a great, and they're really hilarious characters. And I just think those are great. So that story will come in somewhere.
Speaker #1
We should swap stories someday. So we could have a field day.
Speaker #0
I'm sure we could have a field day.
Speaker #1
I feel that for you. I really do. And when you were talking about the writing, I'm like, she needs to write a novel. Sometimes I get little downloads for people's creative lives, and I feel like it will be very successful.
Speaker #0
I feel like I really want to, too, because I've just met such great characters and I've got such interesting things to say about them. So I will do it one day. I'm going to start making some notes. So thank you for that encouragement. Good. Do you offer any little short courses on how to reboot your creativity?
Speaker #1
I'm working on a few right now. Yeah, good idea. But yeah, I'm working on a masterclass and then a longer term class as well. Both be just always on so people can buy them and then just do them at their leisure. But that's the next part of my business I want to build out and also share as an offering. One-on-one isn't right for everybody. So I want to have something where people can just tap in, enjoy it, go back to it when they feel called.
Speaker #0
And it gives them, yeah, exactly. It gives them a flavor of how you work. And, you know, it's a really good way. I do quite a bit of that. And it's a really good route into what you do. Or it might just be enough. And that's where they want to stay. And that's kind of pretty cool, too. So tell me what helps you. What are you protecting these days? I think you've mentioned it. Now you're with baby. What are you protecting? It sounds like your time, but is there anything else?
Speaker #1
My peace, I would say. I think I sacrificed a lot of peace in the name of ambition or even just like doing the right thing. And, you know, I've had some opportunities over the past couple months where I probably could have put myself in a position that would have put me around more high profile people and maybe could have. propped me up to the next level. But I realized being in that energy would actually not be good for my peace. And I had to, especially because I was pregnant, prioritize that. I'm also no longer interested in trying to crunch myself up and get seen in this one way in the hopes that maybe they'll see the full of me. Like,
Speaker #0
yeah,
Speaker #1
I'm not doing that anymore. If someone sees me great, If they don't, that's fine too. I no longer am here to convince you. I just want to feel good within myself and share my true self. And whoever's on board, amazing. Whoever's not, that's okay too.
Speaker #0
I think that's also, as you get older, you get more in your power and more kind of like, yeah, I really know who I am. And I just, I don't want to play that game. Plus, you know, a lot of people I see are in that game and it really messes with them. You know, it's a really tough game. that there's always a price to pay.
Speaker #1
It doesn't really make you any happier. I think at some point you have to look at the actions you've taken and say, did that move the needle for me in my overall happiness or satisfaction with life? Yeah. And if the answer is repeatedly no, then you have to evolve your behaviors and your actions.
Speaker #0
Yeah, completely. Of course, that is, you know, how we evolve, right? Right. If we always stay the same, then it's kind of where's the learning?
Speaker #1
Yeah. Why are we here?
Speaker #0
Why are we here? Is there anything that you want to tell us about that you're working on?
Speaker #1
Yes. So definitely my creative coaching. If you're interested in that, I would love to connect with you. There's more information on my website, Lauren LaGrasso.
Speaker #0
I also have all your details underneath the video.
Speaker #1
Putting my details in. So I also have a sub stack if you want to check that out. I've been into writing. I like, he'd want to write a book. So That is on the goals list over the next couple years. And my speaking. If you know anybody who is looking for a speaker to talk on the topics of creativity and self-development, leadership, I would love to come in and do that. I've been speaking at different companies, conferences, colleges, and that has been so much fun. I also incorporate my music, which is amazing, and have the audience sing with me, which is my favorite. And the podcast, Unleash Your Inner Creative. Out. New episodes are out every Thursday. And that's always, start with the Heads episode. It's like a great way to get in because you already know her. And then if you want to stick around, you can become a creative cutie.
Speaker #0
Yeah. I love your episodes. I love your podcast. Every time I need some inspiration, I will listen to an episode. I think they're fab. I think it's a really great thing to put out in the world. So thank you for what you do. Thank you for joining me this morning, Lauren. And I'm sure we will be in touch.
Speaker #1
Okay. I hope so. You're awesome. And thank you for having me. And thank you for allowing me to connect with your community. They seem amazing.
Speaker #0
You're so kind. Take care. Lots of love. Enjoy your day. Bye-bye.
Speaker #1
Thank you. Bye-bye. Thank you so much for listening to this very special, unconventional episode of Unleash. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Love Nahid. Again, if you're free in late June or early July, definitely check out her retreat in Greece. The link is in the show notes. And thank you again for listening. If you like what you heard, feel free to rate and review, share the show with a friend and post about it on social media. If you do post about it, tag me at Lauren LaGrasso and at Unleash Your Inner Creative, and I will repost to share my gratitude. I love you and I believe in you. And I'll talk with you next week.

About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

Unleash Your Inner Creative is a Webby Award-winning podcast designed to help you break free from self-doubt, embrace your creativity, and live an authentic, purpose-filled life. I’m Lauren LoGrasso, a multi-passionate creative, and I believe that repressed creativity is one of the root causes of unhappiness—which is why I’m here to help you unleash yours! Through a blend of inspiring interviews, solo episodes, and coaching sessions, this show explores creativity, mental health, spirituality, and self-development.

On the pod, you'll hear from incredible guests like The Artist’s Way author Julia Cameron, How I Built This host Guy Raz, brain coach Jim Kwik, and Codependent No More's Melody Beattie, as well as artists and performers like Chrisette Michele and Hannah Berner. Together, we share the tools and insights to help you rewire your mindset, overcome fear, and follow your heart’s deepest desires. Whether you’re a lifelong creative or just feeling a spark, I invite you to tune in, tap into your true potential, and unleash your inner creative!

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Description

We also get into:

Why high achievers struggle to metabolize stress
The “second arrow of suffering” and how we make things worse than they are
How to stop absorbing other people’s energy and emotions
My new morning routine for regulating my nervous system
Pregnancy, ambition, and learning to actually take care of myself
What it really looks like to step into a new chapter of your life (for me entrepreneurship and Motherhood)

This conversation is honest, grounding, and deeply human. If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or like life has been heavier than it needs to be… this one is for you.

You can connect with Nahid and learn more about her work: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/

Check out her retreat in Greece: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/thesootheweekinlefkadagreece

Check out my Substack: https://substack.com/@laurenlograsso

✨ Want to work together? Email me at Lauren.LoGrasso@gmail.com or visit https://www.laurenlograsso.com/contact/ to book a free 15-minute discovery call.

Follow the show: @unleashyourinnercreative

Follow me: @LaurenLoGrasso

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Transcription

Speaker #0
Hello, my sweet creative cutie. I hope you're doing well today. I have a special treat for you on today's show. I'm doing something a little different than I normally do. So last week, I had the pleasure of sitting down with friend of the show and past Unleash Your Inner Creative guest, Nahid De Beljon. And Nahid is an expert in nervous system soothing. She wrote an incredible book called Soothe. You should definitely go back and check out our episode together. But this past week... I had her interview me. The tables were turned. And it was such a beautiful, heartfelt, insightful conversation that after we wrapped, I felt compelled to reach out to her and say, hey, would you be okay with me sharing that with my listeners? It was just really honest, a lot of good takeaways. It was a breath of fresh air, honestly. Like, it's wonderful to be able to just drop in with someone and talk heart to heart, and especially about difficult things and... creative things and things revolving around self-development and career and all of that. So I am going to share that with you today. So this is from the Substack Live we did last Thursday, a week ago today, and I think you're going to love it. We get into my career, what I am trying to do in the next phase of my life, going into entrepreneurship, how I'm feeling about motherhood, how I'm now looking at stress and rest, and And... It's really just a great chat. She's delightful. Just listening to her voice makes me feel calmer. And I know that it will do the same for you. Yeah. I just think it brings out like me being with her brought out really interesting textures and my personality and great things that I know you're going to get a lot out of. So I'm excited for you to listen to it. Also, if you feel like you also get a sense of calm just from listening to Nahid, just imagine working with her. She is so incredible and she's doing this retreat I wanted to tell you about. She's got three spaces left on her June 27th through July 4th retreat. It's in Greece. So if you're looking for a little European getaway and to learn how to soothe your nervous system, what could be better? Literally, what could be better? Go ahead and check that out. I'm going to put the link in the show notes. So go soothe yourself with Nahid. But before you do that, listen to this incredible conversation. And have a great rest of your week.
Speaker #1
Welcome to this chat with me today. Thanks for joining me all the way from LA.
Speaker #0
Oh, thank you for having me. Happy to be here. From anywhere.
Speaker #1
So let me just go through all the things that you've done. You're a podcasting, You're a world's traveler across podcasting, creative coaching. And you have an... Webby award-winning podcast Unleash Your Inner Creative, which you were very kind to invite me to. Tell us a little bit about how we find you today. What's on your mind?
Speaker #0
Well, that's a great question. I have a lot of things on my mind all the time at once, but I would say the biggest takeaway from this week is I have realized the past couple weeks, I have not been metabolizing stress very well. And so the past two and a half days, I've changed my approach and it has worked.
Speaker #1
And what were you doing before and what are you doing now?
Speaker #0
Before I was just letting every stressor just take me on a journey and not really being thoughtful about it or realizing like, you know, I've heard someone say recently emergencies usually have ambulances. And I was letting other people's... perceived emergencies become my own and just go on the whole journey and taking too much responsibility for other people's mistakes. Or even if you're in a leadership role, like I do think you have to obviously be accountable if the team isn't working as well as you want. But taking what is your part and leaving the rest on the table, I think is important to de-stressing and living well.
Speaker #1
So important. And it's something I often talk to my clients about. They're often really responsible and... With that responsibility also comes this idea that everyone else is an idiot and they can't do things as well as them. So they don't let go of things. And whenever they do ask other people to do things, they want it done to their standards. I'm like, it doesn't matter. Let it go. You know, that's kind of setting yourself up to fail and to be overwhelmed with responsibility for the world. You just can't possibly hold it all. So let people do it. things their way and don't be so fussed about it. You know, don't worry so much about the outcome because it's going to be okay. You know, you don't have to be responsible for everyone.
Speaker #0
Yeah. And you can't be, and honestly, frankly, you shouldn't be like, you know, people need to make their own mistakes and live their own lives. And yeah, I would say I've definitely struggled with codependency over the course of my life. And over the past couple of weeks, I've had, I've fallen back into some of my own ways, old ways. And I had a wake up call cause you know, I'm pregnant. And on Wednesday, I woke up, you know, after a stressful night and I, or it's Tuesday. And I was spotting and it was like, I don't think it was attached, but it was an important wake up call literally from my body, from my baby being like, Hey, it's not that deep. Take a breath, take care of yourself, take care of me. And thankfully by the end of the night, I did end up going to the hospital by the end of the night, it had gone away. The baby was fine. The heartbeat was strong, all that stuff. But it was like, I, unfortunately I needed that wake up call for me to realize, Oh, I have been making things way bigger and harder than they need to be. Like if you need to deal with something that's difficult, deal with it, but you don't have to add all the meaning to it. And that's what I've been doing these past couple of weeks. So I've been trying to subtract the meaning from difficulties and also to give myself a stronger morning practice so I don't end up going on that unbelievable journey.
Speaker #1
Brilliant. There's a really lovely Buddhist parable that I repeat often and it's the two arrows of suffering. Do you know it?
Speaker #0
No, I don't.
Speaker #1
Oh, it's so great. So the first arrow of suffering is the event itself. It's bad enough. But then the second arrow of suffering is all the stories that you create around it.
Speaker #0
Yes.
Speaker #1
Yes. So it's like we don't need that second arrow of suffering. So tell me about your new morning routine and then we'll get into who you are, what you do and all the rest of it. But I set up this series really because I just think generally I love chatting. I love women. I love chatting I love finding out people's stories But also I think in turbulent times, I want to kind of reach out with people that I feel I connect with and who is doing good things because it just gives us all solidarity and makes us understand there's other people who feel like we do all around the world. So I just think it's such a nice way to connect. But I'm really interested in what you have changed then. What's your new morning routine?
Speaker #0
Yeah. So I was doing this manifestation meditation every morning when I woke up. And it's great. And I love it. It's been wonderful. It's been very good to me. But it was like, clearly, that's not the priority in this moment. You need to learn to relax. So I've shifted to doing ones that are about relaxing, reconnecting with the body. I do a lot of guided meditations. And then one on self-love, because I really recognize, oh, the self-love and self-compassion piece has really been missing. I've been really ramping up my negative self-talk and being hard on myself. And that's not helping anything. So I do that. Then I was raised Catholic and I still love a lot of the Catholic practices of spirituality. So I say this beautiful prayer. It's a novena called the Sacred Heart of Jesus. And then I say this incredible prayer that is about abundance, but like more from a spiritual perspective and a holistic perspective called the Prayer of Jabez. And then I get up, I make my coffee and I journal and I do three pages of journaling. It's taken from the practice. of Julia Cameron's The Morning Pages, but I don't do it exactly the way she said. Don't tell her.
Speaker #1
It's always nice to make things your own ritual, isn't it?
Speaker #0
Yeah, yeah, exactly. I prefer to meditate first and get my bearings and reconnect myself before I do the writing. But I do that. And then I dive into my day. But I've created this container where the day isn't consuming me. I can stand on a platform of self-love and then approach the day. And again, it's been two days. Like I do usually do a variation of this, but I've been more disciplined about not looking at my phone, not engaging with email. So really making sure that that container of space when I first wake up is mine versus letting the other world dictate who I am and what I care about.
Speaker #1
Lovely. Great. What a great practice. Really super important, isn't it? To just be reflective in that really rich space of waking up after having slept.
Speaker #0
and then you're waking and it's kind of not to let too many things intrude into that so you can be really intentional for your day yeah yeah exactly and not let the other world set up your standard or let the other world yeah basically there are two worlds it's like your internal world yeah yeah yeah like not let the other world set up your standards for your day and who you're gonna be and show up as that day um because i think that has been a big part of the stress I've incurred over the last two and a half weeks is just like... going on the ride instead of being in the driver's seat.
Speaker #1
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I was talking to somebody about this this morning in that the world that we all live in. really favours exteroception, which is about the outer body. And the work that I do and the work that I think you're talking about is interoception, which is about listening to the space in the body. And we kind of need a little bit of both. And we've just geared too much towards external body and external kind of cues of who we are and what gives us satisfaction. And I think that actually is... the problem. I think that was a big problem of not having this internal kind of reference points, not really understanding truly who you are and who you want to be and how you want to move through the world intentionally.
Speaker #0
Yeah, that's my greatest lesson in life is learning to love myself for who I am, not what I do. Being internally motivated versus externally motivated. I've learned it, but I continue to learn it every single day. Of course.
Speaker #1
It's ongoing learning, isn't it? It's ongoing learning and different times in your life, you'll kind of need to lean more heavily into ritual. So who are you? What do you do? How did you get here?
Speaker #0
I moved to LA when I was 22, started out interning on the Ellen show and my path has taken so much twists and turns. But I started out as an actress here in LA. And from that, I started really auditioning a lot and it was just breaking my heart, honestly. Like I Bye. again, I had such a drive to be externally motivated that when I wasn't doing well in my acting career, I felt like I wasn't doing well as a human being. So from that heartbreak, I started writing music. I always say acting broke my heart. Music healed it. Started driving to all these gigs, playing out. I had really good success as a live musician in LA. And while I was driving to those gigs, I started listening to Sirius XM radio and just saying like, I want to be on the radio someday. I want to work at Sirius XM. I ended up getting an opportunity to do just that. I got to be an associate producer and on-air talent. Within six months, I was moved up to producer. Did that for two and a half years. Then moved on to podcasting. Started my own show, Unleash Your Inner Creative, which as you mentioned is a three-time Webby Award winner and has featured you. We have a lovely episode together. And I've produced over 30 shows, executive produced over 30 shows. Some of the biggest shows that our world has known, things that have shifted the culture, which has been amazing. Through that process of creating other people's shows and creating my own and also releasing music, I started doing creative coaching because I believe creativity is our birthright. And that when we can really access our creativity, we get to also access our full humanity. Plus, it's the antidote to AI. So it's important from multiple perspectives.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
And also doing podcast consulting. So helping indie podcasters and brands take their podcast idea or like take their existing podcasts and make it better. or take their podcast idea and bring it to full fruition. And my latest thing is also speaking. So I've been speaking out on creativity, self-development and healing. And so it's, it's really a hodgepodge of things, but all of them kind of make sense. I feel like the speaking is the greatest evolution of everything because it kind of combines everything I love into one.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Great. So I'm interested. I'm really curious because there's so many podcasts around. What makes, what makes... interesting podcast or is it the same as a successful podcast?
Speaker #0
Well, there's so much luck. So I do want to say that because that is just a truth of business, a truth of entertainment. It's a truth of like, you know, timing plays a factor into it. But I will say like there won't be a successful podcast without a very good specific idea. So when I work with people, What I do is... try to get to the bottom of what is like, who are you and what is your idea? And how do we combine those two things to differentiate this idea in the market? So I, what I call like the podcast thesis statement, which for most people, at least people, um, and brands really, it tends to be at the center of your greatest pain and your greatest joy. And so I help people figure out through their story and the story they want to tell in the show. What is that midpoint? so that they can bring something to the world that is truly their own, that is specific, and that is of service every week, both for the listener and for them.
Speaker #1
Great, great description. What about, do you think that podcast should have an end date? Because there's lots of people that have podcasts and it goes on and on and on. And then it seems like they lose their mission and then they'll just have anyone on because it's good for clickbait, because someone's really controversial. And that seems to happen quite a lot. of late because there's so much stuff going on and I think they're really good ones. are still very authentic and they're still looking for really great guests and good conversations. But I wonder if there is some sort of, and you know how TV series will have like seasons and then it's over and you kind of think sometimes, oh, I'm really glad it's over because I loved it so much and it would have just run its steam.
Speaker #0
I think that any creative project can have or should have an end date when it stops feeling exciting and fresh to the person creating it. If you're doing something just to do it, do it. Now, I'm not talking about people who are like, they need to make their living that way. But even if you do, still, I would say try to find a way to make it vital and fresh to you. Because podcasts are hard. I mean, it's an hour, but it takes so much more work to create that one hour, especially now that we're doing video podcasts, a lot of people at least. So I would say it warrants either a pause or an end date if it has become stale to you. And you have to find a way to like look at it, maybe rebranding, maybe working with someone like me and looking at like, okay, I don't feel passionate about this anymore. This doesn't feel vital to me anymore. How can I still stay true to the original promise of the show, but put something in that makes me excited? Because what I really believe is the energy behind something is just as important, if not more important than the show or the project itself. And if the energy behind something is stale or negative or resentful, I've seen huge shows go from being like top of the zeitgeist, getting millions of downloads to really losing a lot of steam and a lot of momentum and a lot of downloads because the energy behind it was no longer. Either there was a problem with the team, there was a problem with the host, both. So people can feel that. I don't think that people who are creating understand that people, they don't know what they're feeling, but they're feeling the intention and the foundation that that thing is built upon. which is why when I coach someone or produce someone, I'm not just talking about the ideas. I'm also talking about like the health of the team, the health of the host. Like it's way bigger than just what the ideas and what is actually produced each week. It's also how you do it.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Interesting. And have you, are you normally called in at the beginning of something or do you come in to change things around or do you, are you called in any part of that process?
Speaker #0
Any part of the process? It's really fun to do it from the beginning because you get to see basically from a seed, a planting seed to the full plant grows and the garden starts growing. So that's really fun. But one of my most recent clients, she already has a podcast and she wanted to bring me in to refine it, to get her team together, to help her budget get a little bit more allocated in a way that's going to make more sense. So I can come in at all different angles and all different times. But it is really fun to go from the beginning because you get to build something together.
Speaker #1
And how do you split up your time between all the things that you do? Because your own podcast must take up quite a lot of time.
Speaker #0
It does. I would say it takes up a lot less time now than it used to just because I've gotten so good at running it. And I really know what it takes from running all these other shows. But I don't have a specific methodology that I use week after week. I kind of more flow through and just make sure I get everything done that I need to. I do teach course and also like a workshop on how to balance as a multi-passionate creative and I do have a way of doing that in times when I need to be more disciplined I will engage with that which again it's kind of woo-woo but basically you list everything you want to do or everything you're doing and then you feel into it and just ask yourself what percentage of time should I be spending on each and write it down next to each item and it's wild it always comes out to 100% total. And then you enact it and decide how you want to enact it. it. So is it like everything happens each day of the week? Do you focus on certain things, certain days or certain times? And so when I am in a more packed schedule time, I will do that. But right now I'm kind of just flowing through and that's working for me.
Speaker #1
Great. I mean, it doesn't sound woo-woo at all because my work is all about listening to the signals from your body and really attuning yourself, being in much better relationship with yourself and it will pull you towards the things that you want to do and want to spend your time doing and pull you away from the things that you kind of need to eventually get rid of so your nervous system will completely respond to environments you feel really comfortable with and environments you don't and once you listen in you'll be really you become really attuned to that and so you can build a really lovely life for yourself based on how you sense things so actually I don't think it's we were at all, I think there's quite a lot of science behind it.
Speaker #0
Yay. I love being tired. I mean, I'm just following my gut out here. So it's nice when somebody confirms that the gut was correct.
Speaker #1
The gut generally is correct. What does feeling like yourself in your body feel like? Which might be an odd question. Now you're pregnant. How has it changed for you?
Speaker #0
Yeah, well, I've got a buddy now.
Speaker #1
How do you know you're steady with this new environment you created?
Speaker #0
It's crazy. I mean, almost every day I'm like, I can't believe I'm pregnant. Like, I can't think about the fact that there is a being inside of me too much or else I get freaked out. I don't think people talk about that enough.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
but I think it's it's acknowledging it from at least in this moment it's like okay I know I'm sharing my body right now which by the way all mothers you are so kind to share your body like I had no idea until I went through this how kind we all are and how amazing women are we are the creators of the earth um but it really I think it's like for me just listening right now because I did have that incident that happened earlier this week and it was because I was pushing, pushing, pushing. I cannot push the way I used to. And maybe this is the way I was always supposed to be, honestly, because I've pushed myself and not listened and pushed down a lot in order to achieve over the course of my life. And I've gotten better, but I think old habits die hard and they keep coming up during times of stress. So one thing I've noticed is like, since I've been pregnant, I can't just like catapult myself out of bed and speed through my morning, I have to take it easy. I have to, you know, okay, like. the energy can't all be up here. It has to come down. I have to walk a little bit more slowly. If I'm feeling exhausted, I have to lay down. I've never been a napper. My mom told me even when I was a little kid, I never napped. But I'm not napping, but I will allow myself now to lay down in the middle of the day because my body told me to. So having this life growing inside of me has caused me to actually know I need to take better care of myself than I've been doing. and I want to continue that journey postpartum, like once the baby's out of the womb, because I don't think you can be a good mom or a good leader or, you know, show up fully as yourself if you're not tending to yourself. And I think that is what I'm realizing in this moment in my body is how much tending I need. And like, that's okay.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Yeah. Lovely. And also everybody in environment. will respond to you being well regulated and tending to yourself, including your baby when he or she comes, you know, whatever your, you create the environment for them to really thrive in and you're already creating it now and they're picking up on things. So for many, many reasons, it's super important to listen in.
Speaker #0
Yeah. It's pretty cool. Like I, it is a little boy and I talk to him sometimes, like I'll put my hand on my... stomach and I'll be like we're gonna do this together and I'm gonna take you on the road when I do speeches they're like and he starts kicking and I get chills on my legs so it's pretty amazing like the communication that's already happening and that you know you can feel when you're in flow with it yeah
Speaker #1
oh how lovely um so in terms what does your day look like these days then now that you're how far gone are you so far gone
Speaker #0
I am 21 weeks. So I think that's four and a half months, almost five. My days are, like I said, I start out with my morning practice. Then I am producing a show right now. So I go into production mode. I tell my team like what their day's worth of tasks are, taking meetings throughout the day. I mean, I mostly work from home. Once in a while, I'll go into the studio, but it's mostly from home. So I'm blessed in that way. Where in LA do you live,
Speaker #1
Lauren?
Speaker #0
Toluca Lake, which is near Studio City, Burbank area. And I love going on walks in my neighborhood. Like sometimes I allow myself to do that in the middle of the day, especially when I've been like on the screen too much. Taking my coaching clients and my consulting clients and then doing speeches. I have one coming up in May. So it just depends on the day of the week. But flowing through work and like... trying to listen to myself when I need to take a break and do that.
Speaker #1
And are you strict about having weekends off?
Speaker #0
No, not strict about it. Although I will say this past weekend, I really realized, again, I needed to take that mental break and it made a huge difference. The hard thing for me has been over the course of really the last five years, I've been building a business while I've been working a full-time job. So it can kind of lead to this feeling of If I don't do stuff on the weekends, then I'm going to get behind during the week, which can be true. But also, I do think you need to turn off your brain sometimes and rest is part of the creative process. So when I feel myself into that burnout, I'll take time off. I'm really excited to see how my life and career shifts after I'm no longer like toggling between worlds, which will be interesting.
Speaker #1
And when did you stop working full time?
Speaker #0
When did I start? I have been working full time for 11 years and like it's various capacities of various companies. So I've been doing that at this company for eight years. And so at the end of April, I'm going full time into the unknown, doing Lauren LaGrasso productions.
Speaker #1
And I'm really excited about it. Yes, it's so exciting. So exciting. When you are coaching your clients, I'm really interested in your creative coaching. I find that really inspiring because I think at times of just such chaos in the world, creativity can really help to ground you and root you and anchor you. So tell me a little bit about how you got started in that. What's your advice for creatives who aren't feeling very creative right now?
Speaker #0
Yeah. Well, I got started because of my podcast and because I do believe repressed creativity causes a lot of the world suffering. I think I know because of the data says so. We are all born creative. But then life, fear, trauma, all these things can knock it out of us. And so I started the show in part because I knew AI was coming. because you know I knew that with AI that I heard a statistic saying like in 50 years, 85% of all jobs will require creativity. So it's a very vital life and business skill. And also I believe it is every human being's birthright and an innate and heart of the human experience. So when I've seen people repress their creativity or push it aside, I've seen them get depressed. I've seen them get sick. I've seen them gray out. You know, when somebody goes from colorful, bubbly person to just kind of everything is muted. And so I started creative coaching just because I think people deserve to be creative, to be expressed in the world, to get back to what their younger self knew. And so my approach to that is really three-tiered. So it starts out with healing. And what I believe is that when we can get back to the younger self and heal creative wounds, which is like a lowercase t trauma that happened maybe when you were in school. school and the teacher shamed you because you didn't read a sentence well, or you went to sing and you were a little bit off and you were made to feel like you were bad. So we go back to moments like that and heal them because people don't realize they're like subconsciously playing them out in their lives. We also go back to the joy and to the play and start reintegrating some of those things that people loved as kids or young adults into their current life. So the first part is really reclaiming the younger creative. healing that part of themselves and getting integrated in that way. The second part is, again, the thesis statement. I'm very much into like mission statements for your creativity or for your shows. So we find out what their creative mission statement is and then list out their passions. And from there, if they don't know, we find out what their top project is going to be. So we take the passions, put them through the filter of the thesis statement, figure out a project. And then from there, the last part is very tactical. So helping them figure out what do they need to do from A to Z to launch this project out into the world. So that's the methodology. It starts out with healing. It goes into like healing meets practical. And then it goes into extremely practical.
Speaker #1
And what sort of people are coming to you for that?
Speaker #0
All sorts. writers. I had a person who just like was she called herself a generalist. She did all kinds of different things and she wanted to figure out what was her main project. She had supported a lot of other people in her life. So what was the thing that she wanted to do? I would say that's a through line with everyone that comes to me for creative coaching is they've either kind of been scattered or they've poured into other people and it's finally time for them to start pouring into themselves the same way. and figuring out how they want to show up and like how they can show up in the world in a way that feels integrated, less scary, and just really right. So it's people often who also are in the middle of a big career transition and are looking to do things differently this time. But yeah, all kinds of beautiful people come my way.
Speaker #1
Sounds great. And how long is the process?
Speaker #0
It depends on what the project is, but I do say like a minimum of three months because it's really hard to get anything done in less time than that. But I really recommend six if you can or longer.
Speaker #1
Great. And so going back to identity, we were talking about that earlier. My work is very involved in identity. I actually think your nervous system. is your identity because it's formed by experience so far to date. So tell me something that you have stopped identifying with.
Speaker #0
and how that shifted for you
Speaker #1
I think for me it's always a journey I'm I'm not like completely unidentified with these things because again like when you are wound up a certain way it's hard to fully undo it forever like set in stone you know like I always think in my mind I'm like one day I'll be healed and I'm like that's not how it works it's just a send like so
Speaker #0
We are all in process.
Speaker #1
Yes, we're all in process. So just wanted to caveat it with that. But I think the biggest thing really is that external validation that like achievement can save me, that I will get this thing and then I will be saved. So I no longer believe that. I now know it is an inside job and I can be highly ambitious. But at the end of the day, my ambition is just what takes me on the journey. It's all about how I feel on the inside. as I'm pursuing those things. And whether or not I ever get there is meaningless as long as I don't say no to myself.
Speaker #0
Lovely. And what do you think we've normalized in the world that actually isn't working?
Speaker #1
Oh, where to begin, Nahid?
Speaker #0
Thought that might be rich.
Speaker #1
Yeah, I mean, living in the United States, it's pretty, you and I connected because I've been speaking up and I really appreciate the support you've been giving. our country and the people that have been speaking up here um uh cruelty i think one number one that's a big one right now um in the united states especially being pregnant i'm thinking a lot about how much we just leave people to fend for themselves like we're supposed to be the richest country but we don't have healthcare and
Speaker #0
you don't have maternity leave it's when When I found that out, I was just like, I'm sorry, what? Because. I cannot believe that we have lauded the U.S. for so long and you do not have basic health care and you do not have maternity leave for women who give, you know, they give life. Yeah. It's crazy.
Speaker #1
It is so wild. So I would just say in this country right now, what is at the top of my mind is cruelty. Like somehow many of the people in power have convinced the citizens. that they don't deserve these, that these are luxuries and that it's a handout when every other major country, every other westernized country has this. And even ones that aren't rich have this. I mean, it is absolutely wild. So I would definitely say that is top of mind, just cruelty in general, but then how it manifests as well.
Speaker #0
And how are you finding hope at times like this?
Speaker #1
People. Because people are good. And I think when we have corrupt leadership and we have people making decisions that feel so deeply cruel and are actually adversely affecting our lives in a way that we feel, it can be easy to then cast out all of humanity. But it's really not true. The vast majority of people are good. The vast majority of people want good things. The vast majority of people lead with love. And so... I try to look for those people, look up to those people, emulate them and connect with them because people are good despite all the cruelty in the world.
Speaker #0
You know what? You are so right. And something that I always say to everyone as well, I've traveled a little bit by myself in different places. And, you know, I'd heard about, I've been to New York quite a few times. I'd heard about LA, had an idea about LA and I got there and the people were just darling. I had the most Loveliest conversations with people on the street. I was just there staying on my own. People were really kind, really connected with lots of different, you know, even people just doing their own thing on the streets. It was so lovely. And that was just a real reminder, because LA sometimes can be kind of the excesses of the world, can't it? But it was just such a lovely reminder that the people are not their governments. And there's ordinary people just wanting to have, you know, joy and creativity and... to live a life full of humanity and to really, yeah, just to kind of live well. It's just such a reassuring thing to see wherever you go in the world. And actually is the thing that also gives me a lot of hope.
Speaker #1
Yeah. I always say too, like LA natives, people who were born and raised here are so kind. I grew up in a region of the United States called the Midwest and it's known for being really nice. Like we talk like this because we smile all our words. So, um... I find people who are born and raised here, especially in the Valley, which is the area I live, are kind of like the people I grew up with. It's people who move here and then feel like they have to put on airs and be LA in order to fit in. that ruin it and give it that bad name. But the natives to LA are just like the most beautiful, kindest people. And I do think that the entertainment industry does kind of color the city and can make things feel transactional. But again, it's about looking for the people who want to build community, who want to help, who also are dreamers and want to lift up your dreams and have you lift up theirs. So I don't know. I think when we cast these major judgments over an entire place, it feels like it's like a self-protective thing or like a way we can stay in victim mode it's like well i don't have this because this place is that way or these people are but it's like that can't be true everywhere and i don't know i always say because like people complain about dating in la too and i always say what people who complained about dating in la dated each other like maybe they'd find they're part of the problem did you did you meet your husband in la i did I did. I met him, you know, through two of my best friends from childhood. I was very lucky. We just happened to be at their apartment the same night and kind of locked in on each other and became friends over the course of four months. And he's my favorite person.
Speaker #0
So I always think, I always think relationships where your friends first, and you kind of have some time to get to know each other are much more successful. Like I've never dated on a dating app. because I've been with my partner for quite a long time. And I can't imagine it because I don't really want, I don't want to be judged in such a small pace of time because, you know, yeah, it's just hideous. I don't like the set.
Speaker #1
I tried. I did the dating app. Did you? It wasn't even that people look different. Like when, you know, from the pictures they posted, it was their energy was different. Yeah. They presented as one way online. But then when you were in person, it was this completely different. kind of detached person and I just think you can't get an energetic read like people complain about the pictures but I think what they're actually feeling and it's the energy behind it oh right yeah you don't think someone is yeah you're so so right I think you're absolutely right because also stills don't
Speaker #0
really give you a flavor of anything you know it's just kind of like that that sort of frozen thing where they're trying to do their best face But I once, you've just reminded me of a funny story. I had a girlfriend of mine who was having a bit of an affair with this man. And he really liked writing to her. So she asked me to write on her behalf. Oh, my God, I'm still ashamed to this day. So I started writing. And then I really enjoyed what he was sending back. And then we really got into it. She knew that it was happening. She'd be like, yeah. And all along the way, I was just like, this is awful. We are, it's catfishing now. But we didn't have a term for it. But I just remember thinking, this is awful because this is not true. And he's going to find out. It's just going to be really bad. And I'm setting you up for something that will never deliver. And the whole thing, I actually had to just stop and kind of run away from the whole situation. And he used to say to her when they met, he used to say, you're so different.
Speaker #1
It's like, oh, weird. So straight. Wait, you need to write about that. Like, that's a novel.
Speaker #0
That's funny. Well, I do. I do. So as you know, I wrote the book and everyone keeps saying, what about the next book? And I don't have a second book right now on wellness. I just think the world is such a mess. I'm not sure it needs another wellness book from me right now. And also my work is practical. So I'm putting lots of my attention into actually making little tools that people can listen to and do something with. So lots of somatic meditations and somatic lessons. But I do have a novel because I've been involved in the wellness world for quite a bit. And I've worked across four different industries. But I've met so many people whose actions and their words do not align. I think they're such a great, and they're really hilarious characters. And I just think those are great. So that story will come in somewhere.
Speaker #1
We should swap stories someday. So we could have a field day.
Speaker #0
I'm sure we could have a field day.
Speaker #1
I feel that for you. I really do. And when you were talking about the writing, I'm like, she needs to write a novel. Sometimes I get little downloads for people's creative lives, and I feel like it will be very successful.
Speaker #0
I feel like I really want to, too, because I've just met such great characters and I've got such interesting things to say about them. So I will do it one day. I'm going to start making some notes. So thank you for that encouragement. Good. Do you offer any little short courses on how to reboot your creativity?
Speaker #1
I'm working on a few right now. Yeah, good idea. But yeah, I'm working on a masterclass and then a longer term class as well. Both be just always on so people can buy them and then just do them at their leisure. But that's the next part of my business I want to build out and also share as an offering. One-on-one isn't right for everybody. So I want to have something where people can just tap in, enjoy it, go back to it when they feel called.
Speaker #0
And it gives them, yeah, exactly. It gives them a flavor of how you work. And, you know, it's a really good way. I do quite a bit of that. And it's a really good route into what you do. Or it might just be enough. And that's where they want to stay. And that's kind of pretty cool, too. So tell me what helps you. What are you protecting these days? I think you've mentioned it. Now you're with baby. What are you protecting? It sounds like your time, but is there anything else?
Speaker #1
My peace, I would say. I think I sacrificed a lot of peace in the name of ambition or even just like doing the right thing. And, you know, I've had some opportunities over the past couple months where I probably could have put myself in a position that would have put me around more high profile people and maybe could have. propped me up to the next level. But I realized being in that energy would actually not be good for my peace. And I had to, especially because I was pregnant, prioritize that. I'm also no longer interested in trying to crunch myself up and get seen in this one way in the hopes that maybe they'll see the full of me. Like,
Speaker #0
yeah,
Speaker #1
I'm not doing that anymore. If someone sees me great, If they don't, that's fine too. I no longer am here to convince you. I just want to feel good within myself and share my true self. And whoever's on board, amazing. Whoever's not, that's okay too.
Speaker #0
I think that's also, as you get older, you get more in your power and more kind of like, yeah, I really know who I am. And I just, I don't want to play that game. Plus, you know, a lot of people I see are in that game and it really messes with them. You know, it's a really tough game. that there's always a price to pay.
Speaker #1
It doesn't really make you any happier. I think at some point you have to look at the actions you've taken and say, did that move the needle for me in my overall happiness or satisfaction with life? Yeah. And if the answer is repeatedly no, then you have to evolve your behaviors and your actions.
Speaker #0
Yeah, completely. Of course, that is, you know, how we evolve, right? Right. If we always stay the same, then it's kind of where's the learning?
Speaker #1
Yeah. Why are we here?
Speaker #0
Why are we here? Is there anything that you want to tell us about that you're working on?
Speaker #1
Yes. So definitely my creative coaching. If you're interested in that, I would love to connect with you. There's more information on my website, Lauren LaGrasso.
Speaker #0
I also have all your details underneath the video.
Speaker #1
Putting my details in. So I also have a sub stack if you want to check that out. I've been into writing. I like, he'd want to write a book. So That is on the goals list over the next couple years. And my speaking. If you know anybody who is looking for a speaker to talk on the topics of creativity and self-development, leadership, I would love to come in and do that. I've been speaking at different companies, conferences, colleges, and that has been so much fun. I also incorporate my music, which is amazing, and have the audience sing with me, which is my favorite. And the podcast, Unleash Your Inner Creative. Out. New episodes are out every Thursday. And that's always, start with the Heads episode. It's like a great way to get in because you already know her. And then if you want to stick around, you can become a creative cutie.
Speaker #0
Yeah. I love your episodes. I love your podcast. Every time I need some inspiration, I will listen to an episode. I think they're fab. I think it's a really great thing to put out in the world. So thank you for what you do. Thank you for joining me this morning, Lauren. And I'm sure we will be in touch.
Speaker #1
Okay. I hope so. You're awesome. And thank you for having me. And thank you for allowing me to connect with your community. They seem amazing.
Speaker #0
You're so kind. Take care. Lots of love. Enjoy your day. Bye-bye.
Speaker #1
Thank you. Bye-bye. Thank you so much for listening to this very special, unconventional episode of Unleash. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Love Nahid. Again, if you're free in late June or early July, definitely check out her retreat in Greece. The link is in the show notes. And thank you again for listening. If you like what you heard, feel free to rate and review, share the show with a friend and post about it on social media. If you do post about it, tag me at Lauren LaGrasso and at Unleash Your Inner Creative, and I will repost to share my gratitude. I love you and I believe in you. And I'll talk with you next week.

About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

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About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

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Description

We also get into:

Why high achievers struggle to metabolize stress
The “second arrow of suffering” and how we make things worse than they are
How to stop absorbing other people’s energy and emotions
My new morning routine for regulating my nervous system
Pregnancy, ambition, and learning to actually take care of myself
What it really looks like to step into a new chapter of your life (for me entrepreneurship and Motherhood)

This conversation is honest, grounding, and deeply human. If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or like life has been heavier than it needs to be… this one is for you.

You can connect with Nahid and learn more about her work: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/

Check out her retreat in Greece: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/thesootheweekinlefkadagreece

Check out my Substack: https://substack.com/@laurenlograsso

✨ Want to work together? Email me at Lauren.LoGrasso@gmail.com or visit https://www.laurenlograsso.com/contact/ to book a free 15-minute discovery call.

Follow the show: @unleashyourinnercreative

Follow me: @LaurenLoGrasso

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Transcription

Speaker #0
Hello, my sweet creative cutie. I hope you're doing well today. I have a special treat for you on today's show. I'm doing something a little different than I normally do. So last week, I had the pleasure of sitting down with friend of the show and past Unleash Your Inner Creative guest, Nahid De Beljon. And Nahid is an expert in nervous system soothing. She wrote an incredible book called Soothe. You should definitely go back and check out our episode together. But this past week... I had her interview me. The tables were turned. And it was such a beautiful, heartfelt, insightful conversation that after we wrapped, I felt compelled to reach out to her and say, hey, would you be okay with me sharing that with my listeners? It was just really honest, a lot of good takeaways. It was a breath of fresh air, honestly. Like, it's wonderful to be able to just drop in with someone and talk heart to heart, and especially about difficult things and... creative things and things revolving around self-development and career and all of that. So I am going to share that with you today. So this is from the Substack Live we did last Thursday, a week ago today, and I think you're going to love it. We get into my career, what I am trying to do in the next phase of my life, going into entrepreneurship, how I'm feeling about motherhood, how I'm now looking at stress and rest, and And... It's really just a great chat. She's delightful. Just listening to her voice makes me feel calmer. And I know that it will do the same for you. Yeah. I just think it brings out like me being with her brought out really interesting textures and my personality and great things that I know you're going to get a lot out of. So I'm excited for you to listen to it. Also, if you feel like you also get a sense of calm just from listening to Nahid, just imagine working with her. She is so incredible and she's doing this retreat I wanted to tell you about. She's got three spaces left on her June 27th through July 4th retreat. It's in Greece. So if you're looking for a little European getaway and to learn how to soothe your nervous system, what could be better? Literally, what could be better? Go ahead and check that out. I'm going to put the link in the show notes. So go soothe yourself with Nahid. But before you do that, listen to this incredible conversation. And have a great rest of your week.
Speaker #1
Welcome to this chat with me today. Thanks for joining me all the way from LA.
Speaker #0
Oh, thank you for having me. Happy to be here. From anywhere.
Speaker #1
So let me just go through all the things that you've done. You're a podcasting, You're a world's traveler across podcasting, creative coaching. And you have an... Webby award-winning podcast Unleash Your Inner Creative, which you were very kind to invite me to. Tell us a little bit about how we find you today. What's on your mind?
Speaker #0
Well, that's a great question. I have a lot of things on my mind all the time at once, but I would say the biggest takeaway from this week is I have realized the past couple weeks, I have not been metabolizing stress very well. And so the past two and a half days, I've changed my approach and it has worked.
Speaker #1
And what were you doing before and what are you doing now?
Speaker #0
Before I was just letting every stressor just take me on a journey and not really being thoughtful about it or realizing like, you know, I've heard someone say recently emergencies usually have ambulances. And I was letting other people's... perceived emergencies become my own and just go on the whole journey and taking too much responsibility for other people's mistakes. Or even if you're in a leadership role, like I do think you have to obviously be accountable if the team isn't working as well as you want. But taking what is your part and leaving the rest on the table, I think is important to de-stressing and living well.
Speaker #1
So important. And it's something I often talk to my clients about. They're often really responsible and... With that responsibility also comes this idea that everyone else is an idiot and they can't do things as well as them. So they don't let go of things. And whenever they do ask other people to do things, they want it done to their standards. I'm like, it doesn't matter. Let it go. You know, that's kind of setting yourself up to fail and to be overwhelmed with responsibility for the world. You just can't possibly hold it all. So let people do it. things their way and don't be so fussed about it. You know, don't worry so much about the outcome because it's going to be okay. You know, you don't have to be responsible for everyone.
Speaker #0
Yeah. And you can't be, and honestly, frankly, you shouldn't be like, you know, people need to make their own mistakes and live their own lives. And yeah, I would say I've definitely struggled with codependency over the course of my life. And over the past couple of weeks, I've had, I've fallen back into some of my own ways, old ways. And I had a wake up call cause you know, I'm pregnant. And on Wednesday, I woke up, you know, after a stressful night and I, or it's Tuesday. And I was spotting and it was like, I don't think it was attached, but it was an important wake up call literally from my body, from my baby being like, Hey, it's not that deep. Take a breath, take care of yourself, take care of me. And thankfully by the end of the night, I did end up going to the hospital by the end of the night, it had gone away. The baby was fine. The heartbeat was strong, all that stuff. But it was like, I, unfortunately I needed that wake up call for me to realize, Oh, I have been making things way bigger and harder than they need to be. Like if you need to deal with something that's difficult, deal with it, but you don't have to add all the meaning to it. And that's what I've been doing these past couple of weeks. So I've been trying to subtract the meaning from difficulties and also to give myself a stronger morning practice so I don't end up going on that unbelievable journey.
Speaker #1
Brilliant. There's a really lovely Buddhist parable that I repeat often and it's the two arrows of suffering. Do you know it?
Speaker #0
No, I don't.
Speaker #1
Oh, it's so great. So the first arrow of suffering is the event itself. It's bad enough. But then the second arrow of suffering is all the stories that you create around it.
Speaker #0
Yes.
Speaker #1
Yes. So it's like we don't need that second arrow of suffering. So tell me about your new morning routine and then we'll get into who you are, what you do and all the rest of it. But I set up this series really because I just think generally I love chatting. I love women. I love chatting I love finding out people's stories But also I think in turbulent times, I want to kind of reach out with people that I feel I connect with and who is doing good things because it just gives us all solidarity and makes us understand there's other people who feel like we do all around the world. So I just think it's such a nice way to connect. But I'm really interested in what you have changed then. What's your new morning routine?
Speaker #0
Yeah. So I was doing this manifestation meditation every morning when I woke up. And it's great. And I love it. It's been wonderful. It's been very good to me. But it was like, clearly, that's not the priority in this moment. You need to learn to relax. So I've shifted to doing ones that are about relaxing, reconnecting with the body. I do a lot of guided meditations. And then one on self-love, because I really recognize, oh, the self-love and self-compassion piece has really been missing. I've been really ramping up my negative self-talk and being hard on myself. And that's not helping anything. So I do that. Then I was raised Catholic and I still love a lot of the Catholic practices of spirituality. So I say this beautiful prayer. It's a novena called the Sacred Heart of Jesus. And then I say this incredible prayer that is about abundance, but like more from a spiritual perspective and a holistic perspective called the Prayer of Jabez. And then I get up, I make my coffee and I journal and I do three pages of journaling. It's taken from the practice. of Julia Cameron's The Morning Pages, but I don't do it exactly the way she said. Don't tell her.
Speaker #1
It's always nice to make things your own ritual, isn't it?
Speaker #0
Yeah, yeah, exactly. I prefer to meditate first and get my bearings and reconnect myself before I do the writing. But I do that. And then I dive into my day. But I've created this container where the day isn't consuming me. I can stand on a platform of self-love and then approach the day. And again, it's been two days. Like I do usually do a variation of this, but I've been more disciplined about not looking at my phone, not engaging with email. So really making sure that that container of space when I first wake up is mine versus letting the other world dictate who I am and what I care about.
Speaker #1
Lovely. Great. What a great practice. Really super important, isn't it? To just be reflective in that really rich space of waking up after having slept.
Speaker #0
and then you're waking and it's kind of not to let too many things intrude into that so you can be really intentional for your day yeah yeah exactly and not let the other world set up your standard or let the other world yeah basically there are two worlds it's like your internal world yeah yeah yeah like not let the other world set up your standards for your day and who you're gonna be and show up as that day um because i think that has been a big part of the stress I've incurred over the last two and a half weeks is just like... going on the ride instead of being in the driver's seat.
Speaker #1
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I was talking to somebody about this this morning in that the world that we all live in. really favours exteroception, which is about the outer body. And the work that I do and the work that I think you're talking about is interoception, which is about listening to the space in the body. And we kind of need a little bit of both. And we've just geared too much towards external body and external kind of cues of who we are and what gives us satisfaction. And I think that actually is... the problem. I think that was a big problem of not having this internal kind of reference points, not really understanding truly who you are and who you want to be and how you want to move through the world intentionally.
Speaker #0
Yeah, that's my greatest lesson in life is learning to love myself for who I am, not what I do. Being internally motivated versus externally motivated. I've learned it, but I continue to learn it every single day. Of course.
Speaker #1
It's ongoing learning, isn't it? It's ongoing learning and different times in your life, you'll kind of need to lean more heavily into ritual. So who are you? What do you do? How did you get here?
Speaker #0
I moved to LA when I was 22, started out interning on the Ellen show and my path has taken so much twists and turns. But I started out as an actress here in LA. And from that, I started really auditioning a lot and it was just breaking my heart, honestly. Like I Bye. again, I had such a drive to be externally motivated that when I wasn't doing well in my acting career, I felt like I wasn't doing well as a human being. So from that heartbreak, I started writing music. I always say acting broke my heart. Music healed it. Started driving to all these gigs, playing out. I had really good success as a live musician in LA. And while I was driving to those gigs, I started listening to Sirius XM radio and just saying like, I want to be on the radio someday. I want to work at Sirius XM. I ended up getting an opportunity to do just that. I got to be an associate producer and on-air talent. Within six months, I was moved up to producer. Did that for two and a half years. Then moved on to podcasting. Started my own show, Unleash Your Inner Creative, which as you mentioned is a three-time Webby Award winner and has featured you. We have a lovely episode together. And I've produced over 30 shows, executive produced over 30 shows. Some of the biggest shows that our world has known, things that have shifted the culture, which has been amazing. Through that process of creating other people's shows and creating my own and also releasing music, I started doing creative coaching because I believe creativity is our birthright. And that when we can really access our creativity, we get to also access our full humanity. Plus, it's the antidote to AI. So it's important from multiple perspectives.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
And also doing podcast consulting. So helping indie podcasters and brands take their podcast idea or like take their existing podcasts and make it better. or take their podcast idea and bring it to full fruition. And my latest thing is also speaking. So I've been speaking out on creativity, self-development and healing. And so it's, it's really a hodgepodge of things, but all of them kind of make sense. I feel like the speaking is the greatest evolution of everything because it kind of combines everything I love into one.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Great. So I'm interested. I'm really curious because there's so many podcasts around. What makes, what makes... interesting podcast or is it the same as a successful podcast?
Speaker #0
Well, there's so much luck. So I do want to say that because that is just a truth of business, a truth of entertainment. It's a truth of like, you know, timing plays a factor into it. But I will say like there won't be a successful podcast without a very good specific idea. So when I work with people, What I do is... try to get to the bottom of what is like, who are you and what is your idea? And how do we combine those two things to differentiate this idea in the market? So I, what I call like the podcast thesis statement, which for most people, at least people, um, and brands really, it tends to be at the center of your greatest pain and your greatest joy. And so I help people figure out through their story and the story they want to tell in the show. What is that midpoint? so that they can bring something to the world that is truly their own, that is specific, and that is of service every week, both for the listener and for them.
Speaker #1
Great, great description. What about, do you think that podcast should have an end date? Because there's lots of people that have podcasts and it goes on and on and on. And then it seems like they lose their mission and then they'll just have anyone on because it's good for clickbait, because someone's really controversial. And that seems to happen quite a lot. of late because there's so much stuff going on and I think they're really good ones. are still very authentic and they're still looking for really great guests and good conversations. But I wonder if there is some sort of, and you know how TV series will have like seasons and then it's over and you kind of think sometimes, oh, I'm really glad it's over because I loved it so much and it would have just run its steam.
Speaker #0
I think that any creative project can have or should have an end date when it stops feeling exciting and fresh to the person creating it. If you're doing something just to do it, do it. Now, I'm not talking about people who are like, they need to make their living that way. But even if you do, still, I would say try to find a way to make it vital and fresh to you. Because podcasts are hard. I mean, it's an hour, but it takes so much more work to create that one hour, especially now that we're doing video podcasts, a lot of people at least. So I would say it warrants either a pause or an end date if it has become stale to you. And you have to find a way to like look at it, maybe rebranding, maybe working with someone like me and looking at like, okay, I don't feel passionate about this anymore. This doesn't feel vital to me anymore. How can I still stay true to the original promise of the show, but put something in that makes me excited? Because what I really believe is the energy behind something is just as important, if not more important than the show or the project itself. And if the energy behind something is stale or negative or resentful, I've seen huge shows go from being like top of the zeitgeist, getting millions of downloads to really losing a lot of steam and a lot of momentum and a lot of downloads because the energy behind it was no longer. Either there was a problem with the team, there was a problem with the host, both. So people can feel that. I don't think that people who are creating understand that people, they don't know what they're feeling, but they're feeling the intention and the foundation that that thing is built upon. which is why when I coach someone or produce someone, I'm not just talking about the ideas. I'm also talking about like the health of the team, the health of the host. Like it's way bigger than just what the ideas and what is actually produced each week. It's also how you do it.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Interesting. And have you, are you normally called in at the beginning of something or do you come in to change things around or do you, are you called in any part of that process?
Speaker #0
Any part of the process? It's really fun to do it from the beginning because you get to see basically from a seed, a planting seed to the full plant grows and the garden starts growing. So that's really fun. But one of my most recent clients, she already has a podcast and she wanted to bring me in to refine it, to get her team together, to help her budget get a little bit more allocated in a way that's going to make more sense. So I can come in at all different angles and all different times. But it is really fun to go from the beginning because you get to build something together.
Speaker #1
And how do you split up your time between all the things that you do? Because your own podcast must take up quite a lot of time.
Speaker #0
It does. I would say it takes up a lot less time now than it used to just because I've gotten so good at running it. And I really know what it takes from running all these other shows. But I don't have a specific methodology that I use week after week. I kind of more flow through and just make sure I get everything done that I need to. I do teach course and also like a workshop on how to balance as a multi-passionate creative and I do have a way of doing that in times when I need to be more disciplined I will engage with that which again it's kind of woo-woo but basically you list everything you want to do or everything you're doing and then you feel into it and just ask yourself what percentage of time should I be spending on each and write it down next to each item and it's wild it always comes out to 100% total. And then you enact it and decide how you want to enact it. it. So is it like everything happens each day of the week? Do you focus on certain things, certain days or certain times? And so when I am in a more packed schedule time, I will do that. But right now I'm kind of just flowing through and that's working for me.
Speaker #1
Great. I mean, it doesn't sound woo-woo at all because my work is all about listening to the signals from your body and really attuning yourself, being in much better relationship with yourself and it will pull you towards the things that you want to do and want to spend your time doing and pull you away from the things that you kind of need to eventually get rid of so your nervous system will completely respond to environments you feel really comfortable with and environments you don't and once you listen in you'll be really you become really attuned to that and so you can build a really lovely life for yourself based on how you sense things so actually I don't think it's we were at all, I think there's quite a lot of science behind it.
Speaker #0
Yay. I love being tired. I mean, I'm just following my gut out here. So it's nice when somebody confirms that the gut was correct.
Speaker #1
The gut generally is correct. What does feeling like yourself in your body feel like? Which might be an odd question. Now you're pregnant. How has it changed for you?
Speaker #0
Yeah, well, I've got a buddy now.
Speaker #1
How do you know you're steady with this new environment you created?
Speaker #0
It's crazy. I mean, almost every day I'm like, I can't believe I'm pregnant. Like, I can't think about the fact that there is a being inside of me too much or else I get freaked out. I don't think people talk about that enough.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
but I think it's it's acknowledging it from at least in this moment it's like okay I know I'm sharing my body right now which by the way all mothers you are so kind to share your body like I had no idea until I went through this how kind we all are and how amazing women are we are the creators of the earth um but it really I think it's like for me just listening right now because I did have that incident that happened earlier this week and it was because I was pushing, pushing, pushing. I cannot push the way I used to. And maybe this is the way I was always supposed to be, honestly, because I've pushed myself and not listened and pushed down a lot in order to achieve over the course of my life. And I've gotten better, but I think old habits die hard and they keep coming up during times of stress. So one thing I've noticed is like, since I've been pregnant, I can't just like catapult myself out of bed and speed through my morning, I have to take it easy. I have to, you know, okay, like. the energy can't all be up here. It has to come down. I have to walk a little bit more slowly. If I'm feeling exhausted, I have to lay down. I've never been a napper. My mom told me even when I was a little kid, I never napped. But I'm not napping, but I will allow myself now to lay down in the middle of the day because my body told me to. So having this life growing inside of me has caused me to actually know I need to take better care of myself than I've been doing. and I want to continue that journey postpartum, like once the baby's out of the womb, because I don't think you can be a good mom or a good leader or, you know, show up fully as yourself if you're not tending to yourself. And I think that is what I'm realizing in this moment in my body is how much tending I need. And like, that's okay.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Yeah. Lovely. And also everybody in environment. will respond to you being well regulated and tending to yourself, including your baby when he or she comes, you know, whatever your, you create the environment for them to really thrive in and you're already creating it now and they're picking up on things. So for many, many reasons, it's super important to listen in.
Speaker #0
Yeah. It's pretty cool. Like I, it is a little boy and I talk to him sometimes, like I'll put my hand on my... stomach and I'll be like we're gonna do this together and I'm gonna take you on the road when I do speeches they're like and he starts kicking and I get chills on my legs so it's pretty amazing like the communication that's already happening and that you know you can feel when you're in flow with it yeah
Speaker #1
oh how lovely um so in terms what does your day look like these days then now that you're how far gone are you so far gone
Speaker #0
I am 21 weeks. So I think that's four and a half months, almost five. My days are, like I said, I start out with my morning practice. Then I am producing a show right now. So I go into production mode. I tell my team like what their day's worth of tasks are, taking meetings throughout the day. I mean, I mostly work from home. Once in a while, I'll go into the studio, but it's mostly from home. So I'm blessed in that way. Where in LA do you live,
Speaker #1
Lauren?
Speaker #0
Toluca Lake, which is near Studio City, Burbank area. And I love going on walks in my neighborhood. Like sometimes I allow myself to do that in the middle of the day, especially when I've been like on the screen too much. Taking my coaching clients and my consulting clients and then doing speeches. I have one coming up in May. So it just depends on the day of the week. But flowing through work and like... trying to listen to myself when I need to take a break and do that.
Speaker #1
And are you strict about having weekends off?
Speaker #0
No, not strict about it. Although I will say this past weekend, I really realized, again, I needed to take that mental break and it made a huge difference. The hard thing for me has been over the course of really the last five years, I've been building a business while I've been working a full-time job. So it can kind of lead to this feeling of If I don't do stuff on the weekends, then I'm going to get behind during the week, which can be true. But also, I do think you need to turn off your brain sometimes and rest is part of the creative process. So when I feel myself into that burnout, I'll take time off. I'm really excited to see how my life and career shifts after I'm no longer like toggling between worlds, which will be interesting.
Speaker #1
And when did you stop working full time?
Speaker #0
When did I start? I have been working full time for 11 years and like it's various capacities of various companies. So I've been doing that at this company for eight years. And so at the end of April, I'm going full time into the unknown, doing Lauren LaGrasso productions.
Speaker #1
And I'm really excited about it. Yes, it's so exciting. So exciting. When you are coaching your clients, I'm really interested in your creative coaching. I find that really inspiring because I think at times of just such chaos in the world, creativity can really help to ground you and root you and anchor you. So tell me a little bit about how you got started in that. What's your advice for creatives who aren't feeling very creative right now?
Speaker #0
Yeah. Well, I got started because of my podcast and because I do believe repressed creativity causes a lot of the world suffering. I think I know because of the data says so. We are all born creative. But then life, fear, trauma, all these things can knock it out of us. And so I started the show in part because I knew AI was coming. because you know I knew that with AI that I heard a statistic saying like in 50 years, 85% of all jobs will require creativity. So it's a very vital life and business skill. And also I believe it is every human being's birthright and an innate and heart of the human experience. So when I've seen people repress their creativity or push it aside, I've seen them get depressed. I've seen them get sick. I've seen them gray out. You know, when somebody goes from colorful, bubbly person to just kind of everything is muted. And so I started creative coaching just because I think people deserve to be creative, to be expressed in the world, to get back to what their younger self knew. And so my approach to that is really three-tiered. So it starts out with healing. And what I believe is that when we can get back to the younger self and heal creative wounds, which is like a lowercase t trauma that happened maybe when you were in school. school and the teacher shamed you because you didn't read a sentence well, or you went to sing and you were a little bit off and you were made to feel like you were bad. So we go back to moments like that and heal them because people don't realize they're like subconsciously playing them out in their lives. We also go back to the joy and to the play and start reintegrating some of those things that people loved as kids or young adults into their current life. So the first part is really reclaiming the younger creative. healing that part of themselves and getting integrated in that way. The second part is, again, the thesis statement. I'm very much into like mission statements for your creativity or for your shows. So we find out what their creative mission statement is and then list out their passions. And from there, if they don't know, we find out what their top project is going to be. So we take the passions, put them through the filter of the thesis statement, figure out a project. And then from there, the last part is very tactical. So helping them figure out what do they need to do from A to Z to launch this project out into the world. So that's the methodology. It starts out with healing. It goes into like healing meets practical. And then it goes into extremely practical.
Speaker #1
And what sort of people are coming to you for that?
Speaker #0
All sorts. writers. I had a person who just like was she called herself a generalist. She did all kinds of different things and she wanted to figure out what was her main project. She had supported a lot of other people in her life. So what was the thing that she wanted to do? I would say that's a through line with everyone that comes to me for creative coaching is they've either kind of been scattered or they've poured into other people and it's finally time for them to start pouring into themselves the same way. and figuring out how they want to show up and like how they can show up in the world in a way that feels integrated, less scary, and just really right. So it's people often who also are in the middle of a big career transition and are looking to do things differently this time. But yeah, all kinds of beautiful people come my way.
Speaker #1
Sounds great. And how long is the process?
Speaker #0
It depends on what the project is, but I do say like a minimum of three months because it's really hard to get anything done in less time than that. But I really recommend six if you can or longer.
Speaker #1
Great. And so going back to identity, we were talking about that earlier. My work is very involved in identity. I actually think your nervous system. is your identity because it's formed by experience so far to date. So tell me something that you have stopped identifying with.
Speaker #0
and how that shifted for you
Speaker #1
I think for me it's always a journey I'm I'm not like completely unidentified with these things because again like when you are wound up a certain way it's hard to fully undo it forever like set in stone you know like I always think in my mind I'm like one day I'll be healed and I'm like that's not how it works it's just a send like so
Speaker #0
We are all in process.
Speaker #1
Yes, we're all in process. So just wanted to caveat it with that. But I think the biggest thing really is that external validation that like achievement can save me, that I will get this thing and then I will be saved. So I no longer believe that. I now know it is an inside job and I can be highly ambitious. But at the end of the day, my ambition is just what takes me on the journey. It's all about how I feel on the inside. as I'm pursuing those things. And whether or not I ever get there is meaningless as long as I don't say no to myself.
Speaker #0
Lovely. And what do you think we've normalized in the world that actually isn't working?
Speaker #1
Oh, where to begin, Nahid?
Speaker #0
Thought that might be rich.
Speaker #1
Yeah, I mean, living in the United States, it's pretty, you and I connected because I've been speaking up and I really appreciate the support you've been giving. our country and the people that have been speaking up here um uh cruelty i think one number one that's a big one right now um in the united states especially being pregnant i'm thinking a lot about how much we just leave people to fend for themselves like we're supposed to be the richest country but we don't have healthcare and
Speaker #0
you don't have maternity leave it's when When I found that out, I was just like, I'm sorry, what? Because. I cannot believe that we have lauded the U.S. for so long and you do not have basic health care and you do not have maternity leave for women who give, you know, they give life. Yeah. It's crazy.
Speaker #1
It is so wild. So I would just say in this country right now, what is at the top of my mind is cruelty. Like somehow many of the people in power have convinced the citizens. that they don't deserve these, that these are luxuries and that it's a handout when every other major country, every other westernized country has this. And even ones that aren't rich have this. I mean, it is absolutely wild. So I would definitely say that is top of mind, just cruelty in general, but then how it manifests as well.
Speaker #0
And how are you finding hope at times like this?
Speaker #1
People. Because people are good. And I think when we have corrupt leadership and we have people making decisions that feel so deeply cruel and are actually adversely affecting our lives in a way that we feel, it can be easy to then cast out all of humanity. But it's really not true. The vast majority of people are good. The vast majority of people want good things. The vast majority of people lead with love. And so... I try to look for those people, look up to those people, emulate them and connect with them because people are good despite all the cruelty in the world.
Speaker #0
You know what? You are so right. And something that I always say to everyone as well, I've traveled a little bit by myself in different places. And, you know, I'd heard about, I've been to New York quite a few times. I'd heard about LA, had an idea about LA and I got there and the people were just darling. I had the most Loveliest conversations with people on the street. I was just there staying on my own. People were really kind, really connected with lots of different, you know, even people just doing their own thing on the streets. It was so lovely. And that was just a real reminder, because LA sometimes can be kind of the excesses of the world, can't it? But it was just such a lovely reminder that the people are not their governments. And there's ordinary people just wanting to have, you know, joy and creativity and... to live a life full of humanity and to really, yeah, just to kind of live well. It's just such a reassuring thing to see wherever you go in the world. And actually is the thing that also gives me a lot of hope.
Speaker #1
Yeah. I always say too, like LA natives, people who were born and raised here are so kind. I grew up in a region of the United States called the Midwest and it's known for being really nice. Like we talk like this because we smile all our words. So, um... I find people who are born and raised here, especially in the Valley, which is the area I live, are kind of like the people I grew up with. It's people who move here and then feel like they have to put on airs and be LA in order to fit in. that ruin it and give it that bad name. But the natives to LA are just like the most beautiful, kindest people. And I do think that the entertainment industry does kind of color the city and can make things feel transactional. But again, it's about looking for the people who want to build community, who want to help, who also are dreamers and want to lift up your dreams and have you lift up theirs. So I don't know. I think when we cast these major judgments over an entire place, it feels like it's like a self-protective thing or like a way we can stay in victim mode it's like well i don't have this because this place is that way or these people are but it's like that can't be true everywhere and i don't know i always say because like people complain about dating in la too and i always say what people who complained about dating in la dated each other like maybe they'd find they're part of the problem did you did you meet your husband in la i did I did. I met him, you know, through two of my best friends from childhood. I was very lucky. We just happened to be at their apartment the same night and kind of locked in on each other and became friends over the course of four months. And he's my favorite person.
Speaker #0
So I always think, I always think relationships where your friends first, and you kind of have some time to get to know each other are much more successful. Like I've never dated on a dating app. because I've been with my partner for quite a long time. And I can't imagine it because I don't really want, I don't want to be judged in such a small pace of time because, you know, yeah, it's just hideous. I don't like the set.
Speaker #1
I tried. I did the dating app. Did you? It wasn't even that people look different. Like when, you know, from the pictures they posted, it was their energy was different. Yeah. They presented as one way online. But then when you were in person, it was this completely different. kind of detached person and I just think you can't get an energetic read like people complain about the pictures but I think what they're actually feeling and it's the energy behind it oh right yeah you don't think someone is yeah you're so so right I think you're absolutely right because also stills don't
Speaker #0
really give you a flavor of anything you know it's just kind of like that that sort of frozen thing where they're trying to do their best face But I once, you've just reminded me of a funny story. I had a girlfriend of mine who was having a bit of an affair with this man. And he really liked writing to her. So she asked me to write on her behalf. Oh, my God, I'm still ashamed to this day. So I started writing. And then I really enjoyed what he was sending back. And then we really got into it. She knew that it was happening. She'd be like, yeah. And all along the way, I was just like, this is awful. We are, it's catfishing now. But we didn't have a term for it. But I just remember thinking, this is awful because this is not true. And he's going to find out. It's just going to be really bad. And I'm setting you up for something that will never deliver. And the whole thing, I actually had to just stop and kind of run away from the whole situation. And he used to say to her when they met, he used to say, you're so different.
Speaker #1
It's like, oh, weird. So straight. Wait, you need to write about that. Like, that's a novel.
Speaker #0
That's funny. Well, I do. I do. So as you know, I wrote the book and everyone keeps saying, what about the next book? And I don't have a second book right now on wellness. I just think the world is such a mess. I'm not sure it needs another wellness book from me right now. And also my work is practical. So I'm putting lots of my attention into actually making little tools that people can listen to and do something with. So lots of somatic meditations and somatic lessons. But I do have a novel because I've been involved in the wellness world for quite a bit. And I've worked across four different industries. But I've met so many people whose actions and their words do not align. I think they're such a great, and they're really hilarious characters. And I just think those are great. So that story will come in somewhere.
Speaker #1
We should swap stories someday. So we could have a field day.
Speaker #0
I'm sure we could have a field day.
Speaker #1
I feel that for you. I really do. And when you were talking about the writing, I'm like, she needs to write a novel. Sometimes I get little downloads for people's creative lives, and I feel like it will be very successful.
Speaker #0
I feel like I really want to, too, because I've just met such great characters and I've got such interesting things to say about them. So I will do it one day. I'm going to start making some notes. So thank you for that encouragement. Good. Do you offer any little short courses on how to reboot your creativity?
Speaker #1
I'm working on a few right now. Yeah, good idea. But yeah, I'm working on a masterclass and then a longer term class as well. Both be just always on so people can buy them and then just do them at their leisure. But that's the next part of my business I want to build out and also share as an offering. One-on-one isn't right for everybody. So I want to have something where people can just tap in, enjoy it, go back to it when they feel called.
Speaker #0
And it gives them, yeah, exactly. It gives them a flavor of how you work. And, you know, it's a really good way. I do quite a bit of that. And it's a really good route into what you do. Or it might just be enough. And that's where they want to stay. And that's kind of pretty cool, too. So tell me what helps you. What are you protecting these days? I think you've mentioned it. Now you're with baby. What are you protecting? It sounds like your time, but is there anything else?
Speaker #1
My peace, I would say. I think I sacrificed a lot of peace in the name of ambition or even just like doing the right thing. And, you know, I've had some opportunities over the past couple months where I probably could have put myself in a position that would have put me around more high profile people and maybe could have. propped me up to the next level. But I realized being in that energy would actually not be good for my peace. And I had to, especially because I was pregnant, prioritize that. I'm also no longer interested in trying to crunch myself up and get seen in this one way in the hopes that maybe they'll see the full of me. Like,
Speaker #0
yeah,
Speaker #1
I'm not doing that anymore. If someone sees me great, If they don't, that's fine too. I no longer am here to convince you. I just want to feel good within myself and share my true self. And whoever's on board, amazing. Whoever's not, that's okay too.
Speaker #0
I think that's also, as you get older, you get more in your power and more kind of like, yeah, I really know who I am. And I just, I don't want to play that game. Plus, you know, a lot of people I see are in that game and it really messes with them. You know, it's a really tough game. that there's always a price to pay.
Speaker #1
It doesn't really make you any happier. I think at some point you have to look at the actions you've taken and say, did that move the needle for me in my overall happiness or satisfaction with life? Yeah. And if the answer is repeatedly no, then you have to evolve your behaviors and your actions.
Speaker #0
Yeah, completely. Of course, that is, you know, how we evolve, right? Right. If we always stay the same, then it's kind of where's the learning?
Speaker #1
Yeah. Why are we here?
Speaker #0
Why are we here? Is there anything that you want to tell us about that you're working on?
Speaker #1
Yes. So definitely my creative coaching. If you're interested in that, I would love to connect with you. There's more information on my website, Lauren LaGrasso.
Speaker #0
I also have all your details underneath the video.
Speaker #1
Putting my details in. So I also have a sub stack if you want to check that out. I've been into writing. I like, he'd want to write a book. So That is on the goals list over the next couple years. And my speaking. If you know anybody who is looking for a speaker to talk on the topics of creativity and self-development, leadership, I would love to come in and do that. I've been speaking at different companies, conferences, colleges, and that has been so much fun. I also incorporate my music, which is amazing, and have the audience sing with me, which is my favorite. And the podcast, Unleash Your Inner Creative. Out. New episodes are out every Thursday. And that's always, start with the Heads episode. It's like a great way to get in because you already know her. And then if you want to stick around, you can become a creative cutie.
Speaker #0
Yeah. I love your episodes. I love your podcast. Every time I need some inspiration, I will listen to an episode. I think they're fab. I think it's a really great thing to put out in the world. So thank you for what you do. Thank you for joining me this morning, Lauren. And I'm sure we will be in touch.
Speaker #1
Okay. I hope so. You're awesome. And thank you for having me. And thank you for allowing me to connect with your community. They seem amazing.
Speaker #0
You're so kind. Take care. Lots of love. Enjoy your day. Bye-bye.
Speaker #1
Thank you. Bye-bye. Thank you so much for listening to this very special, unconventional episode of Unleash. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Love Nahid. Again, if you're free in late June or early July, definitely check out her retreat in Greece. The link is in the show notes. And thank you again for listening. If you like what you heard, feel free to rate and review, share the show with a friend and post about it on social media. If you do post about it, tag me at Lauren LaGrasso and at Unleash Your Inner Creative, and I will repost to share my gratitude. I love you and I believe in you. And I'll talk with you next week.

About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Description

We also get into:

Why high achievers struggle to metabolize stress
The “second arrow of suffering” and how we make things worse than they are
How to stop absorbing other people’s energy and emotions
My new morning routine for regulating my nervous system
Pregnancy, ambition, and learning to actually take care of myself
What it really looks like to step into a new chapter of your life (for me entrepreneurship and Motherhood)

This conversation is honest, grounding, and deeply human. If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or like life has been heavier than it needs to be… this one is for you.

You can connect with Nahid and learn more about her work: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/

Check out her retreat in Greece: https://www.thehumanmethod.co.uk/thesootheweekinlefkadagreece

Check out my Substack: https://substack.com/@laurenlograsso

✨ Want to work together? Email me at Lauren.LoGrasso@gmail.com or visit https://www.laurenlograsso.com/contact/ to book a free 15-minute discovery call.

Follow the show: @unleashyourinnercreative

Follow me: @LaurenLoGrasso

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

Transcription

Speaker #0
Hello, my sweet creative cutie. I hope you're doing well today. I have a special treat for you on today's show. I'm doing something a little different than I normally do. So last week, I had the pleasure of sitting down with friend of the show and past Unleash Your Inner Creative guest, Nahid De Beljon. And Nahid is an expert in nervous system soothing. She wrote an incredible book called Soothe. You should definitely go back and check out our episode together. But this past week... I had her interview me. The tables were turned. And it was such a beautiful, heartfelt, insightful conversation that after we wrapped, I felt compelled to reach out to her and say, hey, would you be okay with me sharing that with my listeners? It was just really honest, a lot of good takeaways. It was a breath of fresh air, honestly. Like, it's wonderful to be able to just drop in with someone and talk heart to heart, and especially about difficult things and... creative things and things revolving around self-development and career and all of that. So I am going to share that with you today. So this is from the Substack Live we did last Thursday, a week ago today, and I think you're going to love it. We get into my career, what I am trying to do in the next phase of my life, going into entrepreneurship, how I'm feeling about motherhood, how I'm now looking at stress and rest, and And... It's really just a great chat. She's delightful. Just listening to her voice makes me feel calmer. And I know that it will do the same for you. Yeah. I just think it brings out like me being with her brought out really interesting textures and my personality and great things that I know you're going to get a lot out of. So I'm excited for you to listen to it. Also, if you feel like you also get a sense of calm just from listening to Nahid, just imagine working with her. She is so incredible and she's doing this retreat I wanted to tell you about. She's got three spaces left on her June 27th through July 4th retreat. It's in Greece. So if you're looking for a little European getaway and to learn how to soothe your nervous system, what could be better? Literally, what could be better? Go ahead and check that out. I'm going to put the link in the show notes. So go soothe yourself with Nahid. But before you do that, listen to this incredible conversation. And have a great rest of your week.
Speaker #1
Welcome to this chat with me today. Thanks for joining me all the way from LA.
Speaker #0
Oh, thank you for having me. Happy to be here. From anywhere.
Speaker #1
So let me just go through all the things that you've done. You're a podcasting, You're a world's traveler across podcasting, creative coaching. And you have an... Webby award-winning podcast Unleash Your Inner Creative, which you were very kind to invite me to. Tell us a little bit about how we find you today. What's on your mind?
Speaker #0
Well, that's a great question. I have a lot of things on my mind all the time at once, but I would say the biggest takeaway from this week is I have realized the past couple weeks, I have not been metabolizing stress very well. And so the past two and a half days, I've changed my approach and it has worked.
Speaker #1
And what were you doing before and what are you doing now?
Speaker #0
Before I was just letting every stressor just take me on a journey and not really being thoughtful about it or realizing like, you know, I've heard someone say recently emergencies usually have ambulances. And I was letting other people's... perceived emergencies become my own and just go on the whole journey and taking too much responsibility for other people's mistakes. Or even if you're in a leadership role, like I do think you have to obviously be accountable if the team isn't working as well as you want. But taking what is your part and leaving the rest on the table, I think is important to de-stressing and living well.
Speaker #1
So important. And it's something I often talk to my clients about. They're often really responsible and... With that responsibility also comes this idea that everyone else is an idiot and they can't do things as well as them. So they don't let go of things. And whenever they do ask other people to do things, they want it done to their standards. I'm like, it doesn't matter. Let it go. You know, that's kind of setting yourself up to fail and to be overwhelmed with responsibility for the world. You just can't possibly hold it all. So let people do it. things their way and don't be so fussed about it. You know, don't worry so much about the outcome because it's going to be okay. You know, you don't have to be responsible for everyone.
Speaker #0
Yeah. And you can't be, and honestly, frankly, you shouldn't be like, you know, people need to make their own mistakes and live their own lives. And yeah, I would say I've definitely struggled with codependency over the course of my life. And over the past couple of weeks, I've had, I've fallen back into some of my own ways, old ways. And I had a wake up call cause you know, I'm pregnant. And on Wednesday, I woke up, you know, after a stressful night and I, or it's Tuesday. And I was spotting and it was like, I don't think it was attached, but it was an important wake up call literally from my body, from my baby being like, Hey, it's not that deep. Take a breath, take care of yourself, take care of me. And thankfully by the end of the night, I did end up going to the hospital by the end of the night, it had gone away. The baby was fine. The heartbeat was strong, all that stuff. But it was like, I, unfortunately I needed that wake up call for me to realize, Oh, I have been making things way bigger and harder than they need to be. Like if you need to deal with something that's difficult, deal with it, but you don't have to add all the meaning to it. And that's what I've been doing these past couple of weeks. So I've been trying to subtract the meaning from difficulties and also to give myself a stronger morning practice so I don't end up going on that unbelievable journey.
Speaker #1
Brilliant. There's a really lovely Buddhist parable that I repeat often and it's the two arrows of suffering. Do you know it?
Speaker #0
No, I don't.
Speaker #1
Oh, it's so great. So the first arrow of suffering is the event itself. It's bad enough. But then the second arrow of suffering is all the stories that you create around it.
Speaker #0
Yes.
Speaker #1
Yes. So it's like we don't need that second arrow of suffering. So tell me about your new morning routine and then we'll get into who you are, what you do and all the rest of it. But I set up this series really because I just think generally I love chatting. I love women. I love chatting I love finding out people's stories But also I think in turbulent times, I want to kind of reach out with people that I feel I connect with and who is doing good things because it just gives us all solidarity and makes us understand there's other people who feel like we do all around the world. So I just think it's such a nice way to connect. But I'm really interested in what you have changed then. What's your new morning routine?
Speaker #0
Yeah. So I was doing this manifestation meditation every morning when I woke up. And it's great. And I love it. It's been wonderful. It's been very good to me. But it was like, clearly, that's not the priority in this moment. You need to learn to relax. So I've shifted to doing ones that are about relaxing, reconnecting with the body. I do a lot of guided meditations. And then one on self-love, because I really recognize, oh, the self-love and self-compassion piece has really been missing. I've been really ramping up my negative self-talk and being hard on myself. And that's not helping anything. So I do that. Then I was raised Catholic and I still love a lot of the Catholic practices of spirituality. So I say this beautiful prayer. It's a novena called the Sacred Heart of Jesus. And then I say this incredible prayer that is about abundance, but like more from a spiritual perspective and a holistic perspective called the Prayer of Jabez. And then I get up, I make my coffee and I journal and I do three pages of journaling. It's taken from the practice. of Julia Cameron's The Morning Pages, but I don't do it exactly the way she said. Don't tell her.
Speaker #1
It's always nice to make things your own ritual, isn't it?
Speaker #0
Yeah, yeah, exactly. I prefer to meditate first and get my bearings and reconnect myself before I do the writing. But I do that. And then I dive into my day. But I've created this container where the day isn't consuming me. I can stand on a platform of self-love and then approach the day. And again, it's been two days. Like I do usually do a variation of this, but I've been more disciplined about not looking at my phone, not engaging with email. So really making sure that that container of space when I first wake up is mine versus letting the other world dictate who I am and what I care about.
Speaker #1
Lovely. Great. What a great practice. Really super important, isn't it? To just be reflective in that really rich space of waking up after having slept.
Speaker #0
and then you're waking and it's kind of not to let too many things intrude into that so you can be really intentional for your day yeah yeah exactly and not let the other world set up your standard or let the other world yeah basically there are two worlds it's like your internal world yeah yeah yeah like not let the other world set up your standards for your day and who you're gonna be and show up as that day um because i think that has been a big part of the stress I've incurred over the last two and a half weeks is just like... going on the ride instead of being in the driver's seat.
Speaker #1
Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I was talking to somebody about this this morning in that the world that we all live in. really favours exteroception, which is about the outer body. And the work that I do and the work that I think you're talking about is interoception, which is about listening to the space in the body. And we kind of need a little bit of both. And we've just geared too much towards external body and external kind of cues of who we are and what gives us satisfaction. And I think that actually is... the problem. I think that was a big problem of not having this internal kind of reference points, not really understanding truly who you are and who you want to be and how you want to move through the world intentionally.
Speaker #0
Yeah, that's my greatest lesson in life is learning to love myself for who I am, not what I do. Being internally motivated versus externally motivated. I've learned it, but I continue to learn it every single day. Of course.
Speaker #1
It's ongoing learning, isn't it? It's ongoing learning and different times in your life, you'll kind of need to lean more heavily into ritual. So who are you? What do you do? How did you get here?
Speaker #0
I moved to LA when I was 22, started out interning on the Ellen show and my path has taken so much twists and turns. But I started out as an actress here in LA. And from that, I started really auditioning a lot and it was just breaking my heart, honestly. Like I Bye. again, I had such a drive to be externally motivated that when I wasn't doing well in my acting career, I felt like I wasn't doing well as a human being. So from that heartbreak, I started writing music. I always say acting broke my heart. Music healed it. Started driving to all these gigs, playing out. I had really good success as a live musician in LA. And while I was driving to those gigs, I started listening to Sirius XM radio and just saying like, I want to be on the radio someday. I want to work at Sirius XM. I ended up getting an opportunity to do just that. I got to be an associate producer and on-air talent. Within six months, I was moved up to producer. Did that for two and a half years. Then moved on to podcasting. Started my own show, Unleash Your Inner Creative, which as you mentioned is a three-time Webby Award winner and has featured you. We have a lovely episode together. And I've produced over 30 shows, executive produced over 30 shows. Some of the biggest shows that our world has known, things that have shifted the culture, which has been amazing. Through that process of creating other people's shows and creating my own and also releasing music, I started doing creative coaching because I believe creativity is our birthright. And that when we can really access our creativity, we get to also access our full humanity. Plus, it's the antidote to AI. So it's important from multiple perspectives.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
And also doing podcast consulting. So helping indie podcasters and brands take their podcast idea or like take their existing podcasts and make it better. or take their podcast idea and bring it to full fruition. And my latest thing is also speaking. So I've been speaking out on creativity, self-development and healing. And so it's, it's really a hodgepodge of things, but all of them kind of make sense. I feel like the speaking is the greatest evolution of everything because it kind of combines everything I love into one.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Great. So I'm interested. I'm really curious because there's so many podcasts around. What makes, what makes... interesting podcast or is it the same as a successful podcast?
Speaker #0
Well, there's so much luck. So I do want to say that because that is just a truth of business, a truth of entertainment. It's a truth of like, you know, timing plays a factor into it. But I will say like there won't be a successful podcast without a very good specific idea. So when I work with people, What I do is... try to get to the bottom of what is like, who are you and what is your idea? And how do we combine those two things to differentiate this idea in the market? So I, what I call like the podcast thesis statement, which for most people, at least people, um, and brands really, it tends to be at the center of your greatest pain and your greatest joy. And so I help people figure out through their story and the story they want to tell in the show. What is that midpoint? so that they can bring something to the world that is truly their own, that is specific, and that is of service every week, both for the listener and for them.
Speaker #1
Great, great description. What about, do you think that podcast should have an end date? Because there's lots of people that have podcasts and it goes on and on and on. And then it seems like they lose their mission and then they'll just have anyone on because it's good for clickbait, because someone's really controversial. And that seems to happen quite a lot. of late because there's so much stuff going on and I think they're really good ones. are still very authentic and they're still looking for really great guests and good conversations. But I wonder if there is some sort of, and you know how TV series will have like seasons and then it's over and you kind of think sometimes, oh, I'm really glad it's over because I loved it so much and it would have just run its steam.
Speaker #0
I think that any creative project can have or should have an end date when it stops feeling exciting and fresh to the person creating it. If you're doing something just to do it, do it. Now, I'm not talking about people who are like, they need to make their living that way. But even if you do, still, I would say try to find a way to make it vital and fresh to you. Because podcasts are hard. I mean, it's an hour, but it takes so much more work to create that one hour, especially now that we're doing video podcasts, a lot of people at least. So I would say it warrants either a pause or an end date if it has become stale to you. And you have to find a way to like look at it, maybe rebranding, maybe working with someone like me and looking at like, okay, I don't feel passionate about this anymore. This doesn't feel vital to me anymore. How can I still stay true to the original promise of the show, but put something in that makes me excited? Because what I really believe is the energy behind something is just as important, if not more important than the show or the project itself. And if the energy behind something is stale or negative or resentful, I've seen huge shows go from being like top of the zeitgeist, getting millions of downloads to really losing a lot of steam and a lot of momentum and a lot of downloads because the energy behind it was no longer. Either there was a problem with the team, there was a problem with the host, both. So people can feel that. I don't think that people who are creating understand that people, they don't know what they're feeling, but they're feeling the intention and the foundation that that thing is built upon. which is why when I coach someone or produce someone, I'm not just talking about the ideas. I'm also talking about like the health of the team, the health of the host. Like it's way bigger than just what the ideas and what is actually produced each week. It's also how you do it.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Interesting. And have you, are you normally called in at the beginning of something or do you come in to change things around or do you, are you called in any part of that process?
Speaker #0
Any part of the process? It's really fun to do it from the beginning because you get to see basically from a seed, a planting seed to the full plant grows and the garden starts growing. So that's really fun. But one of my most recent clients, she already has a podcast and she wanted to bring me in to refine it, to get her team together, to help her budget get a little bit more allocated in a way that's going to make more sense. So I can come in at all different angles and all different times. But it is really fun to go from the beginning because you get to build something together.
Speaker #1
And how do you split up your time between all the things that you do? Because your own podcast must take up quite a lot of time.
Speaker #0
It does. I would say it takes up a lot less time now than it used to just because I've gotten so good at running it. And I really know what it takes from running all these other shows. But I don't have a specific methodology that I use week after week. I kind of more flow through and just make sure I get everything done that I need to. I do teach course and also like a workshop on how to balance as a multi-passionate creative and I do have a way of doing that in times when I need to be more disciplined I will engage with that which again it's kind of woo-woo but basically you list everything you want to do or everything you're doing and then you feel into it and just ask yourself what percentage of time should I be spending on each and write it down next to each item and it's wild it always comes out to 100% total. And then you enact it and decide how you want to enact it. it. So is it like everything happens each day of the week? Do you focus on certain things, certain days or certain times? And so when I am in a more packed schedule time, I will do that. But right now I'm kind of just flowing through and that's working for me.
Speaker #1
Great. I mean, it doesn't sound woo-woo at all because my work is all about listening to the signals from your body and really attuning yourself, being in much better relationship with yourself and it will pull you towards the things that you want to do and want to spend your time doing and pull you away from the things that you kind of need to eventually get rid of so your nervous system will completely respond to environments you feel really comfortable with and environments you don't and once you listen in you'll be really you become really attuned to that and so you can build a really lovely life for yourself based on how you sense things so actually I don't think it's we were at all, I think there's quite a lot of science behind it.
Speaker #0
Yay. I love being tired. I mean, I'm just following my gut out here. So it's nice when somebody confirms that the gut was correct.
Speaker #1
The gut generally is correct. What does feeling like yourself in your body feel like? Which might be an odd question. Now you're pregnant. How has it changed for you?
Speaker #0
Yeah, well, I've got a buddy now.
Speaker #1
How do you know you're steady with this new environment you created?
Speaker #0
It's crazy. I mean, almost every day I'm like, I can't believe I'm pregnant. Like, I can't think about the fact that there is a being inside of me too much or else I get freaked out. I don't think people talk about that enough.
Speaker #1
Yes.
Speaker #0
but I think it's it's acknowledging it from at least in this moment it's like okay I know I'm sharing my body right now which by the way all mothers you are so kind to share your body like I had no idea until I went through this how kind we all are and how amazing women are we are the creators of the earth um but it really I think it's like for me just listening right now because I did have that incident that happened earlier this week and it was because I was pushing, pushing, pushing. I cannot push the way I used to. And maybe this is the way I was always supposed to be, honestly, because I've pushed myself and not listened and pushed down a lot in order to achieve over the course of my life. And I've gotten better, but I think old habits die hard and they keep coming up during times of stress. So one thing I've noticed is like, since I've been pregnant, I can't just like catapult myself out of bed and speed through my morning, I have to take it easy. I have to, you know, okay, like. the energy can't all be up here. It has to come down. I have to walk a little bit more slowly. If I'm feeling exhausted, I have to lay down. I've never been a napper. My mom told me even when I was a little kid, I never napped. But I'm not napping, but I will allow myself now to lay down in the middle of the day because my body told me to. So having this life growing inside of me has caused me to actually know I need to take better care of myself than I've been doing. and I want to continue that journey postpartum, like once the baby's out of the womb, because I don't think you can be a good mom or a good leader or, you know, show up fully as yourself if you're not tending to yourself. And I think that is what I'm realizing in this moment in my body is how much tending I need. And like, that's okay.
Speaker #1
Yeah. Yeah. Lovely. And also everybody in environment. will respond to you being well regulated and tending to yourself, including your baby when he or she comes, you know, whatever your, you create the environment for them to really thrive in and you're already creating it now and they're picking up on things. So for many, many reasons, it's super important to listen in.
Speaker #0
Yeah. It's pretty cool. Like I, it is a little boy and I talk to him sometimes, like I'll put my hand on my... stomach and I'll be like we're gonna do this together and I'm gonna take you on the road when I do speeches they're like and he starts kicking and I get chills on my legs so it's pretty amazing like the communication that's already happening and that you know you can feel when you're in flow with it yeah
Speaker #1
oh how lovely um so in terms what does your day look like these days then now that you're how far gone are you so far gone
Speaker #0
I am 21 weeks. So I think that's four and a half months, almost five. My days are, like I said, I start out with my morning practice. Then I am producing a show right now. So I go into production mode. I tell my team like what their day's worth of tasks are, taking meetings throughout the day. I mean, I mostly work from home. Once in a while, I'll go into the studio, but it's mostly from home. So I'm blessed in that way. Where in LA do you live,
Speaker #1
Lauren?
Speaker #0
Toluca Lake, which is near Studio City, Burbank area. And I love going on walks in my neighborhood. Like sometimes I allow myself to do that in the middle of the day, especially when I've been like on the screen too much. Taking my coaching clients and my consulting clients and then doing speeches. I have one coming up in May. So it just depends on the day of the week. But flowing through work and like... trying to listen to myself when I need to take a break and do that.
Speaker #1
And are you strict about having weekends off?
Speaker #0
No, not strict about it. Although I will say this past weekend, I really realized, again, I needed to take that mental break and it made a huge difference. The hard thing for me has been over the course of really the last five years, I've been building a business while I've been working a full-time job. So it can kind of lead to this feeling of If I don't do stuff on the weekends, then I'm going to get behind during the week, which can be true. But also, I do think you need to turn off your brain sometimes and rest is part of the creative process. So when I feel myself into that burnout, I'll take time off. I'm really excited to see how my life and career shifts after I'm no longer like toggling between worlds, which will be interesting.
Speaker #1
And when did you stop working full time?
Speaker #0
When did I start? I have been working full time for 11 years and like it's various capacities of various companies. So I've been doing that at this company for eight years. And so at the end of April, I'm going full time into the unknown, doing Lauren LaGrasso productions.
Speaker #1
And I'm really excited about it. Yes, it's so exciting. So exciting. When you are coaching your clients, I'm really interested in your creative coaching. I find that really inspiring because I think at times of just such chaos in the world, creativity can really help to ground you and root you and anchor you. So tell me a little bit about how you got started in that. What's your advice for creatives who aren't feeling very creative right now?
Speaker #0
Yeah. Well, I got started because of my podcast and because I do believe repressed creativity causes a lot of the world suffering. I think I know because of the data says so. We are all born creative. But then life, fear, trauma, all these things can knock it out of us. And so I started the show in part because I knew AI was coming. because you know I knew that with AI that I heard a statistic saying like in 50 years, 85% of all jobs will require creativity. So it's a very vital life and business skill. And also I believe it is every human being's birthright and an innate and heart of the human experience. So when I've seen people repress their creativity or push it aside, I've seen them get depressed. I've seen them get sick. I've seen them gray out. You know, when somebody goes from colorful, bubbly person to just kind of everything is muted. And so I started creative coaching just because I think people deserve to be creative, to be expressed in the world, to get back to what their younger self knew. And so my approach to that is really three-tiered. So it starts out with healing. And what I believe is that when we can get back to the younger self and heal creative wounds, which is like a lowercase t trauma that happened maybe when you were in school. school and the teacher shamed you because you didn't read a sentence well, or you went to sing and you were a little bit off and you were made to feel like you were bad. So we go back to moments like that and heal them because people don't realize they're like subconsciously playing them out in their lives. We also go back to the joy and to the play and start reintegrating some of those things that people loved as kids or young adults into their current life. So the first part is really reclaiming the younger creative. healing that part of themselves and getting integrated in that way. The second part is, again, the thesis statement. I'm very much into like mission statements for your creativity or for your shows. So we find out what their creative mission statement is and then list out their passions. And from there, if they don't know, we find out what their top project is going to be. So we take the passions, put them through the filter of the thesis statement, figure out a project. And then from there, the last part is very tactical. So helping them figure out what do they need to do from A to Z to launch this project out into the world. So that's the methodology. It starts out with healing. It goes into like healing meets practical. And then it goes into extremely practical.
Speaker #1
And what sort of people are coming to you for that?
Speaker #0
All sorts. writers. I had a person who just like was she called herself a generalist. She did all kinds of different things and she wanted to figure out what was her main project. She had supported a lot of other people in her life. So what was the thing that she wanted to do? I would say that's a through line with everyone that comes to me for creative coaching is they've either kind of been scattered or they've poured into other people and it's finally time for them to start pouring into themselves the same way. and figuring out how they want to show up and like how they can show up in the world in a way that feels integrated, less scary, and just really right. So it's people often who also are in the middle of a big career transition and are looking to do things differently this time. But yeah, all kinds of beautiful people come my way.
Speaker #1
Sounds great. And how long is the process?
Speaker #0
It depends on what the project is, but I do say like a minimum of three months because it's really hard to get anything done in less time than that. But I really recommend six if you can or longer.
Speaker #1
Great. And so going back to identity, we were talking about that earlier. My work is very involved in identity. I actually think your nervous system. is your identity because it's formed by experience so far to date. So tell me something that you have stopped identifying with.
Speaker #0
and how that shifted for you
Speaker #1
I think for me it's always a journey I'm I'm not like completely unidentified with these things because again like when you are wound up a certain way it's hard to fully undo it forever like set in stone you know like I always think in my mind I'm like one day I'll be healed and I'm like that's not how it works it's just a send like so
Speaker #0
We are all in process.
Speaker #1
Yes, we're all in process. So just wanted to caveat it with that. But I think the biggest thing really is that external validation that like achievement can save me, that I will get this thing and then I will be saved. So I no longer believe that. I now know it is an inside job and I can be highly ambitious. But at the end of the day, my ambition is just what takes me on the journey. It's all about how I feel on the inside. as I'm pursuing those things. And whether or not I ever get there is meaningless as long as I don't say no to myself.
Speaker #0
Lovely. And what do you think we've normalized in the world that actually isn't working?
Speaker #1
Oh, where to begin, Nahid?
Speaker #0
Thought that might be rich.
Speaker #1
Yeah, I mean, living in the United States, it's pretty, you and I connected because I've been speaking up and I really appreciate the support you've been giving. our country and the people that have been speaking up here um uh cruelty i think one number one that's a big one right now um in the united states especially being pregnant i'm thinking a lot about how much we just leave people to fend for themselves like we're supposed to be the richest country but we don't have healthcare and
Speaker #0
you don't have maternity leave it's when When I found that out, I was just like, I'm sorry, what? Because. I cannot believe that we have lauded the U.S. for so long and you do not have basic health care and you do not have maternity leave for women who give, you know, they give life. Yeah. It's crazy.
Speaker #1
It is so wild. So I would just say in this country right now, what is at the top of my mind is cruelty. Like somehow many of the people in power have convinced the citizens. that they don't deserve these, that these are luxuries and that it's a handout when every other major country, every other westernized country has this. And even ones that aren't rich have this. I mean, it is absolutely wild. So I would definitely say that is top of mind, just cruelty in general, but then how it manifests as well.
Speaker #0
And how are you finding hope at times like this?
Speaker #1
People. Because people are good. And I think when we have corrupt leadership and we have people making decisions that feel so deeply cruel and are actually adversely affecting our lives in a way that we feel, it can be easy to then cast out all of humanity. But it's really not true. The vast majority of people are good. The vast majority of people want good things. The vast majority of people lead with love. And so... I try to look for those people, look up to those people, emulate them and connect with them because people are good despite all the cruelty in the world.
Speaker #0
You know what? You are so right. And something that I always say to everyone as well, I've traveled a little bit by myself in different places. And, you know, I'd heard about, I've been to New York quite a few times. I'd heard about LA, had an idea about LA and I got there and the people were just darling. I had the most Loveliest conversations with people on the street. I was just there staying on my own. People were really kind, really connected with lots of different, you know, even people just doing their own thing on the streets. It was so lovely. And that was just a real reminder, because LA sometimes can be kind of the excesses of the world, can't it? But it was just such a lovely reminder that the people are not their governments. And there's ordinary people just wanting to have, you know, joy and creativity and... to live a life full of humanity and to really, yeah, just to kind of live well. It's just such a reassuring thing to see wherever you go in the world. And actually is the thing that also gives me a lot of hope.
Speaker #1
Yeah. I always say too, like LA natives, people who were born and raised here are so kind. I grew up in a region of the United States called the Midwest and it's known for being really nice. Like we talk like this because we smile all our words. So, um... I find people who are born and raised here, especially in the Valley, which is the area I live, are kind of like the people I grew up with. It's people who move here and then feel like they have to put on airs and be LA in order to fit in. that ruin it and give it that bad name. But the natives to LA are just like the most beautiful, kindest people. And I do think that the entertainment industry does kind of color the city and can make things feel transactional. But again, it's about looking for the people who want to build community, who want to help, who also are dreamers and want to lift up your dreams and have you lift up theirs. So I don't know. I think when we cast these major judgments over an entire place, it feels like it's like a self-protective thing or like a way we can stay in victim mode it's like well i don't have this because this place is that way or these people are but it's like that can't be true everywhere and i don't know i always say because like people complain about dating in la too and i always say what people who complained about dating in la dated each other like maybe they'd find they're part of the problem did you did you meet your husband in la i did I did. I met him, you know, through two of my best friends from childhood. I was very lucky. We just happened to be at their apartment the same night and kind of locked in on each other and became friends over the course of four months. And he's my favorite person.
Speaker #0
So I always think, I always think relationships where your friends first, and you kind of have some time to get to know each other are much more successful. Like I've never dated on a dating app. because I've been with my partner for quite a long time. And I can't imagine it because I don't really want, I don't want to be judged in such a small pace of time because, you know, yeah, it's just hideous. I don't like the set.
Speaker #1
I tried. I did the dating app. Did you? It wasn't even that people look different. Like when, you know, from the pictures they posted, it was their energy was different. Yeah. They presented as one way online. But then when you were in person, it was this completely different. kind of detached person and I just think you can't get an energetic read like people complain about the pictures but I think what they're actually feeling and it's the energy behind it oh right yeah you don't think someone is yeah you're so so right I think you're absolutely right because also stills don't
Speaker #0
really give you a flavor of anything you know it's just kind of like that that sort of frozen thing where they're trying to do their best face But I once, you've just reminded me of a funny story. I had a girlfriend of mine who was having a bit of an affair with this man. And he really liked writing to her. So she asked me to write on her behalf. Oh, my God, I'm still ashamed to this day. So I started writing. And then I really enjoyed what he was sending back. And then we really got into it. She knew that it was happening. She'd be like, yeah. And all along the way, I was just like, this is awful. We are, it's catfishing now. But we didn't have a term for it. But I just remember thinking, this is awful because this is not true. And he's going to find out. It's just going to be really bad. And I'm setting you up for something that will never deliver. And the whole thing, I actually had to just stop and kind of run away from the whole situation. And he used to say to her when they met, he used to say, you're so different.
Speaker #1
It's like, oh, weird. So straight. Wait, you need to write about that. Like, that's a novel.
Speaker #0
That's funny. Well, I do. I do. So as you know, I wrote the book and everyone keeps saying, what about the next book? And I don't have a second book right now on wellness. I just think the world is such a mess. I'm not sure it needs another wellness book from me right now. And also my work is practical. So I'm putting lots of my attention into actually making little tools that people can listen to and do something with. So lots of somatic meditations and somatic lessons. But I do have a novel because I've been involved in the wellness world for quite a bit. And I've worked across four different industries. But I've met so many people whose actions and their words do not align. I think they're such a great, and they're really hilarious characters. And I just think those are great. So that story will come in somewhere.
Speaker #1
We should swap stories someday. So we could have a field day.
Speaker #0
I'm sure we could have a field day.
Speaker #1
I feel that for you. I really do. And when you were talking about the writing, I'm like, she needs to write a novel. Sometimes I get little downloads for people's creative lives, and I feel like it will be very successful.
Speaker #0
I feel like I really want to, too, because I've just met such great characters and I've got such interesting things to say about them. So I will do it one day. I'm going to start making some notes. So thank you for that encouragement. Good. Do you offer any little short courses on how to reboot your creativity?
Speaker #1
I'm working on a few right now. Yeah, good idea. But yeah, I'm working on a masterclass and then a longer term class as well. Both be just always on so people can buy them and then just do them at their leisure. But that's the next part of my business I want to build out and also share as an offering. One-on-one isn't right for everybody. So I want to have something where people can just tap in, enjoy it, go back to it when they feel called.
Speaker #0
And it gives them, yeah, exactly. It gives them a flavor of how you work. And, you know, it's a really good way. I do quite a bit of that. And it's a really good route into what you do. Or it might just be enough. And that's where they want to stay. And that's kind of pretty cool, too. So tell me what helps you. What are you protecting these days? I think you've mentioned it. Now you're with baby. What are you protecting? It sounds like your time, but is there anything else?
Speaker #1
My peace, I would say. I think I sacrificed a lot of peace in the name of ambition or even just like doing the right thing. And, you know, I've had some opportunities over the past couple months where I probably could have put myself in a position that would have put me around more high profile people and maybe could have. propped me up to the next level. But I realized being in that energy would actually not be good for my peace. And I had to, especially because I was pregnant, prioritize that. I'm also no longer interested in trying to crunch myself up and get seen in this one way in the hopes that maybe they'll see the full of me. Like,
Speaker #0
yeah,
Speaker #1
I'm not doing that anymore. If someone sees me great, If they don't, that's fine too. I no longer am here to convince you. I just want to feel good within myself and share my true self. And whoever's on board, amazing. Whoever's not, that's okay too.
Speaker #0
I think that's also, as you get older, you get more in your power and more kind of like, yeah, I really know who I am. And I just, I don't want to play that game. Plus, you know, a lot of people I see are in that game and it really messes with them. You know, it's a really tough game. that there's always a price to pay.
Speaker #1
It doesn't really make you any happier. I think at some point you have to look at the actions you've taken and say, did that move the needle for me in my overall happiness or satisfaction with life? Yeah. And if the answer is repeatedly no, then you have to evolve your behaviors and your actions.
Speaker #0
Yeah, completely. Of course, that is, you know, how we evolve, right? Right. If we always stay the same, then it's kind of where's the learning?
Speaker #1
Yeah. Why are we here?
Speaker #0
Why are we here? Is there anything that you want to tell us about that you're working on?
Speaker #1
Yes. So definitely my creative coaching. If you're interested in that, I would love to connect with you. There's more information on my website, Lauren LaGrasso.
Speaker #0
I also have all your details underneath the video.
Speaker #1
Putting my details in. So I also have a sub stack if you want to check that out. I've been into writing. I like, he'd want to write a book. So That is on the goals list over the next couple years. And my speaking. If you know anybody who is looking for a speaker to talk on the topics of creativity and self-development, leadership, I would love to come in and do that. I've been speaking at different companies, conferences, colleges, and that has been so much fun. I also incorporate my music, which is amazing, and have the audience sing with me, which is my favorite. And the podcast, Unleash Your Inner Creative. Out. New episodes are out every Thursday. And that's always, start with the Heads episode. It's like a great way to get in because you already know her. And then if you want to stick around, you can become a creative cutie.
Speaker #0
Yeah. I love your episodes. I love your podcast. Every time I need some inspiration, I will listen to an episode. I think they're fab. I think it's a really great thing to put out in the world. So thank you for what you do. Thank you for joining me this morning, Lauren. And I'm sure we will be in touch.
Speaker #1
Okay. I hope so. You're awesome. And thank you for having me. And thank you for allowing me to connect with your community. They seem amazing.
Speaker #0
You're so kind. Take care. Lots of love. Enjoy your day. Bye-bye.
Speaker #1
Thank you. Bye-bye. Thank you so much for listening to this very special, unconventional episode of Unleash. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. Love Nahid. Again, if you're free in late June or early July, definitely check out her retreat in Greece. The link is in the show notes. And thank you again for listening. If you like what you heard, feel free to rate and review, share the show with a friend and post about it on social media. If you do post about it, tag me at Lauren LaGrasso and at Unleash Your Inner Creative, and I will repost to share my gratitude. I love you and I believe in you. And I'll talk with you next week.

About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

About Unleash Your Inner Creative with Lauren LoGrasso (A Creativity Podcast)

New episodes are out every Wednesday - follow, rate and review wherever you get your podcasts :)

Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.

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