- Speaker #0
society can so tend to focus on youth and fertility and there's so much media and marketing around that it then made menopause seem like that's the end of your life and it's it's a stage of loss as opposed to you know I see it as this stage and this is where the both comes in that it can be a totally empowering stage in a woman's life. So just like it is for when teenagers get their periods, that's at stage that, and this is just the same on sort of the other end.
- Speaker #1
Welcome to It's Both, the podcast where we explore the messy, beautiful contradictions of being human. I'm your host, Nikki P, and each week I sit down with real people navigating life's complexities. Those moments when life isn't just one thing. It's so many. Today we're talking about a topic that doesn't get nearly enough space or compassion, menopause. Whether you're in it, near it, have someone you love who's going through it, or you're just wondering what's ahead, this episode is for you. Today I'm talking to Susie Beaumont. Not only did Susie study sustainable nutrition at Harvard University, but she's also an internationally trained and accredited life coach who specializes in menopause coaching. After walking through her own rocky journey with perimenopause, Susie found purpose in guiding women to not just survive this season but to thrive in it we talk about the grief that can surface during menopause the cultural silence that makes so many women feel alone and how to advocate for yourself emotionally physically and even spiritually during this massive shift susie also shares her super practical insights including how nutrition boundaries and mindset can all play a role in helping you feel more grounded and more in control whether you're navigating hormonal shifts to yourself supporting someone who is or you're just curious how we show up for ourselves when everything feels. upside down, this one is for you. So let's jump in. Welcome Susie. It's so good to have you here.
- Speaker #0
Thanks Nikki. It's great to be here.
- Speaker #1
I'm really excited to talk today and this conversation around menopause and just hearing about your experience with kind of the tension or the bothness with that. But before we jump in, I was hoping you could just tell me and everybody else a little bit about who Susie is.
- Speaker #0
Yeah. So you might've got from my accent. I'm Australian. I live in Dubai, so I'm here in sunny, sunny hot Dubai. I'm a mum of two amazing teenage daughters. So that's sort of, I guess, personally. So professionally, I'm an ex-corporate lawyer, but I've changed things completely. And I'm now actually, I'm a life coach that specialises in menopause coaching. And I'm, my life's mission now is to try and raise awareness and about menopause and help. women going through menopause and also everyone else impacted by it which is everybody else that's not going through it i'm a super super curious person like really curious and i'd call myself probably i'm a curious traveler right so i when when i think so i was born and raised and educated in australia and then i was really really lucky that my parents took me overseas when i finished school and i was just absolutely mesmerized by going to like different places and learning about different cultures and meeting people from different parts of the world. And it was then at, what, 17, I decided I wanted to live and work overseas. So that's now, I've been away for 26 years. I love Australia, but I've lived, I've been so lucky and privileged to live in different countries from Hong Kong, Singapore, Indonesia, now Dubai. So I'd say I'm a curious traveller. And I'm normally not a nervous traveller, but I'm my next trip is in July and I'm going to climb Mount Kilimanjaro and I will openly say that I'm really nervous about it so I'm not nervous about the travel I think I'm nervous about the climb so I'm not yeah but this is I'd say the first thing I'm I'm at a stage in life and talk later that I really want to challenge myself and you know have these new adventures and this is something I've been thinking about for probably 10 years but never thought I would do it
- Speaker #1
and my youngest just finished her exam so we're going off in july to climb that kilimanjaro so it's a little bit wow i mean that's so exciting and terrifying but also really fun and you're so you're doing it with your daughter yeah
- Speaker #0
she's 16 now so we're doing it together and i've got two daughters the other one is like not interested i'll stay on but yeah so it's me and my youngest daughter so it's it's gonna be it's gonna be great
- Speaker #1
I love that. I love just kind of getting to hear a little bit about who you are and things that you enjoy. And what led you to Dubai specifically? Like what made you kind of stop there and go, yes, I want to be in Dubai?
- Speaker #0
Yeah, so I came here for a job. So previously in my legal career, I was a partner in a great big international law firm. And as many would probably think, well, you know, you're living the life and you've become so successful. and i had my kids were like two and three at the time they're 16 months apart and i sort of woke up one day and just went i'm not even i've had two kids and i'm not even seeing them grow up like i was traveling all the time and i was coming home sort of 2am and getting up at 7 to leave and they were going to school and i just sort of thought what am i doing and um decided i wanted to leave sort of partnership and working in a law firm and go in-house so i was really lucky that that one of my clients, it just happened to be. strange how the world works. At the time I was starting to think this, one of my clients said, hey, would you ever think of coming and working for us? And by the way, if you did that, you'd have to move to Dubai. And I was sort of like, awesome, where do I sign up? So it was a client brought me here and I've been here now seven years. Wow. Now I'm no longer working as a corporate lawyer. So things have changed.
- Speaker #1
Yeah. So talk to us a little bit about your experience and kind of your tension with experience, the bothness of things.
- Speaker #0
Yeah. So when I first heard about your podcast, which, and I just, I just loved it. And I thought menopause now I've gone through it and come out on the other side. It's such a, it can be, you know, it's so challenging for so many women. And it was for me as well. You know, I, my challenging thing is I had absolutely no idea I was going through it. And this was perimenopause. pause, which we can talk about later. You know, my mom never talked about it. You know, she had a hysterectomy after she had me at 35. My sister never talked about it, even though we're close. And, you know, I was just falling asleep at work. I suddenly couldn't remember things. And, you know, I'd always prided myself as this, in a way, you know, high power to the corporate lawyer. And suddenly I went on a call and I can't even remember, you know, what I wanted to say. And I actually became I became really depressed and I just simply I just didn't like all I can explain Nikki is I just didn't like who I was and how I was treating people and I just thought you know what is this and um you know I went to doctors I was diagnosed with depression you know I look at it now I was absolute textbook age for you know menopause and the thing that perimenopause which is the stage before menopause textbook um symptoms and It wasn't until I started having hot flushes, which was the only thing I at the time knew about menopause. I thought it was an old lady thing and they don't have their period and they have hot flushes. I still had my period, but I was thinking I'm having hot flushes. Is there something wrong with me or what's going on? Now, at the time this was happening and we can talk about later, I went to doctors and no one, you know, and female doctors as well, who were really good, but still none of them even asked about it or even said, let's look at your hormones. But at the same time, I had, I had a really bad seizure and my daughters were with me, which was great. You know, they got me help and they got me to hospital, but it really impacted my youngest daughter, who was 14 at the time. And, you know, when you think about it, seeing your mom lying on the ground, she'd never experienced anything like this before having a seizure. you know, it was terrifying for her. But what I did is I went straight back to work the next day and was like, I'm fine. I can do this. And actually was on the phone to a colleague who was an older gentleman. And I just burst into tears and I was, and he's like, what's wrong? And I explained what had happened. And I said, he said, what are you worried about? And I said, I'm so scared it's going to happen again. And he sort of like, well, he was actually amazing and and really calm and he's sort of like, not like. what are you doing you're an idiot get off the phone and take a break he said yeah I'm worried about it happening again and he said look you know I'd like I think you should take some time off and actually he was great he rang my boss my boss told me to take some time off but and it was nothing to do with the menopause I was diagnosed as having non-diabetic hypoglycemia which is like a drop in in blood sugar but at the time as I was going through menopause you know I look back at it I wasn't looking after myself. I was drinking too much alcohol. I was overweight. I was not eating well. I was, you know, trying to be this high powered lawyer. I was actually doing two full-time jobs at the time for the company that I was with. And I was just like, it was this absolute wake up call that's like, what am I doing? I need to reassess my life and I need to work out what is, what's working, what isn't working. You know, I've got to change some things and So what do I do? You know, you go to Google doctor, start googling things. And I'll say the seizure was an absolute game changer in my life. And together then, you know, with all the menopause symptoms, this awakening that I had. So, you know, I started off with my nutrition and share with you, I'd had bulimia as a child and it's a 20s and 30s. And that came back again in with my menopause. And so I started, you know, studying sustainable nutrition through Harvard and, you know, sort of things like this. I started reading about strength training. So it was a lot of personal sort of research that I did. But it was amazing by doing this, you know, how challenging menopause can be. I somehow found this sort of strength and clarity and purpose that and I started to care about myself. Whereas before, I think I'd been worried about everybody else. And I was like... I actually need to start looking up. It's, you know, the whole putting on the, in the aeroplane and you need to put on the oxygen mask before other things. And I realised I had to be alive for my daughters. You know, I had meanwhile got divorced. I was a single mum. So it turned from this journey, just being this bloody hard journey to this totally empowering journey of self-awareness. and I became, I would say, really like bold and actually brave. And it sounds funny, but one of the main things that's come out of it is I've learned to say no,
- Speaker #1
you know,
- Speaker #0
which might sound funny. But that is like one of the biggest sort of learnings. It's like, I don't have to do all of this. I don't have to say yes to this. I'm in charge of my own destiny. So I think it was, you know. started off really bad and it was really challenging and a lot of women have similar stories you know and even worse stories than than mine but then this catalyst together with sort of having the seizure which I'm now look back at it and despite how horrible it was I'm super grateful that it happened because together the two things just just made me change my life and I'm and I would say I'm a completely different person yeah
- Speaker #1
well and that doesn't sound funny at all I think you know when I hear you talk about that and say one, just all of the things you're experiencing within a relatively short period of time. That's so much. And then two, like, yeah, I think a lot of women can relate to that sense of like, we don't know we can say no, or there's just like not this thought that like no is even a possibility. And then we give and give and give and like deplete ourselves for work, for family, for everything else but us. So I don't think that sounds silly at all. I think that does sound like a very eye-opening and empowering moment, but also really hard moment, like all kind of wrapped up into one. So how old were you? Cause that was a lot of stuff that was happening, kind of like converging around the same time. Like how old were you when all of that was sort of unraveling or occurring in the same moment?
- Speaker #0
47 to 48, which I now realize I'm looking back, I started my perimenopause, which is textbook. So it's between 45. to 50 normally is perimenopause and you know it was part of the moving to Dubai and then getting divorced and interestingly a lot of there's a huge increase in women that do decide and they initiate divorce in this age group as well and I think some say I mean it's menopause symptoms can impact it but I think it's also part of this women just being empowered and deciding not to put up with you know what they may have been putting up with before. or whatever but it was the right thing for me um for me then so yeah so 47 48 interestingly with my journey is covert came in the middle of it and i i for me when when i started to have the you know the hot flushes and things and i went to a doctor and we're also you know that's what like oh it could be it might not be but my main symptoms were this what we call brain fog and I couldn't remember things and you know and she said oh that could be COVID so you know sort of post-COVID symptoms so she's like could be COVID could be menopause oh I don't really know so you know they do a hormone test and when you're in perimenopause is when your your estrogen in particular is going up and down like this so on any day you could have a blood test and look perfectly normal But actually, you know, the hormones are stable then, but they might be up and down, etc. Particularly with the estrogen, the progesterone goes down a bit slower. So I had the blood tests and everything came out fine. And really, you should be, I now know that you should be treating the symptoms and not necessarily, you know, if someone's presenting with symptoms of menopause, you need to start looking at it. But that just wasn't the journey that I had at the time. And with the doctor who was my family doctor, she was amazing. And I didn't really think to go any. go any further with it. So, but it was then when obviously your periods, my period started to stop and it stopped for six months. And I thought, oh, here we go. And then it came back again. And menopause itself is actually the one day after a period of 12 months that you haven't had a period that you are classified as being in menopause. So, and this is, as I said before, what I thought menopause was, you don't, you don't have a period. So that was when I started to actually think I'm going to go back to the doctors and became a bit more empowered. I think I would say to advocate for myself and Google doctor helps when you've got no other resources to go through.
- Speaker #1
Yeah.
- Speaker #0
And talking, I started talking to people and asking people, you know, luckily I'm not someone that's embarrassed by things like this, but a lot of women are not in the position where they can talk to people whether it's culturally or they just don't have someone that they could so it was then at sort of 50 51 that i then knew i was in menopause and started to you know learn a lot more about it and um and then you know went to one doctor who said i couldn't go on hrt because my mum had breast cancer at the age of 88 which is like very late to have breast cancer and you know we can talk later about HRT and breast cancer and unknowns about that. But it was, you know, then in the journey that I then found the right doctor, went on hormone replacement therapy. Just for me, it doesn't work for all women. But for me, it was then sort of overnight that I started to feel better and really enhanced this journey of finding myself and being bold and being brave because I started to feel normal again.
- Speaker #1
In what ways did you feel like that showed up the most when you talk about feeling? empowered. You talk about feeling back to yourself again, to normal. What are some ways that actually showed up for you? Like, how did you know you were starting to get back to that?
- Speaker #0
For me a lot, it was, so, you know, there's physical symptoms, but then there's sort of the mental part of it. And when I started, like, I'm still remember Nikki, the first day I woke up and I thought, oh, I feel, I feel happy. I feel like I want to, you know, get out of bed. I'd, I had because it can really impact your sleep. Like I think I probably started to sleep through the night, but it was this feeling of being back to myself. But interestingly, I hadn't actually gone back to who I was before. I had actually, through I guess this journey of self-awareness, that I'd actually developed into something that I now look at, I think is better than I was before. But it was just that waking up and going, I don't feel like I want to, you know, bite my kids' heads off. climate. I'm better. I feel like I can, you know, go to work and I can have conversations and I'm not going to forget things. So for me, the physical symptoms, it were not as great for me as the, the mental symptoms of, you know, the brain fog, the anxiety, you know, the depression, and to just start to, to feel more normal.
- Speaker #1
Gosh. Well, and like how hard months I'm just thinking how hard must have that have been when it feels like the, you know, to your point, when I've heard of menopause, it really is like period hot flashes, like. That's what I think of, you know. But when you really dig in and hear more about the hormonal, internal, mental, emotional side effects of going through perimenopause or menopause, it feels like it also could very easily be misinterpreted and show up as depression, anxiety, some mental health issues. And I can't imagine how hard that must be for you and for a lot of other women going through this. Like, how do you... sift through that? How do you sift through what is a biological change versus mental, emotional challenges? How did you sift through that? It sounds like it was really the physical that made you realize it, but that would just be really hard.
- Speaker #0
No, it's a good question. On my journey, and I wasn't very knowledgeable about it, I first went to talk to doctors because I come from a medical family and I thought, I'm just not feeling right. And I think um And also, you know, with menopause, you can put on weight as a lot of women put on weight around and their middle and things and you start to not feel good about yourself. And so I just started to realize I'm not right. And I went to see doctors. I didn't get the help that I needed. And then I thought, I just don't feel right. This is not normal, Susie. So that was, as I said, then I went to start to research things for myself. And, you know, we're so lucky in the day and age of the internet. I think back of women who went through this before when it wasn't talked about, they didn't have the resources that we have now, that I researched and I went more empowered into the doctor to then say, hey, this is what's going on. Now, you hate to go to a doctor and say, this is what Google doctor says. Yeah. This is really what I think. And I really try now to help women to advocate for themselves. I mean, I'm... I'm so lucky. I mean, I was a lawyer, so I was used to going in and advocating for other people. But it was amazing how initially I wasn't doing it for myself. And I sort of sat and went, you know, what are you doing? This is you, this is your health, this is your own body. And I really think that, you know, I knew when my children actually never said anything to me at the time. Now when we talk about it, when I realized that my I wasn't present for there for them like I had been before and you know the crazy thing is with menopause depending on the personal situation of the person the age group you're in you've often got young kids and they might be going through their teenage years so they're getting their periods and you're going through all of that hormones at the time many people are in the peak of their career and others have also got you know they're looking after aging parents as well So, and my parents are in Australia. I'm lucky I've got. you know other siblings that sort of they're helping with that but you can this whole whammy comes on you you know and you and then I think a lot of us as women we just think well I've I've just got to deal with this I've got to I've got to front up to work I feel terrible and you know if you look back at it and think you know we going through periods and all of that stage as well we are just taught to just show up and put up with it yeah and we're we're not taught to really speak out about it. I mean, the younger generation now is amazing. And there's actually an amazing term called millenopause, where they're hoping that millennials will be the first generation that will actually go through perimenopause and will be aware of, you know, all of the symptoms that happen to them. And when you think about it, it's kind of insane. But, you know, we're all on a journey and, you know, people's awareness and things about this. You know, I think back to the... People say, why didn't we talk about this before? And I think there was a lot of stigma around it. Culturally, in a lot of countries, there's still stigma around it, Nikki, that people can't talk about it. But there wasn't the resources, as I said, the internet that we have now. And it was just such a taboo subject.
- Speaker #1
If you're like me and dinnertime creates so much anxiety and stress and you have very little time, especially if you have kids, from the time you get home until bedtime, let me suggest Hungry Roots. Hungry Root has been a game changer for our family. Every week I go in and I pick out our meals for the following week. I get to select four servings, which is huge. A lot of delivery services don't allow for multiple servings like that, but it's enough to feed our family. They are really affordable, but significantly cheaper than what you would get with some of the other subscriptions out there that tend to be very pricey and fancier, I would say. than Hungry Root, but it also offers a lot of healthy options. And so you can pick different dietary restrictions. Like I usually always select anti-inflammatory for the family, which is like a lot of fish, a lot of veggies, a lot of chicken, but you can also select vegan, vegetarian, high protein, gluten-free, all these different variations that you can choose from. That's affordable. It's healthy. And almost every single meal is less than 30 minutes to make. And oftentimes if it's more than 30 minutes, it's just the. bake time that takes a little bit longer. The prep time on almost all of these meals is very minimal that even somebody like me who has self-proclaimed that I do not like to cook because it creates anxiety and stress in me, I can even make these meals. It's been easy on my husband who's the one that cooks because I prepare ahead of time like what the recipes are going to be. I pick them on hungry route and I choose things that are easy for his preference that I know him and the kids and myself are going to like. And it's made our dinnertime routine. so much easier in a way that none of the other subscriptions have. And it's yet still affordable as if we were going to the grocery store and getting our groceries. So if you want to try it out, I highly recommend it regardless of if it's just you, just you and a partner or you and kids. It works for any size family, any size household. And if you're interested, you can click the link below and get $50 off your first box. You know, it feels like like you said, making progress. And we're hopefully there where millennials are the first kind of generation to be aware of that. And yet it's still funny how, I don't know, funny is the right word, but I still don't hear it talked about very much. I think it's funny because even I don't hear it talked about that much and I'm 35. And so, you know, I'm not quite in that normal age range yet, but it feels like, you know, having these conversations and hearing from you, I'm like, gosh, shouldn't I be starting to think about like... at least be aware of it in the coming 10 years to go, well, what do I need to be on the lookout for? Like, here's how it could show up. So it is kind of that interesting situation where, you know, and I didn't think about it till you just said it, but also it really sucks for women because you are typically in that sandwich generation when it happens. So you're, you have kids and, or also potentially have aging parents and you're going through this big shift and it lasts for such a long time. And I think for a lot of us, it is easy to just turn off. Like I think you kind of mentioned this earlier. I don't know a better way to say it, but almost like a switch where you can turn off and go, I can't like feel my body. I can't, I have to ignore all these things to just like push through. And I don't know about you, but it feels like to change your own habits to stop disconnecting, right? Because we can't stop feeling. We can't stop staying in tune with our body. And yet you have pressure from. all these different sides, three, four sides, right? And so it does feel like sometimes the only option is to just like turn the switch off and just keep moving, which is the exact opposite of what we probably need to be doing, especially with menopause specifically, because you got to be in tune with your mental, emotional state, with your physical state. So yeah, I just, there's so many things that feel like converge around this, which make it really hard.
- Speaker #0
Yeah, and, you know, what's so interesting about it is that when you think about it, all women who live long enough are going to go through menopause. You don't get away from it sort of thing. Now, that said, there is sort of medical and surgical menopause, and there's also premature menopause that people can go through. So some people, unfortunately, they have to have their ovaries removed. They have surgical menopause, or chemotherapy means they go into medical menopause. and some women just go through it early and they... they don't have like 80% of the women that go through early, they don't even have an explanation for it. But when you think about that, basically every woman is going to go through it, that, that and women's approximately 50% of the population, think of the impact that has on society. Because, you know, whether you're a spouse or a brother or a sister or a colleague or a child, and you know, that the impact it has on the whole of society, because when you're going through this. And, you know, the thing is also now is women are working longer. So they're staying in the workforce longer. There's more women in the workforce and they're staying longer. So it's becoming a sort of a work health and safety matter as well, actually, because, you know, to try and help women in the workplace. Because so many women, you know, they go part time or they feel they can't speak to their boss. They won't go to a promotion because they're going through this at the time. So it really is something, you know. when you actually think about it, it's kind of insane that it impacts half the population and the impact then that it can have. And look, all women are different. Some women don't have many symptoms at all. And then others have absolutely horrific debilitating symptoms too. So there's a, which I think is also what makes it hard is there's no one, you know, size fits all sort of thing. But when you think about the impact on society and, you know, I also think about little kids that suddenly mum changes and she's not the mum where's mum gone she's grumpy at me all the time and you know partners in marriage if you know if you know that if it is a husband and wife you know they the husband maybe I don't know what's happening to my wife etc so you know and then colleagues at work and you know I look back on it now and I I when I reflect and think when I was younger and look at some of I reported into some amazing um you know female partners in law firms and things but you would sometimes go oh you know she's she's so grumpy she's you know like this and I look back and I think now what was she probably going through and and even my kids come home from school and say this teacher's like this and this one is so grumpy and they're talking about male and female but more from the female teachers and I just say well how old are they you know let's think about this do you think they could be going through through menopause and so it's just the impact that it can can have on everyone and if we understand it better and we're more aware of it. It just could be an absolute game changer for everyone, I think.
- Speaker #1
My gosh, yeah. And even like the losing of the stigma to be able to just be up front and be like, hey, I am going through menopause. So if you, you know, if you encounter me in a way that doesn't feel like me, typically, like that might be why. And like, you know, and have some understanding and grace and for that situation. And, you know, you talked about it a little bit, but. for a lot of people who maybe aren't as familiar with this, can you share a bit about like, when you think about what's true and what's not true, like fact and fiction around menopause, can you share a little bit about those things? Because I think there are probably some things we don't know. And then there are some things we think we know that might be wrong.
- Speaker #0
Yeah, no, absolutely. And I think, you know, like, like many things, this can happen, but I think particularly with menopause. So I think I touched on it before, but I think most people think that men is only something that happens to old women. And I thought this too. So, you know, but as I said, women can start it earlier, you know, even as early in their thirties, they can start going through menopause, but you know, for different reasons. And, you know, as I said, you know, there's the surgical menopause. And I think another thing just also to mention, I probably should have mentioned this earlier, but transgender men can go through menopause and also non-binary folk can go through menopause. And I think that's often the section that people forget about because we always talk about women. And I've talked about women here and I probably should have made that point earlier. Then it's really important to remember that, you know, you could be at work and you might have transgender men and you just don't actually think, oh, they can be going through menopause first as well as the non-binary folk. but I think it's not just something that happens to older women. Large majority, yes, but also when you think about when I thought older women, you know, I did not feel old in my 50s when I was going.
- Speaker #1
Yeah, yeah.
- Speaker #0
I don't think 50 is old.
- Speaker #1
No.
- Speaker #0
You know, to think it's, you know, I think it's, you know, sort of older generations is a bit older and I think, look, we're as old as we feel so I don't really like to put, you know, ages on with categories as old. So I think that's the first thing that only happens to older women. I think the second one which we've touched on is also that it only impacts women. And as I said, you know, it impacts so many other people. You know, all of us generally interact with women at some level in our lives. So it's going to impact, you know, the colleague, the children, you know, the brother, you know, the spouse. And as a colleague and as a female even when you're younger, you're not aware of this because it hasn't happened to you and I think it's really something that until it's happened to you it's really hard to actually understand how how difficult it can be and you know that's the same with a lot of things in life you know people with disabilities you cannot understand unless you know you've until you've walked in someone's shoes and we all need to be a lot more mindful of that in you know life in general so I think there are two things and I I think the third one which It's, I think, still a work in progress for society, Nikki, but is this issue about people thinking that HRT causes breast cancer or increases the risk of breast cancer.
- Speaker #1
And what is HRT for those?
- Speaker #0
For HRT, it's hormone replacement therapy. So with that causes your estrogen and your progesterone decline and also testosterone, which some people don't realize women have testosterone, that declines, but at a slower stage. So what we naturally produce in life and we build up starts to decline and this is so you know and also all of the eggs you know the two to four million eggs that women are born with, by the time you get to menopause they're all gone so you know and this is the process and you know how it happens. So hormone replacement therapy is basically all the estrogen that you've loss and estrogen impacts you know cardiac health musculoskeletal health and so many other aspects of our body not just reproductive that it's actually just giving you estrogen or progesterone and for some women testosterone so it's hormone replacement therapy so people might have it as tablets they have it as gels they have it as patches so it's one of the main treatments that women will use for menopause so you think as these all of these symptoms you have because your hormones are declining if you give you some back it's going to impact the symptoms. And a lot of women, you know, even within a week can start to feel better. Some women go on hormone replacement therapy, give it a go for a few months and don't feel better at all. And that can happen. But it's one of the main treatments now to help women who are not, they're not able to manage their symptoms and they, you know, things like also bone health, your bone health can be, you know, starts to decrease from the age of 30 actually. So there it's. It's an absolutely safe for most people. You've got to, you take it, you go to a doctor and you assess all the risks, et cetera. But there was this research back in the 2000s about the, which came out saying there was an increase in breast cancer if you went on hormone replacement therapy. And this led to sort of widespread fear about going on AT and everyone's like, I'm not going to go on it. And actually this study involved a really small group of women. and they're on quite high doses of hrt to what what people take you know and i think we all know look if menopause i think was something that happened to men it would probably be the most researched in the world but it's not and you know it's only recently that you know um you know testing started to be done on women and you know even it's it's crazy like um tampons were only recently started to be tested with actually blood and not with you know liquid and stuff so We are progressing and things are happening, but with all more research that we have now, Nikki, that it's basically people now realise, and we've got medical research on this, that if it's taken under medical supervision and you weigh out the risk, it's not necessarily increasing the risk of breast cancer. And the thing is, I mean, breast cancer is horrific. Don't get me wrong. And I've had lots of friends who suffered from it. But actually in the US, one in eight women are going to be diagnosed with breast cancer at some stage. And that's leaving aside the whole hormone replacement therapy, you know, risk analysis as well. That's a really large number, you know. And when you think about that, that's the risk. And I think, you know, with... if you know you look at your family history of breast cancer and women who've had breast cancer a lot of them who are on estrogen blockers they can't go on um HRT so some people can't but you know it's something that um you can you can test for it if you're having mammograms regularly etc as well so I think just one of the other you know myths that really needs to be debunked is this whole people just absolutely think can't won't go on HRT because I don't want to get breast cancer and it doesn't cause breast cancer. And so I think that's just one thing that, you know, I think we really need to do more research on it as well, but people need to understand because so many women are scared to go on it because you know what they read in the media about, about HRT and the increased risk of breast cancer.
- Speaker #1
And is it primarily with, with hormone replacement therapy, is it usually replacing estrogen or could it be estrogen.
- Speaker #0
and testosterone or what what are the biggest things i'm imagining it's estrogen but no so it's a really good question so typically it's estrogen and progesterone not so many will go on testosterone and also testosterone can be really difficult to find and it's and it's typically not covered by a lot of health insurance either and there's lots women will go on it for different reasons so for some that might if it's a lot of women have um it impacts their libido or they have vaginal dryness etc so they might take it you know in a gel that they would you know Bye. would use in their vaginal area. Others, it's tablets, it's patches, it's gels. So there's lots of different types of it. But yeah, it's typically estrogen and progesterone, and then some will have testosterone.
- Speaker #1
Yeah. And that's really interesting because even the idea of hormone replacement therapy, I haven't really even thought of. I didn't really know it existed. I didn't know that that was a treatment, especially for perimenopause, menopause symptoms, it is kind of fascinating that just the lack of conversation, I think, around all these pieces. Yeah.
- Speaker #0
Yeah. No, well, well, hopefully, you know, sort of through this podcast and if you've got a younger, some younger listeners, et cetera, they'll start to learn about, and there's a, there's a lot more women now in perimenopause who are starting, a lot of people just think you don't have HRT until you're in menopause too. You can take it during perimenopause if your symptoms are really impacting your life. Like I'm not saying just, you know, think your perimenopause run out there and get you know go on hrt because there's so many other sort of you know holistic um ways that you can look you don't need to sort of go on on the medication and you know things like changing your diet and looking at your exercise and working on ways to sleep better can you know absolutely help you and so not every woman has to go on hrt but those where you know as i said some of these symptoms are really debilitating and i've you know i know people who have been diagnosed with dementia. And then have, you know, stopped working and then realized that it wasn't dementia at all. It was actually just, it was perimenopause and menopause. And, you know, can you imagine being diagnosed with dementia and then realizing later, because you, and you tell, I mean, a doctor tells you you've got dementia, you believe it. It can really impact people's lives. So it's, it's not for everyone. Not everyone goes on it, but for some women where it's, it can really, really help, help them to know.
- Speaker #1
I know it's shifting, right? So like we're moving in the right direction, but.
- Speaker #0
like why would you think people didn't used to talk about it and even still to this day like struggle to talk about it I think it's a real taboo topic and as for some people it's still a taboo topic when I first studied life coaching and I was having a hot flush and I started just waving myself with the notes and the person it was actually it was a man running it and he said there's an issue with the air conditioning you know we're in Dubai it's hot and I just said oh my god now I'm having a hot flush And the look of the people in the room, like some were giggling, people didn't know where to look. And, you know, these are people training to be coaches of life.
- Speaker #1
Coaches, yeah.
- Speaker #0
And, I mean, I'm also in the Middle East where a lot of these things are not talked about so openly that they may be in other countries. But, you know, women came up to me at half time and said, oh, my God, Susie, you were so brave to have gone and said that. You know, I've been experiencing this and that and I've... you know, said, hey, look, let's talk about it. And they'd never thought to talk to anybody about it. So I think there's this, it was seen as a very private, private thing, because it was, it was women's health, right? I think in the old days, did people talk about periods? Very often, no. And now I think people are a lot more open. I know my kids' generation talking about having their periods and boys now know about periods, et cetera, et cetera. So I think it was a private, a taboo topic. I think also in society, and I think this is still where we're at a bit now, is that society can so tend to focus on youth and fertility and there's so much media and marketing around that. It then made menopause seem like that's the end of your life and it's a stage of loss as opposed to, you know, I see it as this stage and this is where the both comes in, that it can be a totally empowering stage in a woman's life. So just like it is for when teenagers get their periods, that's a stage up and this is just the same on sort of the other end. So I think that's part of it. I think the lack of medical research. like on a lot of women's health topics, there was so little research on it. And I think that, you know, in the old days, women, they weren't taught to speak out like, you know, maybe the generations that we've been brought up in. And, you know, they just thought, I've just got to accept that. And I've talked to a lot of older women who've just said, well, it's just what happened. We went, you know, we went through it and we didn't talk about it even to our friends. So I think this, the stigma and the silence was generational. And I really do think we've like, you know, it's, we've, we've hit a stage where people now, like, I mean, there's a lot of celebrities now that are now talking out about it. Or I just saw an interview somewhere in a, I can't remember what it was, she was on the red carpet and she said, oh, I've just had a hot flush. I think it was just yesterday. And I just thought, yes, this is what we need. We need to see because, you know, I think if, I really do think if men had met, men have andropause. So there is a male equipment, but it happens a lot later in life and it's not as severe. So, you know, there is, there is a similar thing for men. But I think if women are so taught to just put up with things, be quiet about it, it's a, it's a female issue, put up with it. And I really do think, and I'm not trying to be sexist about this, but I think if it did happen to men, it would be a completely different. story that we'd be in a completely different position to where we are now.
- Speaker #1
Yeah, I think you're right. Even just the thought of like erectile dysfunction research, it's kind of where my brain went. Like I've heard about that even as a child back in the 90s, like you heard about that. And so that's something that obviously has impacted men. It's been researched, it's been talked about. There's a lot of that same experience for women, right? With like libido and things like that. And yet we're just now. getting to the point of like trying to start researching and understanding what that experience is like for women. So yeah, I think you're right. I think it would be interesting to kind of get perspective on culture from you. But having grown up in America, at least I can say like, you know, obviously, the culture here has historically been one of men in power and the heads of medical organizations have typically been men like in the last 100 years, that's changed, and is changing. But when you think about research and
- Speaker #0
women's health and women's issues I mean it has not historically been at the forefront of their minds so I mean it makes a lot of sense no absolutely and I think it's also the research that we now have in relation to menopause and women's health majority of it is done with Caucasian women which is like yeah that's a great point wonderful of yeah actually the 51 they say is the average age for a woman to go into menopause you know the 12 months with no period That's a Caucasian woman. So actually Asian women go through it a little bit earlier and I think statistics for India are now it's 46 is the average age. Black women is about 48 to 50, so it's a little bit, you know, but all of the research that we have now is predominantly on Caucasian women. So I think that's something that also needs to change as well. And, you know, I think 2023, 1.2 billion women. were impacted by menopause like that's a it's a huge number you know and as we talked about you mentioned you know culturally it's you know i i really feel for the poor women that feel that they can't even you know discuss this it's within their culture with you know their their family and um you know and even with friends there's so many more now you know women's groups getting together people that are developing that um you know it's sort of menopause support groups where people can can go and talk and obviously also then you know, educating the rest of the world and organizations and men because they're impacted by it too.
- Speaker #1
Yeah. Oh my gosh. Yeah. And you, you know, you talked a little bit about this in the beginning and sort of throughout really your whole story here, but when you think about summarizing the big points of both, right, what was the difficult, the hard? and the tension mixed with the empowerment and kind of the almost, I don't want to say rebirth, but resurgence of like finding yourself. And what were some of those key things on both sides? And did you have awareness of both happening at the same time? Or was that something that you came to be aware of after the fact after processing and thinking about it later?
- Speaker #0
Yeah, no, really, really good question. My personal journey was absolutely afterwards. So, and that was after then I, so as I said before, I was in perimenopause and had absolutely no idea and was just not starting to feel, feel like myself as I explained. And that happened to coincide with COVID. So it was like a double whammy of not sort of being able to understand what it was. And, you know, it was interesting because even then I'd like to think that I'm a smart woman and did I not actually go to take this any further and just think, oh, I really don't feel like myself and I can't remember what I'm saying. but um you know we believe what doctors tell us yeah and um you know and act and to let you know it's actually insane that in medical school i mean some some gps will have one week of women's health education or even one you know one day and i mean i went to see some some of the gynecologists i went to see and you know their lack of understanding of menopause was really low and i and i expected gynecologists would know about this and i now realize that there are gynecologists who specialise. in menopause and they're the ones that you need to go and see. So I was lucky that I eventually found the right people. And when I then started to really understand what was going on and then going for me personally, going on a hormone replacement therapy and starting to feel better and think, okay, I've put on a lot of weight. As I said before, I had bulimia. Now my bulimia is coming back again. I need to address this and I need to, previously I was saying, you know, with a lot of this I was doing for my children because of the seizure that I'd had. And I thought I have to be there and I have to be present for my children. And I think with a lot of women, that's often your driver. It's how I, how I am for other people. And then I had sort of this light bulb switch and it was like, I, I need to do this. This is for me. Like I need to live my life. I need to. feel better. I want to enjoy my life. And I think also it was, you do, for me personally, with menopause, Nikki, I did, you know, you start to realize you are getting older and think what I want to be able to, I don't want to break my hip, you know, when I'm old, I want to try and prevent that. And then learned about things, you know, strength training, which I'd always been sort of exercising, running and things like this, but the weight wasn't moving. And this is very common you hear with medical. It's like strength training is what we need to do to have strong, healthy bones. And I started, I'd never strength trained and lift weights in my life and found this, found myself a personal trainer, this huge, you look like Thor, like this huge, great big trainer who was great. I then realized though, that personally, I needed to see a female trainer who understood a little bit more about, about this. He was, he was really, really good, but I also just got bored sort of lifting the weights, but it was, you know, looking at my... about my diet and seeing food more as nutrition. And it was there to fill my body and make me fit. And it was going to make me feel better. And things like, you know, stopping having processed sugar. And now I've researched more and realized the impact that that can also have on things like cancer and stuff like that. So it was when I started to feel better, I just then started to feel more empowered. And the more I researched and talked to people and found out about it, you know, and then obviously, as I said at the beginning, this then led on to me. changing my career and wanting it impacted me so much I thought I really want to raise awareness about this and help women in any way that I can so mine absolutely happened later but I do see I was just reading a blog that a lady had written before and she was saying what if we saw perimenopause as a gift rather than you know being something that's negative and if you can realize hey if you're not already strength training and looking after yourself now's the time to start doing it. And this is sort of the gift to you to start being healthy and not, you know, leaving it too late. Because, you know, when you start to have pre-diabetic symptoms and stuff like that, you know, we want to try to be preventing things like this. And it's never too late to exercise and strength train. But I'm just so grateful that it happened. And a lot of women that I do talk to who've come out the other end of metaphors start to talk about how they feel empowered. They started to set boundaries. they've you know started to learn to say to say no um they know how to ask for help whereas before they didn't feel that you know they could ask their kids to do things and for help and it's like no i can do this so it's this you know it challenging but if you can come out the other end i came out the other end and was empowered and i'm sort of on a mission to try and help people become empowered earlier on in the journey and not have to to unnecessarily suffer when you know you don't have to now you can't stop all of some of the symptoms are so horrific that some people will suffer and i'm not saying that everything can be be fixed but um you know it's it's understanding that there are so many things that you can do to start to feel better, both, you know, physically, mentally. Yeah.
- Speaker #1
And what would you say, you know, as we're wrapping up, like, what would you say to somebody, to a woman who thinks they might be experiencing this or who might be in the middle of it? Like, what might you say to them?
- Speaker #0
Yeah. So I would say to them, I think one of the hardest things are the symptoms that you can have. It's, you can sometimes feel like you can't think through things in a logical way. and there are some really good out there things start to write down how you're feeling right as much as you might not want to do it and i'm not not necessarily journaling but writing down this is how i feel there's a lot of things they're called menopause symptom trackers and they're not freely available and there's there's lots of amazing you know organizations now that you know they have it you can just down just download it go through it and start do i feel like this do i feel like that? How often am I feeling like this? And I think I suggest write it down and don't just think about it because I think when we write things down, it's just so much more powerful. And then you've got the record and, you know, you may think, oh, it's not so it's maybe it's not menopause because the other thing that can happen is people think it is menopause.
- Speaker #1
So yeah, yeah.
- Speaker #0
What you're going through, then if you do feel that you want to go to a doctor, you've got it written down because they'll say, how are you feeling? And it's like, oh, I don't know. I feel like this. I just don't, you know, it doesn't help a doctor. for you to say, I don't feel like myself. It's certainly you need to explain that to them, but you can say, you know, my skin is itchy, which is a symptom, you know, a vaginal dryness, or, you know, my sleep has been impacted. If you start to feel not so, not yourself, start to write down how you're feeling, download one of these free menopause symptom trackers. If, and don't feel shy to go to a doctor and talk about this. If the doctor doesn't help you, and you don't feel like you're getting a... support you get, go to another doctor. So don't, and don't settle for what you may be told. And, you know, I mean, doctors are amazing. We'd be lost without them, but not all of them are, you know, familiar with menopause and the symptoms. And, you know, ask them, is this a GP? Is this something you're familiar with? And eventually my GP said, look, I'm not really sure, which was great. And we've learned together a lot. So write it down. Some, I think some women may never have advocated for themselves like this, but this is your body and it's your life and just really go. And if, if, if it doesn't sound right or it's not helping you go and try again and just, just don't give up.
- Speaker #1
Yeah, no, I think that's great. And I think, you know, it's so important to not give up and to keep saying, I'm going to keep searching for somebody who can help me with this because I think it's both parts, right? Like we, I think a lot of us know instinctively. something isn't right. Like I am not myself. And I think that's an important piece to know and to trust yourself in. And also to be able to have actual information and data to say, here are some of the ways in which that's showing up for me. Because without that, yeah, to your point, it is going to be really hard to get help and, and to like, figure out if it is menopause versus maybe you are experiencing a lot of, you know, depression, anxiety, and those are the primary things you're experiencing without. a lot of the other physical things or, but I'm just saying like, you know, being able to have that data, trust yourself and then keep pushing until you find someone that can help you. It's just very important.
- Speaker #0
Absolutely.
- Speaker #1
Yeah. Thank you so much for just sharing your, your story and being willing and vulnerable to talk about this. I think it is so important for us to talk about. I think it's so impactful for women and anyone listening, because I think, as you said, it affects everybody because we're all in relationship with women. Thank you. And before we go, one thing I do want to ask that I ask all my guests is something ridiculous or relatable. So is there something that you do a little quirk, a little habit, a little tendency that you do that is completely ridiculous, but maybe to others might be a little bit relatable?
- Speaker #0
Yeah. So I, and my kids will laugh that I'm sharing this publicly, but I am the queen of the power pose and I don't know. Yeah,
- Speaker #1
yeah, yeah. Yeah.
- Speaker #0
And I was... actually really really lucky that when I was in high school a teacher told us about it and I think and which is just I'm so grateful to this teacher um because I think I mean there's there's research behind it and I think after you finish go like this and there's so much power in it And from then, and even now to this day, and I did it before I came on the podcast. I love it.
- Speaker #1
I love it.
- Speaker #0
I go and I do the power pose. And I think if I, like if I'm at home, it's in, you know, it's in the bathroom and it's because it's good for yourself. If I'm out, I'll go to the toilet and I'll sit in the toilet cubicle and go, yes, you can do this. And I just find it, it's like, I feel it's my secret weapon. And if other... you know women or even other you know not just women have never done it it sounds crazy but you go and you put your arms up in a sort of a v shape and you go yes i can do it and i think as i said i think there's medical research and stuff behind it but yeah i don't actually now see it as being so ridiculous because i've been doing it for so long but my children do and i always say to them go to the bathroom and do the power pose and they're like right mommy and they're just like yeah okay so yeah the power pose
- Speaker #1
I love that how often do you do it
- Speaker #0
Well, so when everyone has an important meeting, so, you know, in the corporate world, and I've been doing this for years, like I'd been a lawyer in meetings and if I think that something is going to be hard or every time I do a public, like a presentation or get up at a conference and speak in front of people, I would go and do it. And, you know, I'm sure probably going up Mount Kilimanjaro, there'll be a few power places where I can do it. And when I get there. um, I'll, you know, I'll have it at, I'll have it at the end. So I do it a lot, but if I ever feel nervous about something or just, it's, it's a big meeting and I might not feel nervous, but I'm just like, you, you've got this. When I feel like I need a little bit of an extra, you've got this, I'll, I'll go and do my power pose.
- Speaker #1
Gosh, this is so great. I do think that's relatable because, you know, it might feel a little ridiculous. I think a lot of these things for us initially were like, what? But then you do it and you're like, okay, that actually, that does make a difference. friends. I've definitely, I don't do it as often as I used to, but I have done it before, especially if I get up and speak in front of large groups of people, which I often have had to do at work. I will be in the bathroom, like just with my arms up, you know, doing the power pose. That's a great reminder to use it more. It was so good to talk to you today, Susie. And I will make sure and share all the information about you and getting in touch with you and all of your resources as well. But thank you for just your time and your story. And I really appreciate it.
- Speaker #0
Thank you. Thanks for opening up the space for me to talk about this. I appreciate it.
- Speaker #1
I just want to say thank you so much to Susie for being here today and for sharing with us. If you want to connect with Susie or learn more about her work, you can follow her on Instagram at yourthrive.co, or you can check the link in the show notes below. You'll find her coaching offerings, wellness tools, and more. If this show is meaningful to you and resonates with you, it would mean so much to me if you would take a moment to follow the show on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. You can do that by hitting the little plus sign on the main show page or hitting follow or subscribe. If you could also leave a rating or review and share it with somebody who might need it, it would mean the world to me. This really is the most impactful thing that you can do for the podcast. And that's how this community grows, through real people, real stories, and honest conversations passed from one person to another. So thank you again for listening. And remember, it's okay to feel all the things, because so many times in life, it isn't either or.
